


Monster Among Men

by anothersadboy



Series: Monster Among Men [1]
Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Anxiety, Attempted Murder, Drug Dealing, Drug Use, Graphic Description of Corpses, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Major Character Injury, Murder, Past Drug Addiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-08-21 23:01:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 25
Words: 85,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16585943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anothersadboy/pseuds/anothersadboy
Summary: Over the past fourteen months, the countries Vere and Akielos have been plagued by Damen, a serial killer who has been brutally murdering someone monthly.





	1. Chapter 1

"How long has it been since they found the last body?" Laurent asks his older brother. Auguste is sprawled out over the white leather couch in the spacious living room, with his laptop in his lap and a notebook next to him. He looks up at Laurent as he enters the room. 

"Over a week," Auguste says. He picks up the notebook and passes it to Laurent, then continues to type on his laptop. Over the past year, Auguste has been obsessed with trying to find this infamous serial killer that has viciously murdered twelve people. The killer leaves a new victim for the police to find every month. The only similarities between the victims are their blonde hair and pale skin. The cause of death is always blood loss. Evidence points to the serial killer being a very large man. There is no evidence ever left behind, but there is one video of what is suspected to be the killer, leaving a gas station near one of the victim's cities. The killer is practically a ghost, as all the victim's friends and families say there was not anyone new in their lives. The detectives on the case have not been able to find any connections between the victims.

Every time they find a new victim, Auguste says he thinks the next one will be around here, in their city. Laurent generally tunes his brother out when he is going on one of his rants about the killer. Laurent would be fine with Auguste’s obsession with finding this killer, he is a sick man who deserves to go to jail. The problem is, Auguste is not a detective on this case, he’s not even a detective, and it’s not his job to find this guy. He is putting his life out on the line for something that does not concern him. "He has to be around here this time, based on his murder patterns, we're the right distance away."

"So you've told me," Laurent mumbles. Auguste goes on for a few minutes, repeating the same stuff he’s been telling Laurent for months; travel patterns, locations of murders, other details that Laurent does not care about. None of it is ever right and Laurent has heard it so many times he doesn’t have to listen to his brother anymore yet he could still recite the speech back to him. 

"Laurent? Are you listening to me? Please be careful tonight I know we are going out but he could be around here and if he hurts you-"

"Yes, I promise I'll be careful," Laurent says, cutting Auguste off mid-sentence. He looks at Auguste and he can tell that he is worried, how could he not be when he thinks there’s a murderer somewhere in town. "Aug, you know I can protect myself. Besides, you'll be there with me anyway, correct?"

"Yeah, I guess." Auguste sighs, obviously annoyed with how passive Laurent is being.

"Glad to see you still have enough sense to agree to logic.” Auguste laughs lightly at that response.."  
*  
Later that night Laurent goes to the club with his brother and his friends. It’s loud and rowdy, definitely not the type of place Laurent prefers to go to. But Auguste and his friends live for it and Laurent gets dragged out whenever he can’t come up with a valid excuse to get out of going. For some reason ‘fuck off’ isn’t good enough excuse for Auguste this time around.

"Please watch yourself tonight, I don't want you to get hurt," Auguste says.

"I can take care of myself," Laurent starts to make his way into the vibrant building, the music can be heard from where they are standing on the far side of the club’s parking lot. Auguste grabs his arm and yanks him back before he can take a second step. 

"I mean it Laurent, be careful who you talk to tonight, the killer is still out there." He yells over the booming music coming from inside the club.

"Bold of you to assume I’ll be socializing tonight. Also please remember, YOU are the one who dragged ME here. Now quit talking about murder, aren’t we supposed to be here to have fun?” Laurent pushes past Auguste and his friends, who have just joined them outside. As Laurent enters the crowded club he immediately looks for the bar, it was almost impossible to spot as the sheer amount of people squeezed into the large building. He makes a beeline towards the bar to order himself a drink and find a seat as Auguste and his friends run off elsewhere. Laurent doesn’t like drinking or dancing but he wants to try to have a good time tonight. Auguste spent days begging his brother to come out with him. Most of Auguste’s friends find Laurent annoying or just don’t like him, they tolerate his presence much as he does theirs. The only person he is here for is Auguste. But he is off with all of the guys, and Laurent doesn’t want to be a bother to him. 

Sitting alone at the bar gives Laurent plenty of time to assess all of the activity around him. He chose to sit in a spot close to the end of the bar where it is quieter, fewer people around to bother him. Interacting with drunk people irritates Laurent, as he hates alcohol and drunk people, but watching them make fools of themselves isn’t so bad. Men and women, men and men, women and women. They’re all over each other. 

Sitting on the other side of the bar, he spots a brute of a man. His skin is shades darker than Laurent’s, his dark curly hair is short, styled to look effortless but hot as hell. Even from a distance, Laurent can tell this man is beyond gorgeous. His beauty is equivalent to that of The Adonis. If you wanted to see a real-life sculpture made in ancient Akielos, one needs to look no farther than this man. Men and women alike stare, trying to get his attention, but his eyes are locked on Laurent. He gives only one or two the occasional glance or a few words before he brushes them off. He notices Laurent watching him and smiles. Laurent refuses to break eye contact first. Suddenly, the man gets up and he makes his way through the crowd. Laurent loses sight of him but spots him again and they lock eyes and he heads right towards Laurent. As he approaches, Laurent takes a moment to assess him from a closer distance, not even trying to hide the fact that he is checking the man out. He’s much taller than Laurent expected, his short-sleeved shirt hugs his biceps, so tight Laurent doesn’t know how he even got the damn thing on. 

The Adonis, as Laurent has taken to calling him in his mind, sits down in the seat next to Laurent and doesn't say a word. Instead, he orders himself a drink then he glances over. They make eye contact again, just like the first time, Laurent refuses to be the one that looks away, so the man does. His eyes trail down Laurent’s body then up again, his pace slow, appreciative. Taking his time looking Laurent’s body over.

"Are you just going to stare or are you going to say something?" Laurent asks. The Adonis looks startled for a second, surprised at Laurents candor, but smiles, his perfect white teeth in full view. "I'm more than just a pretty face."

"Just enjoying the view." The Adonis says, the bartender places a couple shots down in front of him, Adonis man doesn't even break eye contact as he downs his first shot.

"I’m sorry was that supposed to be sexy?” Laurent starts, “This situation is a little creepy don't you think? Staring me down, like a piece of meat, without even introducing yourself first?" The Adonis doesn’t say anything, he just smirks as he finishes off the second shot.

"What's your name sweetheart?" He asks, ordering Laurent another drink and pushing it towards him when the bartender puts it in front of him. Laurent hesitates and almost pushes it away, as the thought of Auguste’s worried face comes to mind, but he doesn’t want to insult this very attractive guy, so he drinks it. He saw the bartender pour it so it’s not like the Adonis man could slip something in it, one drink should be fine, Laurent thinks.

"Laurent," Laurent says, finishing off the drink quickly and sliding the glass away. Adonis man looks impressed, he tries to order another but Laurent stops him. Telling him he doesn’t like to drink.

"Well then, Laurent, my name is Damen. Now that I've introduced myself, may I continue what I came over here to do?" He questions. His tone is joking, but it’s obvious he is serious about what he wants. Laurent notices, there is a hint of an accent when Damen speaks.

"If you wish," Laurent says. He smiles and continues on checking Laurent out as he did before.

"A little formal for a club don't you think?" He asks, referring to the button up shirt and dress pants Laurent is wearing. Compared to Damen’s plain black t-shirt and black jeans, Laurent thinks his own outfit is better. But, Laurent admits to himself, the shirt Damen’s wearing does hug his biceps nicely. Damen catches Laurent looking him over and chuckles. "Now who is checking who out? I’m not a piece of meat you know, I have feelings too." Damen says pretending to be hurt.

"I think my outfit is more fitting for me than something like you're wearing," Laurent says flatly. He chuckles again and nods.

"Fair enough." Damen reaches out to Laurent and he has to hold himself back from jumping away, he keeps very still, to see what Damen is trying to do. Usually, he would have pulled away if anyone tried to touch him that isn’t Auguste, but for some reason, Laurent wants to know what's going through Damen’s mind. "Let's fix something though."

Damen undoes the top two buttons of Laurent’s shirt and lets his fingers linger on his chest. He runs his thumb over Laurent’s collarbone, causing Laurent to hold his breath. He doesn’t even know this man and he thinks he can touch Laurent this way. But even with that thought, Laurent tilts his head back and lets Damen’s fingers wander up to his chin. He brushes Laurent’s hair away and lets his hand rest at the base of Laurent’s neck.

"A little intimate for our first meeting don't you think, Damen?" Laurent asks, enunciating Damen’s name slowly. Damen pulls his hand away from Laurent's chin, and Laurent clenches his jaw, relaxing slightly only to clench up again as Damen places it on the bar over Laurent’s own. This foreign feeling in Laurent’s chest tells him to pull away but he doesn’t, he likes Damen’s touch. 

"Maybe so,” Damen admits “But, I want to leave here with you." He laughs slightly and adds, "I’m captivated by you."

"And you assume I'd feel the same?" Damen nods, a smirk on his face. Laurent scoffs, "And what gave you that idea?"

"Your heart rate did sweetheart." Laurent scoffs and pulls his hand out from under Damen’s and leans back. Damen laughs at his reaction, then bends slightly over to grasp Laurents hand tightly, but not so much that it would hurt, with his own. "Hey don't pull away from me, it's your heart that's racing not mine. I didn't know you felt that way about me, a little intimate considering it's our first meeting don't you think Laurent?"

"You mock me, but if a strange man welcomed himself into your personal space, unbuttoned your shirt, and held your hand I'm sure anyone's heart would race." Laurent spits back. This time when Damen orders himself another drink, Laurent lets him order one for him too. Laurent is not the type to drink very often, so the small amount that he’s had makes his head spin already, while Damen seems to barely be affected by twice the amount. To be fair, Damen is much larger than Laurent.  
Laurent glances around the room for Auguste, but he can’t see him or any of his friends anywhere. When he turns back to Damen he finds his eyes lazily wandering over Laurent’s body again. “Especially when that man is trying to get me drunk.”

"Is that a bad thing?" Damen asks, leaning in closer again.

"I want to see you drunk first." Damen laughs in surprise but orders himself a few more drinks, then proceeds to practically inhale them. “Slow down, if you throw up I’m leaving. We have time you don’t need to rush.”

"Whatever you say, _Prince_ Laurent." He says, mocking Laurent again. Laurent rarely lets himself look at anyone like this, but right now looking at Damen he wouldn’t mind leaving here with him if he can prove himself not to be a complete idiot. "Who did you come here with?" Damen suddenly asks.

"You assume I came here with someone?" Laurent questions. 

"You don't seem like the type to come to clubs, let alone here on your own."

"I'm here with my brother and his friends." Damen nods as Laurent glances around the room for them again, still nowhere in sight.

"And would your brother be upset if I took you home with me?"

"Probably, he'd also be very surprised. I don't go home with strange men." Laurent turns in his chair slightly to look at Damen better, leaning on the bar. "You have an accent. Where are you from?"

"Akielos." He lets his accent roll through with the word.

"Ah, makes sense barbaric country, barbaric man." Damen raises a perfect eyebrow and laughs loudly. Laurent is surprised by Damens laughter, most would get angry when someone slanders their country. 

"You're very opinionated aren't you?" His voice hiding his natural accent again. "Is my country's stereotype going to change your opinion of me?"

"It might if you prove them right." Laurent glances pointedly over at Damen's arms again. Neither of them are drunk at this point, but they are both definitely buzzed. "Your body isn't helping your case."

"Oh? But it seems to be helping me in other ways." His eyes had wandered to Damen’s chest, letting himself soak in the shape of Damen’s muscles. He hadn't realized he was leaning forward until Damen brushes his hair away from his face without needing to reach out anymore. Damen’s eyes are dark and intimidating but he doesn’t scare Laurent at all. Laurent had told Auguste he wouldn't talk to anyone, he can’t imagine what his brother would say if he knew what he was doing now. What he was going to do.

"Ask me to come with you," Laurent says, with a bit of urgency in his tone.

"Will you leave here with me?" He asks. Laurent nods and Damen smiles, grabbing his hand to lead him outside. Laurent looks for Auguste and his friends on last time before they go outside, still not seeing them in the haze of fake fog and dancing bodies, he shoots his brother a quick text. Neither of them drove, but they had too much to drink anyway, so Damen calls an Uber. In the Uber, Damen attempts to grope Laurent, and Laurent has to keep pushing him off.

"Not here, Damen." Damen stops touching Laurent as soon as he is asked but sits close enough to him that their thighs are pressed against each other. Laurent puts his seatbelt on but Damen chooses to stay close to Laurent and not put his on. "You're going to die if we get in a crash."

"So proper even when you're drunk aren't you, Prince Laurent?" He questions, tilting Laurent’s face up to look at him. He tries to lean in for a kiss but they arrive wherever he brought them, Laurent slides out of the Uber, Damen right behind him. Damen takes his hand and drags Laurent into a motel room with him. As soon as the door closes his restraint snaps and kisses him. It takes Laurent a while to kiss back, as he’s never really kissed someone like this before. But when he calms down enough to reciprocate, Damen grabs the back of his hair in his fist to keep control of the situation. He reaches for the top button on Laurent’s shirt but stops himself before he undoes it. “Is this okay? You’re okay with this right?”

“Yes,” Laurent says quietly. He nods and takes his time unbuttoning Laurent’s shirt, giving himself time to stare at Laurent once again. Trying to take some control of the situation, Laurent reaches out to pull at the bottom of Damen’s shirt, Damen leans back and lets Laurent pull it off. His body isn’t much different from how Laurent had pictured it. He’s obviously very strong and could probably break someone Laurent’s size in two if he really wanted to. Laurent takes a second to let his fingers graze over Damen’s chest and feels the rumbles coming from Damen’s laugh.

“Enjoying the view?” Damen asks. Laurent pulls his hand away to step back. Worried he said something wrong, Damen doesn’t make a move forward to close the distance. “You alright?”

Laurent stands motionless for a moment before giving a small nod. He’s never done something like this before and it’s terrifying to be with someone he barely knows. Damen steps forward and gives Laurent a small push, guiding him to lay down on the bed behind him. Laurent allows Damen to lead, doing what he wants because Laurent knows he has more experience with this. Damen is slow and gentle and stops when necessary to make sure Laurent is okay.

After they finish sometime later they lay next to each other slightly more sober than when they started and coated in sweat. Laurent tries to get up, only to be pulled back down onto a solid warm chest.

“What?” Laurent asks turning around to look at Damen. Damen just stares. 

“You don’t need to fuck and run, just lay down, you’re drunk. Let me drive you home in the morning.” Laurent wants to protest, his brother will be freaking out by now no doubt. But Laurent’s eyes begin to feel heavy after hearing the words ‘lay down’. 

This time Laurent follows instructions and falls back in the bed next to Damen as told. He’s stiff and uncomfortable sleeping next to a man he barely knows, ignoring the fact that they just fucked. But he’s tired and it's his only option. One night won’t hurt anyone.

*  
The next morning, Laurent wakes up to the sound of someone talking. His eyes open slowly, glancing around the dark room seeing no one lays next to him in bed. He turns his head to the side and sees Damen standing over by the door like he's trying not to wake him up. He's only wearing a pair of tight black jeans so low on his hips the band of his boxers is visible.

"I'll be there later, why are you so panicked? We'll make it on time I've done this more times than I can remember." He looks back over at Laurent and sees that he’s awake. "I have to go, I'll be there at noon stop worrying." Damen hangs up and puts the phone in his back pocket. He looks over at Laurent and just stares for a while.

"Sorry to interrupt your phone call," Laurent says, not really knowing what to do. He’s trying his best not to shiver but the room is freezing.

"That's alright, I should have been more careful. I didn't mean to wake you." Damen walks over to sit next to Laurent on the bed. His skin is dark, but not as dark as Laurent thought it seemed in the dim lights of the club last night. He’s not had the time to brush his hair this morning so it sits messily on his forehead. Laurent’s cheeks begin to burn as he thinks about how he let this stranger take him back here last night. He doesn’t regret it but it’s not something he normally does. “What’s wrong sweetheart?”

“That was the first time I’ve ever fucked a stranger.” Laurent tries to change his tone to seem less harsh but it feels foreign and strange coming from his mouth. Damen brushes Laurent’s hair out of his eyes when he lets it fall into his face. 

"Yeah, I kind of figured by your attitude and all."

"Bold of you to assume that's why I had an attitude." Damen chuckles at Laurents sassy remark and nods. For once Laurent doesn’t know what else to say so he just holds the blanket up to keep himself covered.

“Would you like me to leave so you can get dressed?” He asks politely. Laurent nods and Damen leaves the room into what Laurent assumes is the bathroom. It doesn’t take long to find his clothes and he’s left waiting for Damen to return. Glancing around the room, Laurent realizes, it looks like someone has been staying here longer than just last night. Damen has clothes piled in the corner and beer bottles on the table. Damen exits the bathroom after checking it’s okay.

"You're not very tidy are you?" Laurent asks, waving his arm to the mess of clothes in the corner, as Damen picks a shirt up off of the floor and slips it on.

"Jesus you're so fucking proper, where the hell did you come from?" He walks over to Laurent and unbuttons the top two buttons of his shirt again. Laurent’s cheeks burn but he keeps eye contact when Damen stares down at him. "Do you want me to take you home now sweetheart?"

"Well, how else do you expect me to get home? Take another Uber? Walk?" He shakes his head and leans down to kiss Laurent’s cheek. When Laurent starts to pull away Damen grabs his wrist and forces Laurent’s body up against his own. This sudden attitude change startled Laurent but he refuses to let Damen see that. When Damen leans down for a kiss the force behind it sends a chill through Laurent’s body. Such a simple gesture makes him react so strongly. 

"You could always stay here with me a little longer." He whispers, letting his fingers run over Laurent’s collarbone.

"I need to get home before my brother sends out search parties." The idea of staying here with Damen and letting him touch Laurent the way he did last night is tempting, but he needs to get home. Auguste is very protective and he will be extremely worried already, he needs to get home soon. 

"Alright sweetheart, whatever you say." Damen’s voice is soft, barely above a whisper, as if someone else might hear them. He grabs Laurent’s hand and leads them outside. A few doors down Laurent sees a man, seemingly drunk, walking towards them but he does his best to ignore him and follows Damen to the car. Laurent is surprised to see how fancy Damen’s car is, the man is living in a motel for christ sake. It is a sleek black Audi, small but still spacious enough to fit a behemoth like Damen. The man himself walks over, dropping Laurent’s hand so he can open the door for Laurent. Laurent keeps his face expressionless. But when Damen gets in the car and the door slams shut he jumps Damen is amused by Laurent’s reaction and doesn’t bother hiding it. He reaches over to brush Laurent’s hair back behind his ear so he can see his face better and Laurent freezes. “You don’t have to be afraid of me, I’m not going to bite, _your highness_ .” 

"I'm not afraid of you. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do, I've never hooked up with anyone before. I don't know the normal customs."

"Okay first off, cool it with the formal talk. There are no customs, you can do whatever you want." Damen says in amusement, Damen does not understand what it’s like to not know what to do in these situations so the lack of finesse is funny to him. Damen stares at Laurent for a while until Laurent eventually nods. Laurent’s cheeks flush but Damen pulls his face towards him so he can kiss Laurent. To take control of the situation he puts his hand on Laurent’s upper thigh and runs it higher. Not knowing what’s going on or how to react, Laurent gasps his hands gripping onto the side of the seat like it is the only thing keeping him on earth. As Damen’s fingers get higher Laurent is snapped out of his daze, he places his and over Damen’s so he stops moving, but Damen doesn’t even flinch when Laurent tightens his hold on his wrist. 

"Why don't we keep this a secret sweetheart?” Damen motions between the two of them for emphasis, “I think we have something special, I don't want to share that with anyone." He whispers. This makes no sense to Laurent, why would he keep them a secret?

“Why does that mean I should keep us a secret?” Wasn’t this just a one time fuck?

“Why share something like this so soon when we don’t know where it’s going to go? People like to add their opinion onto things they don’t need to. I don’t want to lose this because of someone else’s opinion.” He starts to slide his hand again and Laurent nods. Damen is right, Laurent does not want to hear anyone else’s opinion on whatever this is between the two of them. Until Laurent can decide for himself what this is, why tell anyone else? Especially Auguste. 

Damen keeps his lips millimeters away from Laurent’s, Laurent wants to kiss him but he doesn’t have the courage to do it himself. "Now, we better get you back to your brother before he sends out that search party."

"He can wait," Laurent mumbles.

"No, if we don't want anyone to know about us we have to get you home. Tell me what you're not going to do?" He asks, giving Laurent’s thigh a light squeeze.

"Tell anyone about you," Laurent says. He finally gets the courage to lean forward and bring their lips together but Damen notices what he’s doing and pulls back just enough so he can’t reach him. 

"Good boy." He pulls away, taking his hand off of Laurent’s thigh, leaving him sitting there trembling. "Come on, let's get you home."

"So you... want to see me again?" Laurent questions. Damen starts the car and Laurent gives him directions back to his apartment.

"Of course, why do you think I want to keep you a secret?" He says. Laurent assumed he wouldn’t ever want to see him again. He assumed this was a one night stand for Damen as he seems to be the type to do this often, but he actually wants to see him again. Laurent doesn’t know what to say. He never thought someone would want to see him again. Keeping Damen a secret from people still sounds weird to Laurent though. Why shouldn’t he go home and tell Auguste every detail about Damen? Laurent’s mind wanders so far during the car ride that he doesn’t even realize when they pull up outside of his building. “Laurent, are you alright? We’re here.”

"Oh, I'm sorry," He mumbles. He starts to get out of Damen’s car but he can't help but ask. "When-"

"I'll call you as soon as I can, sweetheart." Laurent nods a little and starts to get out but Damen pulls him right back in. "Remember, our little secret okay?"

"Of course." He smiles and drops Laurent’s hand, even if he doesn't understand completely why Damen asked him to keep them a secret, he understands his point so he will. As soon as he closes the car door Damen is gone. His car is around the corner and out of sight before Laurent can even get into the building. He already knows that Auguste is going to be angry with him when he finds out where he’s been all night.

As soon as he opens the door he runs right into Auguste pacing through the room talking on the phone. His hair is a mess and he looks extremely stressed.

"Oh my god, Jord he's here." He hangs up and pulls Laurent into a hug before he can close the door. "I thought something happened to you. Don't scare me like that!"

"I just wanted to have a little fun I'm sorry." He pulls back to look at his little brother like he’s crazy. He forgot Damen unbuttoned his shirt so Auguste looks at his shirt as if there is something wrong.

"I called you a thousand times! I came home this morning and you weren't here. You could have at least told me you were okay!" Auguste yells. "I know, I was the one that convinced you to go out, have a good time, but I did not expect you to leave with someone, and I at least deserved to know where you were."

Keeping his night with Damen a secret feels wrong, but he can't tell Auguste the truth no matter what he says. He made a promise and he’s not going to break that.


	2. Chapter 2

An entire week passes since the day that Laurent hooked up with Damen. He’s gone to work, hung out with Auguste, he’s lived his life just as he should. But the idea of seeing Damen again is at the front of his mind the entire time. He assumed Damen would have called by now, but Laurent isn’t clingy and he can live his life without seeing Damen. It’s Friday night now and he’s coming home from work but all he can think about is Damen. His fingers on Laurent’s skin, his soft lips. Laurent shakes his head, ridding himself of those thoughts, he needs to forget about him. Why waste time thinking about some random man who Laurent had spent one night with when he can be thinking about much more important things. Like taxes or some other adult responsibility.

Laurent walks outside towards his car, but something is wrong. It feels like someone is following him. Maybe he’s just being paranoid but Laurent can feel the hair on his arms rise his skin prickling. Laurent’s shoulders tense up tight, waiting, ready to fight or run like hell. He starts to pull out his phone to call Auguste when an arm wraps around his waist and a hand clamps over his mouth. His phone falls, crashing to the ground. Laurent screams and thrashes in the attacker's grip but the hand does not let up. The leather glove digs deeper into his cheek as he tries to squirm out of their arms. Auguste taught him how to fight but this person is so strong they counter every attempt at escape. 

"Shhh, sweetheart, it's okay it's just me." The attacker sways them back and forth as they hush Laurent. "It's just me, don't scream."

"Damen?" Laurent asks as the grip on his waist and mouth loosen. He spun around to face Damen pissed, prepared to tell him he can shove it, but before Laurent could say anything Damen pulls Laurent’s face to his and kisses him. After they come apart for a breather Laurent takes in Damen’s appearance. Damen is wearing a dark hoodie, with the hood pulled up and strings drawn tight, a baseball cap under that, low so that you couldn’t see his face unless you were to tip it back and look from directly under him. Laurent can’t see his expression, it is unsettling. "Why the hell did you think ambushing me like that was a good idea?" Laurent asks, voice cold. He crosses his arms and stares Damen down, disregarding the fact that Damen has a good five inches or so on him. 

"I'm sorry, I'm here to pick up your highness." Laurent picks up his phone off of the ground and follows him back to his car, albeit hesitantly. He’s annoyed at Damen for sneaking up on him and letting him hang for a whole week with zero contact. But, Laurent admits to himself, he has been desperate to see Damen, and he isn’t about to this opportunity. 

"And where do you plan on taking me?" Laurent asks, as they walk over to Damen’s car, conveniently parked right next to Laurents own. Did Damen do that on purpose? But how would he know what car is Laurent’s? Laurent is suspicious but he lets it go, for now, thinking it a coincidence.. 

"It’s a surprise." Damen opens the car door for Laurent, then closes it after him. Laurent has barely glanced at Damen the whole time, afraid that if he does Damen will see how eager Laurent is to see him. He has no idea how Damen knows where he works, maybe he told him at some point but he doesn’t remember. Laurent is too flustered and pissed off right now to worry about asking either. The anger he has for how Damen grabbed him and the excitement of seeing him again is a confusing mix of emotions. 

"So you just are going to show up, out of nowhere, and think I’ll just go along with you no questions asked? How do you know I didn't have plans tonight?" Damen just smiles and takes his gloves off. Finally, he pulls his hood down and tosses his hat in the backseat so his face is now visible to Laurent.

"Call and cancel them if you do."

"What makes you think you're more important." He sits up straight and glances over at Damen. "Entitled brute."

"You can't tell me you haven't been thinking about me this week _sweetheart_. You were all that was on my mind." Damen smiles when he glances over, sees Laurent staring back at him coldly. Laurent doesn’t bother to reply to Damen but he does text Auguste that he will be home late tonight. Laurent didn’t have any plans but he’s pissed Damen didn’t even ask. Damen is right though, Laurent hasn’t been able to stop thinking about him. He makes Laurent nervous, but anyone else be damned, Laurent wants to enjoy these new experiences and feelings that most people don’t think twice about. This isn’t something Laurent is an expert at, every little thing seems like a big deal. Damen reaches over to touch Laurent’s hand but Laurent jumps at the contact. "Are you afraid of me? I'm not going to hurt you, sweetheart."

"I'm not afraid of you." Laurent spits back. He jumped because he was surprised not because he was scared.

"I would never hurt my beautiful prince." He reaches over to run his hand over Laurent’s knee reassuringly. It doesn’t matter if he says he doesn’t want to hurt Laurent if he still makes him nervous. There’s something different about him and Laurent can’t figure it out, that annoys him. “Your Highness, you’re shaking.”

“When a man pretends to kidnap you, it tends to bring out a little adrenaline, sweetheart.” Laurent manages to say back. Damen just laughs and shakes his head, he thinks what he did was funny. They pull up outside the same motel they were at last time and Laurent finally takes a second to look around. The motel itself doesn't seem to run down but the questionable looking people loitering outside makes it seem like it is. Directly across from the motel on the other side of the parking lot is a little forest that is more like a group of trees than an actual forest. On both sides of the parking lot are roads that are never very busy. Damen hurries around to get Laurent’s door for him and takes his hand as soon as he steps out. When a woman tries to get Damen’s attention Laurent holds his hand tighter, staring at her as Damen ignores her entirely. 

“Be nice Laurent.” Damen mutters when he sees Laurent glaring at the girl. Laurent can feel his cheeks heating up, he hoped Damen wouldn't notice, but Damen finds it cute. Getting jealous of other people when they barely know each other. Laurent’s pride almost gets the best of him but he ignores it and keeps his hand in Damen’s. The woman gets the hint and huffs when she notices Laurent staring and how Damen refuses to even look up at her. 

"I'm not doing anything," Laurent defends. Damen unlocks the door and leads him inside before anyone else can try and talk to him. As soon as Damen closes the door behind them Laurent drops his hand and puts a few steps between them.

"I'm not blind you know." Damen says with a smirk. The bed right inside the door is just as unmade and messy as it was last time Laurent was here. Across from that is a dresser with a TV on it. In the corner, there's a small table barely big enough for two people and a small kitchen next to it. It's really just a counter with a stove and mini-fridge but it's just as messy as the rest of the room. A chair from the table is pushed over against the wall almost blocking the door Laurent to the bathroom. Laurent’s brought back from his assessment of the room when Damen harshly pulls him by the tie. "It's fine though, it's very flattering you were jealous."

"I wasn't jealous." He loosens Laurent’s tie and unbuttons the top buttons of his shirt, just like on the first day they met. He uses the tie to hold Laurent near him when he tries to step away. "What's up with you always unbuttoning my shirt? It’s buttoned for a reason."

"You don’t even need to wear a shirt when you're around me. But I don't know if a prince such as yourself is comfortable with that yet." He leans down and lightly kisses Laurent, leaving him desperate for more when he pulls away.

“Sticking with that ridiculous nickname then I guess?” Damen smiles nodding, Laurent just rolls his eyes. _Prince_ , it’s a ridiculous nickname, it makes him seem like a stuck up asshole. He is, but that is beside the point.

“When you stop looking and acting like one, I’ll stop using it.”

“I do not act like one.” Laurent snaps. 

“Well you look like one then.” Damen drops Laurent’s tie and moves down to grab his hand again. “Can’t deny me on that.”

“Fuck off.” Laurent mumbles. He tries to step away but Damen pulls him right back so he can keep talking. 

"I need to make a phone call. When I come back we can talk about where we're going to go tonight." He mumbles quietly.

"Alright," He lets go of Laurent’s hand and goes back outside.

Now that he’s here again, he’s fairly sure he was right to assume Damen lives here. There’s a shirt thrown on the floor and a coat laying over the back of the chair. But the clothes that had been piled on the floor before are now picked up. The amount of stuff here though is still too much to be just for a few days. 

On the table, there’s a green bag unzipped overflowing with its contents. Some clothes that Damen probably just picked up off of the floor, a small wooden box, and a few other things lay half spilled out over the table and down onto the chair. Peeking out of the top is something Laurent can’t quite see from where he’s standing but it grabs his interest enough to stare. After a few minutes, Laurent can’t help his curiosity as to what’s in the bag and decides to investigate. His hand just reaches in as Damen walks back inside. 

"So do you want to-" He slams the door shut and grabs Laurent by the waist, spinning him around away from the bag. He's too late though because Laurent already saw what was inside. Right on top of his clothes, there are a few small bags of white powder. If Laurent were to continue looking through the bag he would have found much more than the tiny bags he did. Even though Laurent’s older brother is a cop and sees this type of thing all the time Laurent had never seen drugs before and has no idea what this powder is. Damen stares at him with a blank expression but Laurent seems nervous. "You're not supposed to be looking through my stuff."

"So you..." Laurent’s heart is racing. Was he right to be afraid of Damen? Laurent is disgusted by drugs, his brother is a cop he’s not going to get himself involved with an addict. Auguste would have a hard time forgiving Laurent for that. Damen looks over Laurent’s eyes and smirks when he notices the fear. 

“I sell, I only use every once in a while,” Damen doesn’t seem upset at all about what Laurent found, he just waits to see the reaction he’s going to get. Laurent has no idea if he should be angry or scared. This isn’t something he can go along with, Auguste would kill him if he ever found out. Auguste would expect Laurent to tell him about Damen if he knew about this. Damen brushes away the hair that fell into Laurent’s eyes and uses it to tilt his face up to look at him when Laurent tries to look away. “Laurent, are you scared?”

“Am I supposed to be?” Laurent asks. Even if this is what Damen does, for some reason Laurent doesn’t feel any different about him. Laurent still wants him, even though the idea of upsetting Auguste kills him. 

"You don't know?" Damen questions.

"The drugs don't scare me." Laurent says. Damen looks shocked for a second but it quickly contorts into a smile.

"And what, I do? Am I scary sweetheart?" Laurent takes a step back when Damen leans his face down close to him. He isn’t afraid of Damen but he doesn’t want to kiss him right now. 

"Upsetting my brother scares me. You're not very frightening, Damen." He grabs both of Laurent’s hands suddenly and holds them behind his back. He starts to fight but Damen leans him against the table to kiss him and he stops trying to pull away.

"If your brother never hears about me, he can't be upset." Damen whispers to him. His lip brushes against Laurent’s ear and he shudders.

"What's in the bags?" Laurent mumbles back to him. He smiles and spins Laurent around to face the table. "If I'm going to upset my brother I'd like to know what it is first."

"You sure you want to know? Your brother Auguste is a cop. I wouldn't want to get you in any trouble."

"How did you know that?" Laurent never told him what Auguste does or his name. The only thing Damen knew about Auguste is that he gets overprotective of Laurent.

"I know a lot of things sweetheart." He reaches into the bag and grabs one of the bags of white powder. Laurent flinches when Damen holds it close to his face like somehow he might hurt him with it. "It's cocaine."

"Oh, I guess a barbaric Akielon would have coke," He pulls Laurent closer to his chest and Laurent jumps. Damen’s chest pressed against his back suddenly sends a wave of fear through him. He doesn’t want to be touched, he doesn’t want to be near Damen anymore. It’s not a fear of anything that Damen is doing but just unbearable panic that Laurent can’t control. Damen, oblivious to what is going through Laurent’s mind, kisses the top of Laurent’s head and gets shoved away.

“Laurent, it’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you, I’m not a bad person.” Damen reaches out for his hand but Laurent pulls it away. He takes a deep breath to calm himself down before he tries to talk to Laurent again. "Although, If you go and tell on me then I might."

"You're a drug dealer." Laurent spits.

"Yeah, I think we're past that now. Look, I'm not going to hurt you. You don't have to leave." He mutters to Laurent. He's charming as always, of course, but Laurent doesn't think he wants to stay here any longer tonight. Laurent reaches out and grabs the bag from his hand, Damen seems shocked but he lets him hold it.

“Let me see.”

"I'll let you try some if you want." Damen says, wrapping an arm around Laurent’s upper chest to hold him there. Even if Laurent wants to fight him, he knows it’s best to stay still right now. “No charge.”

"No, I don't want that." Laurent spits back. Damen chuckles a little and takes the bag back from him so he can put it away. 

"Alright." Damen smiles and tries to kiss Laurent but he steps away. "Did I do something wrong?"

"I need to go home,” Laurent says, “This is a lot, I think I should leave."

"I'm sorry if I scared you, Laurent, I didn't mean for you to find out this way."

"Can you please just take me back to my car?" Laurent asks, stepping away from Damen when he tries to touch him again. Damen sighs and opens the door for him. He slams the door shut behind them and curses quietly to himself on the way out. The woman avoids Damen this time, hurrying further away when she sees the look on his face. Laurent didn't want to upset him but he’s overwhelmed and needs to be away from everything right now. "I didn't mean to upset you, Damen."

"I'm not upset with you." He says, sighing again. He stares straight ahead of himself for a while so that he doesn’t have to look at Laurent but as he talks he eventually gives in and glances over. "I understand why you're uncomfortable. I'm just angry with myself for leaving that bag out where you could see everything, I just didn't expect you to look through my stuff."

"I'm overwhelmed," Laurent admits to him. “This is a lot, I need a while to calm down. I don’t think I can do this, I’m not going to upset my brother for an Akielon. Come to see me again soon and I'll tell you if I'll see you again."

Damen smiles and nods. Laurent does like Damen a lot, he's full of himself and does something that Laurent finds repulsive but he likes him. He’s sweet to Laurent and understanding whenever Laurent needs something. Laurent wants to try and look past it so he can still see him, even if that means hiding it from Auguste.


	3. Chapter 3

“Why are you doing this?” The man under Damen’s knife cries out. Damen met him at a bar, it was an impulsive decision that brought the two of them here tonight. It was easy enough convincing the boy to ‘come home’ with Damen. He didn’t even have to learn the boy’s name. All it took was a few drinks to have him wrapped around Damen’s finger. Such a desperate boy, just barely old enough to be in that bar and Damen gets him all to himself. This really isn’t about the boy anyways, everything that Damen has done in this past week has been about Laurent. They’ve known each other for eleven days and Damen is already so head over heels for him that he needs to kill. This was never about this desperate boy, this is about Damen’s lack of self-control. This boy just decided to flirt with him on the wrong night. His sobs started out quiet but grow louder and louder as Damen drags this on. “What did I do to you?”

“Nothing, you just talked to me on the wrong night sweetheart.” His crying is the most irritating sound Damen could imagine, he’s never disliked it so much. It makes his skin crawl and his head ache with ever scream. The act of killing has always been fun for him, especially listening to them beg, but this isn’t what Damen wants it to be. He is nothing like what Damen imagines Laurent will be like and that is ruining what this is supposed to be for him. He tries to muffle his screams with a torn piece of cloth but the screams are just so annoying he can’t keep doing this. “Fuck, just shut up already.”

In one quick motion, Damen drags the knife across the boy’s neck. Blood pours out of his neck and all over Damen’s shirt and chest. It takes seconds for the life to drain from the boy’s eyes and for him to finally fall still. Damen walks outside right away to get himself away from the boy, giving himself no time to admire the work he had done. He drops the knife in a bucket of water outside and takes a second to breathe. The blood is sticky and hot as it drips down from his fingertips and into the dirt outside, he’ll have to remember to clean that up. He was supposed to get all of his anger out on this boy so he can have the strength to stay with Laurent longer. But all this did was make him even angrier. One month is the normal amount of time he spends with a person before he kills them. How can he already feel like this after only eleven days?

It’s all too overwhelming for Damen right now, he needs to see Laurent. He doesn’t care how risky it is to see him when he feels like this. Dumping this kid’s body won’t take long, but cleaning up the blood will. He’s completely covered in it and it’s all over the floor around him. Scrubbing the floors, rinsing off the blood on his skin, burning his bloody clothes, even cleaning the boy so there is no chance of Damen’s DNA on him. This all needs to happen quickly though, he needs to see Laurent tonight.  
*  
In the past week, Damen has been sort of stalking both Laurent and Auguste. Damen knew it was going to be hard to get Laurent to tell him about where he lives and such, so he just figured it out himself. Damen silently slips through Laurent’s window and stops. He can hear Auguste talking in the other room and the door is open far enough that he could see Damen if he walked by. If he doesn’t want to be seen, he can’t stay here. But suddenly the door to Laurent’s bathroom opens and he walks out, a stroke of good luck. 

“My Prince,” Laurent gasps and spins around to see Damen crouched down by the window. He looks terrified for a second but that quickly fades into the beginning of a smile that he attempts to hide as he realizes who's actually in his room. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” He asks. It’s obvious he’s nervous about Damen being here when he takes a few steps away as Damen makes his way closer. Before Laurent can say anything Damen grabs his shirt and pulls him into a kiss, holding onto him so that he can’t pull away. Laurent’s back is pressed against the door frame to his bathroom with Damen’s body pinning him there. Eventually, as Laurent gets more comfortable, his fingers make their way up to the side of Damen’s face. 

“Have you thought it over yet?” Damen asks. Laurent just stands there for a minute as if he has no idea what to do. He seems so confused and afraid and it makes Damen feel so good. "I saw you tried to call me, I'd prefer if you let me call you first."

“Damen-” He starts talking loud enough that Auguste might be able to hear so Damen covers his mouth and signals him to be quiet. Laurent looks offended that he’d cover his mouth but he doesn’t fight it. 

“Do not let him know that I’m here,” Damen whispers. Laurent nods and pulls him back into the bathroom so they can talk. 

“First off, how the fuck did you get into my room?” He spits back, his voice is quiet like Damen asked but he looks annoyed. He crosses his arms over his chest and stands back from Damen.

“Your window isn’t locked,” Damen says, being rewarded with an eye roll from Laurent. 

“I mean how do you know where my room is?”

“I know lots of things,” Damen still refuses to give a real answer. Laurent doesn’t need to know why he knows the things he does, not right now at least. He doesn’t need to know how Damen’s been watching his every move for the eleven days since they met. Laurent glares at Damen but he nods again, he wants a better answer but there’s something else on his mind right now. “I wanted to see you.”

“I’m watching a movie with Auguste, I can’t stay here with you,” Laurent says. This was not part of the plan. “Ask before you come over next time and see if I’m busy. You need to leave before he sees you.”

“Who’s your brother talking to out there?”

“He’s probably on the phone, no one else is here.” Good, another stroke of good luck, Damen can’t risk anyone else being here.

“Fine, go finish your movie and then come back in here with me,” Damen says, shoving Laurent out into the bedroom. He stops and stares back at Damen for a second but Damen motions for him to leave and he does as directed. When he walks out of the room, he leaves the bedroom cracked open just enough that Damen can see out and they will most likely not notice him. Damen glances out and sees Auguste sitting on the couch so all he would have to do is turn his head to the side to see Damen. He’s relaxed with an arm thrown over the back of the couch and his feet propped up on the coffee table in front of him. In the days after Damen met Laurent, he spent time trying to learn more about Auguste. Auguste has been investigating his murders. The names of the people Damen’s killed are something Auguste looks at almost daily. His room is filled with notes on the people Damen’s killed. It was a strange experience for Damen to see someone so obsessive over the people he kills. It was almost just as strange when he thought about how strange it was for Auguste to have all of this information in his room. 

"You ready to finish?" Auguste asks when Laurent sits down in a chair.

"Yeah, sorry." This is the first time Damen has seen Laurent look relaxed with the way he holds himself. He sits with one of his knees pulled up to his chest and the other lazily thrown over the arm of the chair. Even if he still wears the formal clothes that he always does, his hair is pulled up into a bun and his shoulders hold less of the tension than they usually do. He even left a few of the buttons on his shirt undone like Damen put them before, instead of buttoned up all the way to his neck. 

Watching Laurent out there drives Damen crazy. If he wanted to, he could go out there and shoot both of them right now. They wouldn’t see it coming, they’d have no time to react. But he can’t do that, he needs to be patient. Patience is what will help him get away with the murder. Patience will let him keep this game going, if he killed them now he could get caught and that’s not what he wants. How many people can Damen murder before he goes crazy? Most people would have lost it after the first, but not him. He has killed tons, but only twelve have been like Laurent. Just an innocent boy who thinks he found a bad boy who likes him.

Number thirteen needs to be special though. Damen needs different, he’s starting to get sloppy. He needs to pace himself this time. To actually make Laurent, the harsh and formal boy that barely lets himself be touched without giving an attitude, fall for Damen will be a challenge. And to kill Laurent with Auguste investigating his killings might be fun, watching Auguste realize he let his baby brother get murdered right under his nose by the murderer he’s been trying to find. Damen knew there was something he should worry about the first time he heard about Auguste. He’s the only thing standing in the way of killing Laurent. 

He needs to distract himself in here or he might just give in to the temptation. He can’t make any calls because that would risk Auguste hearing him, he needs to find something silent to focus on. He glances around the room, making a mental note of the layout of the room for future reference. Laurent’s bedroom is just as severe as he is. His bed is perfectly made in white sheets and nothing seems out of place in the whole room. A large bookshelf stands on the wall next to the bathroom filled with different classic novels. Damen tosses his jacket on the floor by the window and grabs a random book from the bookshelf. He needs to relax so he lays out on the bed and takes a few breaths. There’s no way he can focus enough to read right now, but staring at the words gives him something else to focus on. Damen doesn’t know how long he sits staring at the book without reading it before he can hear Laurent and his brother start talking. 

“Where are you going?” Auguste asks. This is it, he’s coming back to his room and Damen still hasn’t calmed down from the murder earlier. 

“Sorry, I’m tired. I think I’m going to go to bed, goodnight.” The door swings open but he quickly pulls it back shut when Auguste stands up. 

“Are you okay?” Auguste asks when he walks closer to Laurent. Damen is on edge waiting for Auguste to open the door and walk in on him. If he finds out about Damen then there’s no way Damen can stop himself. “You look like you don’t feel well.”

“Yeah, I’m fine I just need some sleep. Don’t worry Aug,” Laurent hurries back in the room and shuts the door behind him. He leans back against the door and stares at Damen. “I thought I told you to go home. I already feel like shit for lying to him.”

“Don’t feel bad sweetheart, you’re doing it so we can be together. Imagine what Auguste would say if he knew you were talking to a drug dealer.” Damen says. Laurent glares and slowly sits down next to him. Laurent doesn’t know if he wants to see Damen still, he’s a drug dealer and there is no reason that Laurent should get himself involved in that. But if he doesn’t keep this a secret then he won’t get to decide that for himself when Auguste realizes who Damen is. Damen turns Laurent’s chin to look at him and holds it there when he tries to look away. They are so close Damen could have his knife to Laurent’s throat in seconds if he wanted to. “Are you still overwhelmed?”

“Don’t you think I would have put a little more effort into kicking you out if I was overwhelmed?” Laurent says, seeming a little more relaxed. He smiles and moves further onto the bed and closer to Damen. Two feet away from Damen’s knife and he still can’t kill him. He looks more comfortable around Damen than he has before with his legs crossed, leaning back on his arm behind him. Even if he seems more relaxed, the tension in his shoulders is visible again. "I see you looked through my bookshelf, what are you reading?"

“Hamlet,” It takes Damen a minute to respond. Laurent is so calm while Damen fights the urge to slit Laurent’s throat. Four inches away from Damen’s knife now and he has to steady his breathing to keep calm. This is the first time a boy has taken Damen’s breath away by just sitting near him. The usual calm and collected persona Damen has in front of people completely melts away in the presence of Laurent. 

“So the brute likes literature?” Laurent asks. Damen gives a small nod and looks back down at the book, searching for something to focus on instead of Laurent. “What changed your mind about me?”

“What do you mean?” Damen asks. His feelings towards Laurent have not changed from the first time they spoke. He liked Laurent when he saw him from across the room, he likes him when the first thing that came out of Laurent’s mouth was to criticize Damen, it would take a lot to change his opinion about Laurent. He leans past Laurent and puts the book down on the bedside table, no need to pretend to read anymore. One inch away from the knife now, if he shifts over just a little it will be pressed against Laurent’s thigh. It’s now that Damen curses himself for not putting it in his jacket pocket instead of his jeans. At least then it would be on the other side of the room and not tempting Damen’s hand to rip open that perfect skin of Laurent’s neck. With his current posture, Laurent’s neck is fully exposed to Damen causing him to need to take another deep breath before he can continue. Laurent asked a question, Damen needs to listen. 

“I called you back yesterday and you ignored it. With the way I reacted I assumed you would be done with me.” Laurent turns his head away in embarrassment. He’s shy with these things and Damen finds it very attractive to watch him be so uncomfortable. Damen settles back in his spot, so the knife is now further away from Laurent. 

“I’m sorry, I was very busy yesterday. I’d prefer if you wait for me to call you alright?” Laurent tilts his head in confusion but doesn’t disagree. The phone that Laurent can call may not be under Damen’s name but he still worries about making to many calls to him. Laurent’s call history is something they will investigate after he’s killed so Damen needs to be careful.

“Strange request but that’s fine,” He says. Laurent stares over at Damen for a second but suddenly sits up straight. “You know I have work in the morning, and my brother’s room is next door. If you came here thinking you could fuck me then you’re wrong.”

“I came here to see you, not to fuck.” Damen doesn’t understand why he suddenly seems so uncomfortable. “Laurent, we don’t have to fuck whenever you don’t want to you know that right?”

"I know that." He spits back. He tries too hard to conceal how vulnerable he feels and it shows very strongly on him so he tries to change the subject. "I have to work in the morning, I can't stay up all night talking."

"Then take off those clothes and get some rest, I can still sit with you for a while." It takes him a while to agree but eventually, he stands up and awkwardly unbuttons his shirt. Damen leans back to watch him even when Laurent rolls his eyes and glares. He discards the shirt in a basket by his bathroom along with his pants as he slips those off too. He replaces this with a navy colored shirt that’s slightly big him and lets down his hair so it lays softly at his shoulders. Damen is so lost in watching him undress that the sound of Laurent’s voice makes him jump. 

“You have a habit of staring.” He mutters, climbing in bed and wrapping up with the blankets. 

“Why wouldn’t I stare? I don’t deny myself the pleasures of staring at attractive men.” Damen says, being rewarded with an eye roll in return. “You’re not used to anyone looking at you like this are you?”

“‘Like this’?” Laurent questions. 

“As someone who is very attracted to you, and someone who would gladly have you anytime you asked.”

"I'm not a virgin if that's what you're implying." He spits back, sitting up straight and letting the blankets fall away from him. “But I don’t make a habit of letting strange men come into my room just to watch me undress.”

“When was the last time you were with someone?” Laurent’s cheeks flush slightly but he doesn’t seem embarrassed. 

“That’s not the point here,” Laurent says. Damen meant no insult with this question. He was just curious but out of all the questions he has asked Laurent, this one seems to make him the most annoyed. 

"We can talk about this a different day, why don't you get some sleep." Damen slides over slightly to lay down next to Laurent. It startles Laurent enough to jump and sit up for a minute and watch Damen. But eventually, he can tell Damen doesn’t plan on moving so he hesitantly lays back down next to him. They barely know each other and Damen just broke into Laurent’s room to lay in his bed. It takes a lot of trust for Laurent not to tell Auguste about Damen and that’s exactly what Damen is going for. Trust, that’s what these relationships are made of. If he trusts Damen then the betrayal in his eyes makes it so much better later on. Now the only thing that separates Laurent from the knife is the fabric of Damen’s pocket and the bedsheets.

"You don't look very comfortable," Laurent mutters. Damen still sits up slightly so he can look down at Laurent to talk. 

“I’m alright sweetheart, just go to sleep,” Damen sits back slightly to not stare directly at Laurent as he tries to sleep. The thought of taking Laurent away tonight to kill him is still at the front of Damen’s mind with every little move he makes. But Damen isn’t good at concealing his attraction when it comes to Laurent since he has to fight the urge to smile every few seconds. 

“You’re so damn annoying just do it if you’re going to do it.” Damen is left confused momentarily until Laurent pulls Damen’s face down to meet his. Laurent’s kisses are soft but purposeful, he knows exactly what he wants and takes it. There’s a sense of hesitation in it though as both of them wait for the other to take control of the situation. But Laurent initiated this and Damen is going to make him decide what’s next. When Laurent catches on to Damen’s plan he reaches up to run his fingers over Damen’s cheek and control what he does. His other hand runs up Damen’s arm and over the muscles, testing at first but then cautiously feeling. But when Damen’s hands start to wander, Laurent pulls away. “My, my, your highness, you are looking very beautiful tonight.”

"Control yourself, Damen, I’m still not fucking you." 

“And I already told you that’s not why I’m here.” Damen sits back up and leans away. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy the view.” 

“Whatever gets you off I guess.” 

"I should probably leave so you can get some sleep." He says, already leaning over Laurent again. 

"That would probably be for the best." He mumbles. It’s been hours now since Damen killed that boy tonight, and he still hasn’t come back down from it. 

“I’ll see you again soon?” Damen asks. Laurent gives a half smile and nods his head. When Damen walks over to the window for his jacket, he watches as Laurent slips out of bed and follows along behind. Damen isn’t paying much attention to what Laurent is doing so that is probably why he’s caught off guard as Laurent grabs the front of his jacket to hold him still. Damen freezes under his touch, Laurent’s hand is agonizingly close to the gun in his inside pocket. He fears even taking a deep breath because if Laurent finds out he had a gun he could panic and Damen is going to react poorly. 

"Are you going to ignore me for a few days again?" He asks bitterly. His hands drop back down to his sides and he steps back. His hips are slender, his boxers hug the curves of his legs. His hands may be away from the gun now but the sight of him like this still sends Damen’s heart racing. “Did you forget how to speak?”

"We'll see, I'll try to come see you soon." Damen hurries out the window and down the fire escape he came up earlier before Laurent has the chance to mess with his head anymore. He can’t go outside the front door because the Auguste will see him, the fire escape seemed like the best option earlier. But his heart is racing and his mind is so clouded now that more than once someone saw him through their window. This is not how you get away with murder.


	4. Chapter 4

Almost every day since Damen showed up in Laurent’s bedroom they have gone back to his motel. He picks Laurent up after work, they go back to his motel, and Laurent goes home late sometimes with messy hair and never a good excuse to tell Auguste. Auguste has ideas about what Laurent is doing and he’s not sure how he’s supposed to feel about it. One night when Laurent came home well past midnight Auguste was waiting up for him. He was upset that Laurent wouldn’t tell him where he was going and that he came home smelling like beer. Laurent never drank when he went to Damen’s but Damen did on occasion, that night was when Laurent accidentally spilled some of Damen’s drink on his shirt. Auguste can’t boss his brother around but that doesn’t mean he can’t worry. Laurent has never done anything like this before and he knew that Auguste was just worried about him. When he was younger he used to act out when something was wrong instead of talking about it, so now even though he’s older Auguste gets worried when Laurent does anything different. But Laurent is having fun with Damen and Auguste bothering him about it all the time is getting old.

That night, Laurent stayed late at work to get some stuff done so they got back to Damen’s motel later than normal. Laurent wasn’t really in the mood for socializing after an annoying day at work. But after dinner and a few hours of company spent together, Laurent’s attitude calmed down tremendously. So now it’s well past midnight and Damen and Laurent are still laying under the bedsheets. Their clothes are spread across the floor all around them. Laurent rolls out of bed and hurries over to the bathroom to get a wet cloth to clean himself off. 

“You know, you’re very attentive for someone with an attitude like yours,” Damen says as Laurent comes back out to clean Damen up with the damp towel. It’s a gesture that Damen found sweet so he let Laurent go on cleaning up if that’s what he wanted to do. But when Damen’s had enough he takes the towel out of his hand and tosses it through the bathroom doorway and onto the floor somewhere.

“I was going to put that where it belongs,” Laurent says with a roll of the eyes.

“I put it where it belongs, it’s in the bathroom isn’t it?” Damen jokes. “I’ll pick it up later, stop worrying so much.”

“Idiot,” Laurent mumbles under his breath as he crawls under the bedsheets. While Laurent keeps the sheets pulled up covering himself, Damen lays with the sheets just barely covering his waist. A few minutes of uncomfortable silence passes over the two of them. Laurent stares off at a mess Damen has piled up on the kitchen counter but when he turns his head to the side he sees Damen gazing back at him. Damen sighs and slides out of bed so Laurent looks back to the mess. When Laurent looks back up at Damen a moment later he’s standing by the window wearing only his boxers. 

“I’ll take you back later sweetheart, stay here with me for a while.” He says. Damen turns back around and stares at Laurent as he tries to grab his clothes from the spot under the warm blankets. Damen likes to keep the room cold so while he feels comfortable walking around in just his underwear Laurent freezes even under the blankets. 

“I don’t want to go home yet anyway, Auguste’s going to try and lecture me again.” Laurent slips his boxers back on and slips back under the blankets when Damen picks up the rest of his clothes and holds them away from him. Laurent knows if he goes over there to get them Damen wouldn’t give them up. 

"You can stay here if you want." He says.

“Really?” Laurent wasn’t expecting to hear that from him. 

"Yeah, I mean just for tonight though. We probably shouldn’t do it again if we don't want to get caught."

“I don’t know, seems a little early to be spending the night with you,” Damen smirks to himself and lays Laurent’s clothes over the back of a chair. 

“You spent the night the first time we met.” He says, leaning back against the wall near the door.

“That was different.” Laurent defends. 

“Not really. Come on, just stay the night with me.” Damen says. “I’ll buy you whatever you need tonight if that’s what the problem is.”

"I have to work in the morning, I can't," Laurent says. Damen picks up a bag from off of the floor and digs through it, ignoring what Laurent said for a moment. He pauses for a while as he looks for what he wants, tossing random things he doesn’t need out onto the floor causing Laurent to cringe in disgust. This is a disgusting habit of Damen’s that Laurent will have to break if they plan on seeing each other for longer than this. Living in this clutter would stress Laurent out of his mind. 

“Why don’t you just stay with me tomorrow?” Damen finds a plain black shirt from his bag and tosses the bag on the floor so he can bring the shirt to Laurent. Laurent sits up enough that Damen can slip it on him. The shirt is big on Laurent but he feels a little warmer in it. "You said if you go home Auguste is going to lecture you. I'll stay here with you tomorrow if you'd like, and I'll take you home whenever you decide you want to leave."

"You would do that?" Laurent asks. Damen nods to Laurent and sits down in bed again. 

"Only for my beautiful prince." Damen grabs Laurent by his waist and pulls him over into his lap. Unsure of Damen’s intentions Laurent watches his movements closely until he realizes Damen isn’t doing anything. So, Laurent puts his hands on Damen’s shoulders, carefully running his fingertips down his chest. “It’s been a long day for both of us, making you happy for tonight would be an honor.”

“Thank you,” Laurent says, barely above a whisper. Staying here overnight again makes him nervous. He has a hard time trusting Damen and being near him for even a few hours, overnight seems impossible. But Damen wants him to stay and he really wants to spend time with him. Eventually, he’s going to have to learn how to relax around Damen.

“Do you mind?” Damen asks, holding up a lighter and bringing Laurent back from his thoughts. 

“If you must,” Laurent drops his eyes from Damen’s face again and down to his chest where his fingers still sit. He hates smoking, but he can tolerate his disgusting habit just this once. He watches Damen’s muscles tense and relax as he reaches around to grab what he needs. Damen lifts his hips up slightly to readjust so he doesn’t have to sit up so straight. The room is freezing so Laurent still feels cold but under his hands, Damen’s chest is almost hot to the touch. Laurent is only brought back from his thoughts when he begins to smell the smoke. “That’s not a cigarette.”

“You’re right, it’s not.” Damen smiles and holds it out for him. Why didn’t Laurent realize it before? This is not something that he feels comfortable with at all. “Did you want to try sweetheart?”

“I shouldn’t,” Laurent starts to back away, but Damen wraps his arm around his waist to hold him there. 

"Why? Because your big brother will be upset? Who cares what he thinks. He's not here right now and he won't know if you're staying here with me tonight like you said." Damen pulls him closer, so the joint is inches from Laurent’s lips. “Just try.”

“Auguste would kill me.”

“Why? It’s just weed.” Damen raises an eyebrow in confusion at me and takes another drag. Damen turns his head to blow out smoke away from Laurent’s face but the smell is still strong and makes his eyes water. “Weed isn’t a big deal.”

“That doesn’t really matter, there’s been addiction in my family, my brother is against it and so am I,” Laurent says, but gives in and lets Damen put the joint between his lips. He breathes in a puff of smoke but quickly pulls it away coughing. 

“You don’t seem too against it now.” Damen laughs. 

"I don't know if I like that." They both laugh a little as Damen takes it back. 

“I thought you’d say that,” Damen pulls Laurent down to lay on Damen’s chest as he shifts the two of them to lay almost flat, keeping one arm loosely draped over his back. This has all been very overwhelming for Laurent but he fights to make sure Damen doesn’t catch on to that. He is nervous and struggles to know how to act around Damen on a normal day and this isn’t helping with that. “Thanks for trying it.”

“Shut up,” Laurent mumbles. It’s been such a long day he closes his eyes to try and relax for just a moment. Only the sound of Laurent’s phone ringing brings him back to the room. 

“You’d better answer that sweetheart,” Damen says. Laurent just grunts and ignores him so Damen has to lift him off of his chest and hands him his phone, all while keeping Laurent sat in his lap. With a roll of his eyes, Laurent takes the phone and Damen sits back to watch. 

“Where are you?” Auguste asks when he answers. 

“Out, I’ll be back sometime tomorrow,” Laurent says. Damen shifts Laurent in his lap so they are closer but Damen doesn’t have to move. He sticks the joint between Laurent’s lips again and waits for him to take another hit. This time Laurent doesn’t cough but pulling the phone away from his face for a second just in case. “You don’t need to call and check up on me.” 

“You’ve just been acting really strange lately. Are you okay?” Auguste questions. Ashes fall onto the bed next to Laurent’s leg when Damen pulls it away from him. Damen leans over and puts out the burning remains, steadying Laurent so he doesn’t move. “If you’re seeing someone I’d like to meet them so I know you’re safe.”

“I’m safe, you need to stop. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Auguste.” Laurent hangs up the phone before Auguste has the chance to say anything else. He’s too nervous about saying something wrong right now for that phone call to continue any longer. 

“Good job, sweetheart,” Damen says. Laurent tries to fight past how cloudy his mind feels while Damen seems just as clear as he’s ever been. “You feel alright?”

"I've never smoked before." He tosses his phone over on the bedside table. 

"I can tell." He laughs when Laurent leans into his touch. “So tell me about this addiction in your family, what scares you so much about it?”

“It doesn’t scare me, but I know what it can do and I don’t care to fuck around with that. But it was my mom. I was really young I don’t know much about it, but she’s dead now so it was obviously pretty bad.” Laurent pauses for a second when Damen reaches up to hold Laurent’s cheek in his hand. He leans into the touch and sighs in content before continuing. “My brother went through a lot back then trying to help my father with her. If I ever did that to them, it would break Auguste.”

“But not your father?” Damen questions. 

“He’s dead so no, probably wouldn’t disappoint him too much.” Damen looks shocked for a second at how casual Laurent brings it up. “Why are you looking at me like that? He was a cop like Auguste, and he was shot. It was a long time ago, I was still a kid it’s not a big deal.” 

“Laurent, I’m sorry,” Damen says softly. “Where did you live when they died?”

“With my uncle for a few years until I could move in with Auguste.” Damen runs his hands over Laurent’s sides to comfort him, not realizing that Laurent doesn’t need comforting. He’s had plenty of time to cope with it, their deaths are practically just a story to tell. He was never close to his parent and Auguste raised him for most of his life so he feels no lasting connection with them. However, this gesture, that was supposed to be comforting, sends chills and panic through Laurent’s body. This reaction that he could normally conceal or push aside in his mind is much worse than normal now that he is high. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Get your hands off of me.” Laurent spits, he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He’s not used to feeling this way and when he does it’s never around anyone like this before. Damen’s hands fall from Laurent’s sides and land on the bed next to him. 

“What’s wrong?” Damen questions.

“I don’t want you to touch me like that.” Laurent says, finally managing to open his eyes and look back down at Damen who now stares like he’s afraid to move. 

“Did something happen to you?” Damen asks, having no regards as to how to be delicate when asking these kinds of questions. Being blunt and straightforward is how Damen knows to ask questions. “I asked you something a while back that made me wonder.”

“Damen…” Laurent whispers. 

“I want to know. What happened to you?” 

“You don’t get to know that.”

“Did someone hurt you?”

“I told you that I moved in with my uncle for a few years.” Laurent pauses for a second to take a breath. He doesn’t talk about this with anyone and he doesn’t enjoy talking about it.

"Did your uncle hurt you?" Damen asks, finishing the thought. Laurent nods and Damen instantly pulls him down on his chest. He lightly places his hands on Laurent’s back to comfort him and try not to make him uncomfortable. “Tell me what happened.”

“No, you already know more than anyone but Auguste. You don’t get to know anything else.”

"I'll kill him," Damen says under his breath so it’s impossible to tell whether he was saying that to Laurent or just making a note to himself. Damen has spent enough time faking sentiment, but this wasn’t it. He really felt bad for what happened and has no idea how to vent these emotions. It takes him a few minutes to figure out what the emotion he is feeling is, its rage. A white hot rage that makes Damen want to do something very regrettable to a man he has never even met. The thought of someone ever doing such a thing to Laurent makes him angrier than he should feel, at least right now when he has no place to put all of these feelings. After a few minutes of this, he slides Laurent off of himself and moves to sit up next to him. “You should get some sleep, sweetheart.”

“But-” He cuts Laurent off by hushing him and pulling the blankets up around him. 

“You’re tired, go to sleep. We can talk more in the morning if you want.”

*  
Laurent wakes up in the middle of the night shivering. He pulls the blankets up higher but he’s still freezing so, he reaches over to curl up closer to Damen but the bed is cold and empty where he should be. His skin always runs hot, even if Damen got out of bed for a moment the sheets would still hold some of that heat. 

"Damen..?" Laurent opens his eyes and finds Damen sitting at the table under the lighting of a dim lamp with a box opened in his lap. It's only about six inches long and dark brown in color. Laurent remembers seeing it that night he found out Damen sells, hanging out of the bag he found the coke in and where he pulled the shirt Laurent is wearing. When Damen hears Laurent he slams it shut and quickly turns to face him. "What are you doing?"

"What do you need?" Damen snaps.

"I woke up because it’s freezing in here. What's in the box?" Laurent asks, sliding to sit at the end of the bed closer to Damen.

"Nothing." Damen stands up and shoves it in the bag sitting next to him and tosses it on the floor. Laurent stands up to talk to him but Damen walks over and shoves Laurent lightly back in bed like he’s a child. "Go back to sleep."

"What the hell is up with you? Why aren't you sleeping?" Laurent asks. Damen groans and shakes his head in annoyance with Laurent. "Aren't you tired?"

"Yes, I'm exhausted and feel like shit." Damen says. He's never been angry with Laurent before and now he's almost yelling for asking a simple question. Laurent doesn't know why he seems so angry now, Laurent didn't do anything to him.

"Then why don't you go to sleep?" The answer seems simple enough to Laurent, so it seems odd the answer isn’t so obvious to Damen. 

"Because I can't, okay? I can't fucking sleep so I thought it wasn't worth even trying tonight." He spits. Laurent stands back up and drags Damen to the bed. Damen tries to resist but Laurent is persistent until Damen’s too annoyed with him not to listen.

“You need to at least try to fall asleep,” Laurent says, pushing hard on Damen’s chest until he falls back onto the bed. “Even if you don’t sleep, resting is better than nothing.”

“Yeah alright fine, just get back in bed,” Damen settles in under the sheets and even pulls Laurent closer to him so he can stay warm. “I’m sorry I got mad, I just haven’t slept in so long I’m exhausted.”

"It's fine, just go to sleep now."

For a long time, Damen just stares at Laurent, with one arm draped over his side keeping him warm and keeping him from getting out of bed. Damen looks uncomfortable with him laying so close but he doesn't say a word about it. But after a while when Laurent is so close to falling asleep, he notices Damen’s eyes begin to close. They flutter open a few times but after a few minutes, he falls right to sleep. The stress that's usually visible on his face is gone.

Laurent is glad he's asleep, his attitude was so different when he woke up. He was looking in that box when Laurent woke up, and he didn't get angry until he asked him about it. There's something in there he doesn't want to be seen and Laurent doesn't think he wants to.


	5. Chapter 5

The entire time Damen and Laurent have known each other, Damen has felt like he couldn’t think straight. Things seemed like they weren’t going how he had planned, but all he needed was sleep. It was starting to scare Damen, but a few hours of sleep helped him get things back together. Everything that Laurent would do put him on edge and it was starting to seem like things were going wrong. But Laurent is just like the others, he’s not special.

Damen told Laurent yesterday that he could spend the entire day here. It wasn’t until the morning when his head was finally clear again that he realized how bad of an idea that is. Laurent is here overnight and his brother is a cop who was already worried about where he's been spending his time. He's going to find out who Damen is if they keep doing this.

Damen has been awake for an hour now, sitting up at the edge of the bed. But now Laurent starts to wake up so Damen needs to figure out how to calm down and fix the situation.

"Good morning sweetheart," Damen say when Laurent sits up.

"Morning, did you get any sleep?" Laurent rubs his eyes and yawns, looking childlike in this sleepy state.

“Yeah, I got a few hours. Thank you,” Damen says. Laurent crosses over the bed to sit at the edge next to Damen. Neither of them has anything to say to each other so they just sit in silence together. “Come on, let me take you out for breakfast.”

"Okay." Laurent smiles.

“Let’s get you something to wear,” The idea of going out is terrifying to Damen. He tosses Laurent a sweater and a pair of sweatpants. They might be going out for breakfast but that doesn’t mean Damen wants people to know about them. The baggier the clothes on him, the fewer people will notice him. But Laurent just gives Damen a confused look and puts on his own clothes instead. He doesn’t put his tie or jacket back on but buttons his shirt all the way up. His pants are tight on his thighs and Damen struggles not to stare. “I’ll be back in a minute sweetheart, when I come back we can go.”

Damen needs a minute to himself, even if he has to walk a mile down the road to get away then that’s what he’ll do. Damen isn’t used to being around Laurent for this long and it’s messing with this head. Even if he knows there’s nothing special about Laurent, spending this much time with him is strange. He hasn’t spent this much time with a person since _her_. But Laurent isn’t her, they can’t be compared like this. By the time Damen makes his way back, Laurent is sitting on the edge of the bed looking bored waiting for him. His hair is tied up in a bun at the top of his head. Laurent stands up quickly when the door opens and walks straight up to Damen. 

“Not sure why you thought I should wear those but that’s really unnecessary,” Laurent bounces up on his toes a little trying to match Damen’s height, so he can look Damen straight in the eyes. He’s become so comfortable here, Damen almost misses when everything here made Laurent nervous. “I wore my own clothes here, I can wear them again.”

"You're still my little secret. Everyone's going to look at you when you look that hot. I want to be the only one that looks at you." Damen says. Laurent scoffs and smiles softly.

"No one is going to look at me." He says. Laurent doesn’t break eye contact with Damen but he takes a step back. “We’re going for breakfast, not to a club. No one is going to stare at me in the real world.”

“I’d stare.” That’s why they met in the first place. Because Damen saw Laurent’s face and could not help but stare for so long Laurent noticed and stared back. 

“Not my point here.” Laurent smiles a little, abandoning the point, and takes Damen’s hand. Damen leads him out to his car and opens the door for him. Laurent seems nervous about something suddenly, but Damen ignores it because he’s not in the mood for this.

"Just because we're going out doesn't mean I'm ready for you to tell people about me, okay?"

“I realize that.” Laurent slides down in his seat and messes with the top buttons on his shirt. The longer that they drive the more Laurent fidgets in his seat and struggles to find the words to say. Damen doesn’t know why but watching him act like this is entertaining, to say the least. “You know we don’t have to go anywhere if you don’t want to.”

“I’m fine with taking you out sweetheart, I just don’t want this to become a habit.” It’s all a lie though, Damen doesn’t want to take him out. He wants Laurent to go home so he can be alone. Taking Laurent out to one diner isn’t a big deal, but it’s Damen’s emotions that need to be taken care of right now. However, without making Laurent go home Damen won’t have the chance to be alone for a while.

The diner they pull up at is small with very few people at it besides the ones that are working. When they walk inside no one even glances at them. Damen requests a table towards the back and he almost feels comfortable being there. 

Almost. He’s still not comfortable though, there’s nothing that really could make him feel comfortable there. Damen can feel the eyes of the people nearby even when no one even bothers to acknowledge them. He doesn’t like being out around people he doesn’t know. It has always felt, to him, like they can see right through the person he pretends to be. Like they all know the truth and they’re all going to get him caught if he doesn’t leave. Bars are one thing, where everyone is drunk and barely pay attention to each other and he can pretend to be one of them. Places like a restaurant or a store are different though and have always made him uncomfortable. But really the only reason these people would look up at Damen is if he panicked. He needs to stay calm and act normal or they will look at him. Laurent watches Damen settle himself in but doesn’t say anything when he notices him squeeze his fist tight in his lap to stay calm. Every so often Laurent starts to say something but he stops himself before he can.

"I know you want to ask something, sweetheart." Damen eventually say to him. Laurent nods and meets Damen’s gaze when he looks at him.

“How are you feeling? I mean you freaked out on me last night for no reason. You look a little anxious.” Laurent stares down every little movement Damen makes waiting for an answer. Laurent’s entire attitude is too proper for this situation, with his back completely straight and his shirt buttoned all the way again. 

"I'm fine, don't worry about me. I'm sorry about last night, I was just tired. Thank you for making me sleep, I needed that." Laurent stares at Damen for a while, it’s obvious what he’s going to ask about next. 

"What were you doing when I woke up?" Laurent asks. Damen flinches subtly enough that Laurent doesn’t notice. 

"Don't worry about it, I shouldn't have done that when I knew you might wake up." Laurent doesn't need to know what's in the box, he shouldn't even know it exists. They stay silent for the rest of the time they eat. Laurent is confused and nervous but Damen isn’t going to give in and make him feel better.

When they finish eating Damen takes them right back to the motel. Things got very awkward between them after Laurent asked those questions. Damen just ate in silence and focused more on the people around them than he did to Laurent. Laurent has no idea why the questions he asked made him so upset. As soon as they got back to the motel Damen said he needed to make a phone call and left the room. Out of curiosity Laurent peeks out the front window and watches Damen lean back against his car as he talks on the phone. Damen stares down at his feet, up at the sky, at the car next, anything but back at the motel. But when he finally looks up and makes eye contact with Laurent through the window he heads back inside. 

"Yeah, fine I'll be there in a few minutes." He says to the person on the phone. He finally hangs up, stepping back inside and glancing over at Laurent. Damen grabs his keys and the bag he put the box in last night, from under the table. He kisses the top of Laurent’s head and starts to walk out without an explanation.

"Where are you going?" Laurent says trying to step in the way of the door. He's trying to leaving and he didn't even explain why.

"Relax, just stay in here for a few minutes. I need to take care of something I'll be back soon."

*

Damen has been gone for a few hours now and Laurent doesn't want to sit here alone all day. He thought Damen meant he would be back in a few minutes when he left, not a few hours. Laurent wasn't planning on staying here for this long but now his phone is dead and he doesn't have a way home without him. Maybe he could walk home if he leaves now, it's not ideal but he could make it.

"You waiting for Damen?" A man says as soon as Laurent steps outside. He's probably closer in age to Auguste, his jacket is dirty but he doesn't look that bad. It only takes Laurent a minute to remember him from the first time he came here with Damen. Besides his jacket, he looks much cleaner than the last time he saw him. He sits outside a few doors down smoking a cigarette and drinking a beer, even if it’s only the afternoon. Laurent jumps when he hear him talk. In nothing more than surprise, Laurent takes a few steps back and runs into the door. "Relax I'm not going to hurt you, my name is Orlant."

"Do you know where he went?" He doesn't act like he wants to hurt Laurent, he doesn't even get out of his chair. Laurent is not afraid of him anyways but he still needs to be careful.

"No, but he does that a lot. He says he'll be gone for a few minutes and then he'll disappear for hours. Lately, it's whenever he's with you." He stands up but Laurent doesn’t seem to be affected by him at all. If need be, which Laurent highly doubts he will, Laurent could bring this guy to his knees with the self-defense Auguste taught him. "I don't mind though, he's always better after he's been with you."

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing really changes when he fucks a stranger, but he's been more tolerable after he's been around you. He acts completely different when you're around." Orlant says.

"What?" Laurent knows Damen probably slept around a lot before they met but Orlant mentioned it like it's happened recently.

"He seems to like you a lot, you stay longer than the others too." He leans against the wall to talk but his words confuse Laurent.

"Others?" What does he mean by others?

"These walls are thin, I can always tell when he has someone over. None of them stay the night though, they just come for a while and then he kicks them out."

"Has he had people over since I've been coming here?"

"Oh yeah, a few guys and girls. I thought you knew that." He has to be lying, Damen isn't like that.

Laurent hears Damen’s car door slam shut and Orlant quickly stands up straight. Damen jogs up behind Laurent and grabs his arm to spin him around. He looks angry but not at all oblivious to what Orlant just said. 

“Fuck off,” Damen spits at Orlant. Laurent is still shocked about Damen when he grabs him again. It sounds so absurd, Laurent can’t imagine him doing that. “I tried calling you, why didn’t you answer?”

"My phone died." Laurent takes a small step back from him when he tries pulling him back into the motel.

"What's wrong?" He asks. He sounds so annoyed but Laurent wants to know the truth right now.

"You've been with other people since we met."

"Don't listen to him, I shouldn't have left you here alone." Damen grabs at Laurent’s arm but he pulls back again, Damen didn't answer the question.

"Have you been with other people since we met?" He's avoiding answering the question like it's true.

"We never said we were exclusive." He doesn't sound remorseful or upset that Laurent knows like this isn't supposed to bother him. But it does, this isn’t how it was supposed to be between the two of them. 

"Take me back to my car," Laurent says. Damen drops Laurent’s arm and takes a step towards him so Laurent starts to back away again. Orlant has to take a few steps away so Laurent doesn’t run into him. 

"Look, Laurent, it was a while ago. It was before I got to know you. I didn't know if I was ever going to see you again." Laurent tried not to let it happen but his cheeks burn crimson with embarrassment. He turns on his heels and starts walking towards the road. Laurent feels like an idiot finding out Damen hasn’t been exclusive the entire this entire time. He thought their relationship was one thing but Damen thought it was something completely else. 

He drove Laurent to the motel and his car is still parked at his office. Laurent doesn’t care about that right now though, he just doesn’t want to be anywhere near Damen so he started walking. He would call Auguste to come to get him but his phone is dead. It’s almost a fifteen-minute drive to the motel from the office so the walk back won’t be short but Laurent doesn’t care. Damen yells after Laurent for a while but Laurent just ignores him until he hears Damen’s car drive up behind him. 

"Laurent! Get in the car!" Damen yells out the window. Laurent just ignores him and keeps walking, he just wants to be left alone. He tries his best to clear his head but his cheeks still burn bright with embarrassment. Damen swears to himself when Laurent refuses to listen and pulls the car over in front of him. "Where do you think you're going? Do you think you're going to walk all the way home? Your phone is dead you can't call anyone."

“It’s fine, it’s not your problem anymore so just go away.” Laurent tries to keep walking but he’s forced to stop when Damen stands right in front of him. 

"Come on, get in the car." He grabs Laurent’s arm tight and starts to pull him back to his car.

"Let go of me," Laurent snaps. He tries to pull away from Damen’s grip but he just tightens his hold. “Seriously Damen, leave me alone.”

"Just give me a chance to talk to you about this." Damen pleads. He doesn’t normally sound this desperate so Laurent doesn’t know how to react. Laurent tries to fight him but Damen pulls him to his chest and throws Laurent over his shoulder. Laurent slams his fists on Damen’s back in frustration but Damen doesn’t give up. They walk back over to the car and Damen tosses Laurent into the front seat, slamming the door shut behind him. When he walks around to get in Laurent turns towards the door so he doesn’t have to look at him. "Look, I'm sorry okay? It was a while ago, can we talk about it?"

“There’s nothing to talk about, it’s fine Damen. I mistook this to be more than it was, I just want to go home now.”

"Sweetheart-"

"Let me out of the car."

"No." He locks the doors and starts to drive them back to his motel. "It happened that first week after I met you. Yes, I saw other people but it wasn’t anything serious. As soon as I started seeing you more I stopped I promise. We had met once, and you were really formal and uncomfortable I didn't know if you actually want to see me again."

“I definitely wanted to see you again.” Laurent spits back.

"I know. I made a mistake."

“I don’t really care anymore, it’s on me for thinking too highly of a stranger.” Laurent is more angry with himself than with Damen because he trusted someone Auguste would never. Ignoring Damen at the bar that night would have felt better than this does. He’s not even upset with Damen for anything, this is what he has always done so he shouldn’t have expected a change just because of Laurent.

"I like you. A lot, a lot more than I expected to this early on. Please don't be upset with me for a decision I regret." He tries to reach out and touch Laurent but he snatches his hand away before Damen can.

"I’m not upset with you, just let me go home." He’s tired and done fighting about this. Laurent feels like an idiot and he doesn’t need reminding of that. 

"Fine." He drives Laurent back to his car and they don't speak a word the entire time. As soon as he parks down the street from the parking lot Laurent tries to get out but Damen keeps the doors locked.

"Let me out, Damen."

"Will you listen to what I said to you?" Laurent refuses to look at him so after a few minutes of waiting Damen sighs and unlocks the door for him. 

Laurent wants to get away from him. He doesn't trust what Damen says anymore, he just wants to go home. He hurries out to his car before he lets himself feel anything again. A few minutes to calm down and regroup let’s Laurent decide how he feels. Thankfully, Damen doesn't try to come after him anymore, so he just drives away.

It takes a minute for Laurent to focus enough to drive home. He’s scared to see Auguste because of how he’s been acting lately. Auguste is upset with him but Laurent is ready to apologize for how terrible he’s been acting. Auguste is going to be home and who knows who else. There always seems to be someone hanging around with Auguste. When Laurent walks inside he’s hit with the sound of Auguste yelling about him.

"I don't know what to do Jord! He-" as soon as the door closes they go silent. They turn to Laurent when he walks inside but neither of them says anything. Auguste looks upset with him but he doesn't move or say anything. Laurent isn’t sure how to explain what’s wrong with talking about everything so he just stands silently in front of them. 

"Laurent?" Auguste questions. Laurent runs up to Auguste and hugs him. He feels horrible for how he’s acted since he met Damen. But that's over now, he’s not going to see Damen anymore and he can fix things with Auguste. "Hey what's wrong with you?"

"I'm sorry for how I've been acting." Auguste hugs him back but he seems confused. Jord just stands nearby watching, unsure of if he should leave the room. "I'm an idiot, I should have listened to you."

"What happened to you? Where were you last night? I was worried." He runs a hand over Laurent’s back and pulls away so he can look at him.

"I made a mistake, I'm sorry it's not going to happen ever again." Laurent is done seeing Damen, for good. It might not be a big deal but Laurent doesn’t want to be just another person Damen sleeps with.


	6. Chapter 6

Damen can’t figure out why he cares so much about what Laurent thinks. It’s not like they will be together much longer, only another week and a half until it’s time to kill him. He could do it tonight if he really wanted to. But it won’t be as fun if Laurent’s already mad at Damen. Laurent pisses Damen off so much but he hates when Laurent is mad at him.

"Fuck off," Damen spits when Orlant sits down next to him. Orlant doesn’t need to be at this bar too, he’s just here to piss Damen off. He did this, he ruined everything Damen had built with Laurent. There was no reason for him to tell Laurent anything about the other people. He made it seem like Damen has done something wrong but he hasn’t. He wasn’t seeing Laurent yet, he’s allowed to sleep around if that’s what he wanted to do then. 

"Not with your little boyfriend tonight?" Orlant asks. Damen turns away from him and only glances over his shoulder to talk. 

"I said fuck off. I am not in the mood to talk to you, you're the reason he's pissed with me." The girl now sitting in front of Damen jumps when he yells but stays in her place close to him. She reminds Damen of Laurent, with the way she tries to act so confident in front of him. Even her looks are similar to his as her hair is blond and almost the same length as his. Any other night Damen would have been happy to have her attention but now he feels bad just sitting near her.

"That's not my fault it's yours. You shouldn't have cheated on him. I didn't know he didn't know. I just assumed." Orlant sighs and stands up. "What do you want me to do? Buy you a drink or something?"

"I didn't fucking cheat! We weren't together. I want you to mind your own fucking business for once." Damen snaps. Orlant just laughs at Damen and walks closer. Damen squeezes his fist tight and keeps them in his lap trying to control the anger Orlant is bringing out. The girl sitting next to him begins to slide out of her chair to get away from the situation unfolding in front of her.

“So you think that leaving him alone is the best way to fix this? Go talk to him and explain what happened. Or are you done with him? I’d love to get my hands on that boy if he’s available.” Neither of them thought that Damen would do anything but before anyone can stop them Damen is on top of Orlant. He hits him over and over before Orlant even has time to try and defend himself. Damen’s movements are automatic and hard to control with this anger he feels deciding what he does. 

“Don’t you _ever_ go near him again.” Damen grips tight on the front of Orlant’s shirt to hold him against the bar. Blood drips from Orlant’s nose and down the front of his face. He tries to pull away or find a way to distract Damen enough to slip away but Damen is too focused to let that happen. “You don’t get to hang around the motel anymore, get your stuff, and get the hell out of there before I get back or I will fucking kill you. Do you understand me?”

Orlant nods and stares at Damen with wide eyes. Damen’s concentration finally breaks when someone grabs the back of his arms and drags him off of Orlant. Someone else holds Orlant in place to make sure he isn’t hurt too badly. Damen still had things to say, but the person keeps pushing Damen refusing to let him get close to Orlant again. Damen isn’t in the mood for this tonight anyway, all he wanted was some quiet and not to deal with this. It’s Orlant’s fault that Laurent is mad at him. It’s his fault that he couldn’t kill Laurent yesterday. And now, it’s his fault that Damen can’t drink.

All Damen wants is to see Laurent but he knows how bad of an idea that is right now. Maybe if he just gives in and kills someone else he can plan this out better. That girl from the bar walks past Damen with a quick glance, she’s perfect. Damen chases after her to grab her attention. She ran away as soon as he hit Orlant but it won’t be hard to convince her to talk to him.  
*  
Damen wants another drink. Killing that girl felt amazing but now he feels terrible again, maybe even worse than before. It’s like a high, sometimes it feels like the best thing in the world, but the crash from it can be unbearable. He dumped her body in the alley near the bar they met so she will be found within the next few hours and he needs to be nowhere near the area when that happens. None of it felt right, she was a stranger and killing doesn’t feel as good for Damen when it’s a stranger. It’s Laurent he wants, not some girl that reminds him of Laurent. He didn’t know anything about the girl, there’s no way he could really enjoy it how he wants.

The bar that Damen made it to now is only a few minutes from Laurent’s place. He’s so lost at how to fix things but he wanted to drink and be as close to Laurent as he can. He hopes that this will make him feel better, knowing fully that it most likely won’t. He just murdered another girl and they are no closer to knowing that it’s him. However because this girl was just random, he didn’t kill her the same way he plans on killing Laurent so no one will know it’s him. Auguste might assume it was but that’s only because he’s paranoid. He still has no idea who Damen is and has no idea how close he is to finding out. The drinks go down quickly and soon Damen can't keep track of how much he’s had or what he’s been drinking.

"You feeling alright?" The bartender asks. Damen has just spent the past five hours fighting with Orlant, killing a girl, and now drinking. He should feel on top of the world right now, it wasn’t exactly what he wanted to happen but it should be close enough. He couldn’t kill her exactly the same want he killed the others because she isn’t one of them. He didn’t hurt her the same way as them but it was close enough and she died the same way, blood loss. Damen finishes off his drink and fishes his keys out of his pocket.

"I'm just fine, sweetheart." As he stands to leave his body sways, he has to catch himself on the bar so he doesn’t fall over. Alcohol never affects him like this, then again he normally doesn’t drink this much.

"Nope, call a cab or have someone take you home." The bartender hurries over to take the keys from Damen’s hand. He tries to ignore her but he’s so focused on standing up straight she easily takes his keys away without a fight. He could try and call Laurent but there’s no guarantee that he would answer. He pulls out his phone and dials his number but just like he thought, Laurent doesn’t answer. The only other option is to walk to Laurent’s apartment. He chose this bar because it was close to Laurent’s place so he can either walk there or he is stuck. There’s a huge possibility that Laurent won’t let him inside though.  
*

Auguste left the apartment hours ago, leaving Laurent home alone for the night. But Laurent doesn’t even know if what Auguste said was true. Things have been tense between the two of them so he might have gone to stay at Jord’s. Laurent really needed him tonight, it’s only been a day since his fight with Damen and he wanted someone to hang out with. Even now that he isn’t seeing Damen again he doesn’t want to break the promise not to tell anyone, but he misses the days where he was able to tell his brother everything. 

Laurent hears tapping on the window and he knows immediately who it is. He doesn’t want to see him but after a few minutes of ignoring him, Damen decides to open it himself. 

"What do you want Damen?" Laurent asks.

"I miss you, sweetheart." Damen slides through the window and falls in a pile on the floor. His shoe is untied and his jacket is pushed so far down his arms it's barely on. He waves around a knife as he moves to sit back against the wall. The blade is long and thin but he moves around so much and it’s so dark in the room that Laurent can’t see much else about it. "I wanted to see you."

"Are you drunk?" Laurent asks. Damen has never been drunk in front of Laurent before. They have had a few drinks together before but he’s barely ever shown even the smallest signs of being affected by it. 

"Maybe I am, why did you stop talking to me?" He stays in his spot by the window and just stares over at Laurent. But Laurent’s eyes stay fixed on the knife so Damen closes it and shoves it in the pocket of his jacket.

"Because you couldn't keep your dick in your pants and fucked other people when you were seeing me. You need to get out of my room, I'm sure there's someone else you could go fuck right now."

"Look we weren't seeing each other yet. It was that week I didn't see you after the first night. I wasn't sure if you were actually interested in me or not." He kicks his shoes off and pushes his jacket the rest of the way off of his arms.

"I was quite obviously into you." Laurent mumbles. Damen stands up and shuffles over to Laurent’s bed. He throws his body down, sliding close so he's sitting with his hip against Laurent’s.

"Yeah, I know I was an idiot okay? I fucked up and I regret it. I'm trying to apologize here."

"How much did you have to drink you stink." The smell of alcohol radiates off of him. "It's not even midnight, what have you been doing?"

"I've been drinking for a while, now come here." He leans over and tries to kiss Laurent but he’s quickly pushed away. This is not the time for him to try that on Laurent. 

"Stop it, I don't want to kiss you," Laurent says, shoving Damen’s face away once again.

"Fine, can you take me back to the motel? I tried to drive myself but the bartender took my keys."

“You tried to drive drunk?” Laurent asks. Damen nods, not realizing his fault. “You really thought that would be a good idea?”

“What else was I supposed to do?”

“Call someone for a ride maybe?” Damen is past reasoning with at this point. “You could have killed yourself or someone else what the hell is wrong with you?”

“Can you just take me back then? I’m asking for a ride now. Does that make you happy?”

"Just lay down and go to sleep, you're drunk and apparently not thinking straight tonight. I'll take you back in the morning." Laurent makes him lay down and pulls the blankets up around him. Damen slides closer and sleepily smiles up at him. “I’m still mad at you. This doesn’t mean anything, I’m just not going to be responsible for you killing yourself.”

"Whatever you say, sweetheart," Damen says into the pillow. Laurent can't help but smile at him. He's so different when he's drunk, he's giggling and happy. Laurent turns his head so Damen can't see him smile and Damen hides his face in a pillow. Damen sighs and does his best to curl his body up closer to Laurent’s without getting close enough to make Laurent upset.

"Laurent." They hear Auguste yell. Damen looks back up at Laurent and rolls off the side of the bed to hide. Laurent jumps up and opens up his door to run straight into Auguste. If he wouldn't have opened the door Auguste probably would have come straight in.

"What's wrong?" Laurent asks. Auguste leans against the door frame breathing heavy, wiping the sweat from his forehead and trying to catch his breath. His blonde hair clings to his forehead with sweat. 

"I wanted to make sure that you were home. They just found another person dead, that makes two nearby. He has to be in town, I told you he was going to come here." Laurent closes his door slightly so they can walk away from the room. Drunk Damen is unpredictable, but sober Damen would be very upset if Auguste saw him. "I have to go they need us at the station, please be careful okay? I don't want you to get hurt, these people he's killing don't match up with his normal pattern."

"How do you know it's him then?" Laurent is annoyed with all this talk about a killer. He came all the way home to do something he could have done with a phone call. Auguste is just paranoid, there’s no reason for him to lecture like this. “You know, there are plenty of other people that could have done this.”

"The killings fit his style, I don't think this could be anyone else." He gives Laurent a quick, sweaty hug and walks back towards the door. "Please be careful, you've been going out a lot lately and I have no idea where to. I don't want you to get hurt."

Laurent was worried that Auguste was still mad at him but he doesn't think he is anymore. If he knew about Damen being here though Laurent thinks he would be. When Laurent goes back to his room Damen is still on the floor hiding behind the bed.

"He's gone, you didn't have to do that I wouldn’t have let him see you," Laurent says, getting back in bed. Damen peeks up over the side of the bed to look around, making sure it’s clear.

"Why does he want to find that killer so bad?" He asks when he climbs back into bed.

"I don't know, my father was chasing some murderer when he died so I think he's trying to make up for something. Jord told him about it a few months back and he’s been obsessive." Laurent says. Damen nods a little and sits back up. "Come on, just lay down and go to sleep."

"What can I do to make things better? I like you, Laurent, I still want to see you. I know I messed up but I'm not going to do that again." He begs. 

"How am I supposed to trust you?"

"What am I supposed to do to make this better? You want me to call you my boyfriend and take you on dates where everyone is going to know about us?" His tone is mocking but Laurent can't tell if that's how he meant it because he's so drunk everything seems to come out like that.

"I just wanted something more than sex... I just felt like you wanted that too." Laurent feels ignorant for assuming something about Damen so early on. It wasn’t a secret that Damen sleeps around, why would things suddenly be different just because he’s seen Laurent more than once. Damen sighs and forces Laurent into a hug. “I shouldn’t have assumed anything about you, I’m sorry.”

"No, just... fuck why did I drink so much. Don’t apologize." He runs his fingers through his hair again and pulls away from Laurent. "I like you, alright? But I don't want to go out on dates places if you want more than sex then fine so do I. We can be more I just don't want you telling people."

"You don't have to say you want something just because I do. If I'm so shameful you can't be seen in public with me why would you want to be more than sex?" Laurent says. Damen looks back up at Laurent and he looks annoyed. 

"Do I look like the kind of person that would do that? Because I'm not, I’m not going to fake shit to make you happy. Look, you're the only one I saw for more than one night and you stayed over longer. I never let anyone else stay that long and I never drove them home. I don't want to be seen in public because I'm a fucking drug dealer and your brother is a cop, I don't want to get you into any trouble." He says. He raised his voice when he started talking but by the end its soft but still angry. "If that's not what you wanted then it's fine, I just thought... I don't know, I don't ever do this."

"Alright," Laurent says. He looks back up at Laurent, the anger beginning to disappear from his face. "I want that."

"Really?" He asks. Laurent nods and Damen smiles at him. He seems so relieved that he lets his body fall back into Laurent’s lap. Laurent runs his finger through Damen’s hair when his head lays on Laurent’s stomach. Damen sighs softly to himself with relief and happiness. "Oh thank god."

He falls asleep curled up in Laurent’s blankets and his body holding Laurent close. He makes himself look so small when he's asleep even if he's a lot taller than Laurent. In the dark of the bedroom, his skin seems even darker helping hide some of his features Laurent loves to look at in the sunlight. Damen’s fingers curl tight around the blankets like he's stressed even in sleep. Laurent runs his fingers through his hair again and after a while, his grip loosens and he relaxes. He stinks of alcohol and sweat but for some reason, Laurent is just fine being close to him. Laurent trusts him, he seems like he was really telling the truth about wanting more. The only thing that is confusing is the knife Damen had when he had out when he came in the window.


	7. Chapter 7

_Blood. It's always been Damen’s favorite part about murder. The color, texture, everything about it is perfect. The way it runs from this boy’s veins makes Damen wish it never had to end. But it did, and now if he doesn't want to get caught he has to clean it all up._

_The hot water burns his hands when he washes away the blood soaking his arms. He’s always thought about fixing the leak, but he’s never had the time. It would only take a few minutes to fix it but he never has a few minutes. Kill, clean the mess, dump the body, repeat. That's all he ever seems to have time for. He always gets too excited and makes a bigger mess than he needs to, so cleaning takes so much longer than it should._

_His hands turn a light shade of pink as he lets the water rinse away the blood. His skin burns from the temperature of the water, but he doesn't mind, he likes the pain. It gives him something else to focus on for just a minute. So much to do, so much in such little time. Burn the clothes, mop the floors, take down the ropes, remove the evidence. An hour to drive home, finding a place to leave his body, it all needs to be done before it gets too late._

_Count to three, breathe. Focus, don't forget anything._

_Damen has never minded the cleaning, getting rid of all the evidence that he was ever here. Not that it really matters, no one knows about this place. Even if they discover it, they won't know what it’s been used it for. He’s killed more people in this cabin than he has anywhere else in this country and no one has found it yet._

_The first time he killed anyone he didn't know what he was doing. He didn't know what to do with their body, he didn't know what to use to clean, he didn't know anything. He wanted to clean them as little as necessary for him to get away with it, but he couldn't take any risks. He used too much bleach, he got it all over himself, and he didn't burn his clothes after. People could smell it on him when he left and he almost got caught._

_It's always the bleach smell that is the worst. No matter how many times he scrubs his hands he never feels like the smell will go away. One mistake left him dreading the stench of it. But, he won't be back to this place for a few weeks so he needs it to be clean. When he comes back he’s going to want it already perfect. If someone else found this place and it wasn't spotless then he worries they would somehow know what he’s done. It's risky, it always has been, but that's what makes this fun._

_Every time Damen leaves a body somewhere public, where he could easily be caught, it makes this so much fun. He dreads the day someone finds out but he also longs for it. He’s spent so much time doing this it's hard to not want some recognition._

_It takes much longer to clean up than planned for so there's no time for any more delays. Damen lays the tarp down and throw the lifeless body into the trunk of his car. His arms and legs bend in ways that would never be comfortable in life. The tarp's not thick enough, it's going to leave evidence. They're going to find out, they're going to know. Damen has to tell himself to calm down, count to three, focus. Take a deep breath and move on. Damen is strong, he doesn't get scared, he doesn't get caught. The tarp is the same and he's just like the others before him. He will not get caught._

_Count to three, breathe. Focus, don't forget anything._

Damen is woken up by the sound of an alarm going off. His head is pounding at the noise. He feels some shifting underneath of him so slowly he opens his eyes. The sunlight makes his head pound. His arms are wrapped tightly around Laurent’s waist with his face pressed into the side of his chest. Laurent peels himself out of Damen’s grip even when Damen’s fingers scramble to grab tighter on Laurent’s shirt to keep him in bed.

“Laurent.” Damen groans. He rolls over to hide his face in Laurent’s pillow, and after a few minutes, he hears Laurent come back. 

“Drink this,” Laurent says, setting a glass of water down on the bedside table next to Damen. “I have to get ready for work, you can go back to sleep I’ll wake you up when I’m leaving.”

“Whatever you say.” Damen agrees. Right away he closes his eyes and tries to fall back to sleep. His head aches and he feels a little queasy. The bed feels empty where Laurent had just been. Damen pulls the blankets up to cover his face and listens to the quiet sounds of Laurent moving around. The shower turns on and the sound of the water lull Damen back into a light sleep. Unfortunately, the sleep isn’t very peaceful and is filled with horrible nightmares. He’s brought back from his dream when he hears movement nearby. He wakes up suddenly and completely frightened of whatever was in his dream. By the time he starts to think about it he doesn’t even remember what happened. 

"Hey, you're awake." Damen jumps at the sound of Laurent’s voice and turns to look at him but end up groaning at the throbbing pain in his head. Laurent laughs and looks back at him. The sun shines in through the window and directly into his eyes when he starts to look around. He came into Laurent’s room through that window last night. Some drunk, pathetic version of himself begged for forgiveness. "You were really drunk last night."

“Yeah, I remember,” Damen says, laying back and covering his eyes with the back of his arm. All he wants is some peace and quiet in a dark room so he can catch up on some sleep. Mornings in Laurent’s room are so much different than nights. At night its dark, warm and cozy but mornings are bright and harsh with the sunlight shining in. “I hate alcohol.”

“I’m pretty sure you could stock the entire bar with just the smell that came off of you last night. Sit up and drink some water.” Laurent says. Damen gives in and follows directions, drinking the whole glass. “You make bad decisions when you’re drunk.”

"Come here," Damen mutters. Laurent sets his bag down and walks back over to the bed. Damen has to fight the blankets off of himself so he can turn around to see Laurent better.

He's wearing the same outfit he always wears to work but for some reason, it looks very hot on him this morning. The pants he wears are tight enough to see the outline of his thighs and the button up shirt with a tie makes Damen think about ripping it off of him. He knows it's just his work clothes, he looks so nice in it though, all Damen wants to do is get him out of them.

Laurent sits down next to him and Damen pulls him right into a hug. His fingers are soft against Damen’s neck when he curls them through his hair. Damen groans, not really knowing if it's because of the sun or Laurent. After a while Damen lets him pull back so that they can look at each other. Laurent pushes Damen’s hair off of his forehead and he can't help but groan again.

"You look hot as fuck in that outfit." Damen groans. Laurent smiles and just shakes his head.

"It's just my work clothes."

"Doesn't fucking matter I’m still very attracted to you right now. Are you trying to impress someone?" Laurent blushes and Damen pulls him closer. "I hope it's me you're trying to impress looking like that. I don't have anyone to worry about do I?"

"Only you, you're the only one that cares what I wear." Laurent won’t look him in the eyes so Damen holds his chin until he looks up.

"Oh I don't think that's true and you know it, but you know I do love it." Damen runs a hand over his knee when he tries to kiss Laurent. “Stay with me a while, I don’t want to think about someone else looking at you.”

"I can't, I have to go to work in a few minutes." He pulls away so Damen lets him do what he wants when he slides away slightly. 

"Alright."

"I'm sorry," Laurent says quietly. Damen shakes his head and pull Laurent back into his arms.

"Thank you," Damen mumbles. If this isn't the time for that then he feels like he needs to talk to him about last night.

"For what?" It feels wrong to thank him but Laurent accepted Damen’s apology and he didn't think that would happen.

"For last night, for accepting my apology and dealing with me when I was so damn drunk. I don't drink that much normally, you'll probably never see me like that again." Damen pulls Laurent’s face over to kiss him when all Laurent can do it stare back at him. His lips are so soft, softer than Damen remembers them being. Maybe he just didn’t pay attention before. But now it seems that’s all he can think about. When Laurent starts to pull away Damen grabs the back of his waist and holds him there so he won’t leave. “Stay.”

"I only have a few minutes." Laurent pulls away and tries to get up but Damen keeps him sitting right next to him.

"Please just kiss me." Damen sounds desperate and whiny. He hates sounding and feeling like this but all he wants is to feel close to Laurent.

"I can't, I need to leave soon." He pushes Damen off of him but Damen trails along behind Laurent over to the dresser like a lost puppy. "Damen, I really need to go. You're going to make me late."

"So? I'll drive you there later," Laurent smiles but shakes his head. He pushes Damen away so he can go grab his bag. 

"You don't have your keys." He laughs. "Do you want me to take you back to your car?"

"No, I want you to stay with me," He glances over his shoulder at Damen. He looks like he's trying to decide if he should listen or do what he knows he needs to. Being here was nice but it's time that Damen wakes up and go back to who he needs to be. "No, it's fine. It's not that far away I can walk."

"Alright, Auguste's not home if you want to go out the front with me." Damen nods and quickly slips on his shoes and jacket.

"I want to make it up to you, for getting so drunk," Damen says to him as they walk out.

"There's no need for that."

"I'll come to get you tonight and I'll take you out." He smiles but it quickly fades away.

"You said last night you didn't want to do that." Finally, he's starting to understand what Damen wants.

"Just because we can't be seen by a lot of people doesn't mean I can't take you out." Damen can see Laurent trying to hide a smile. "Or are you going to be too busy with Auguste? He did tell you there's a killer around here."

"I don't care what he says about that killer." He says. "He has been saying that for months now, he's just paranoid."

"I'll come by after you get home then, alright?" He nods and they go their separate ways. Laurent to his car and off to work, and Damen to the bar so he can get his keys back. Damen barely remembers anything from the walk to Laurent’s last night. He remembers leaving the bar and falling in through Laurent’s window but everything in between is a blur. The walk between Laurent’s place and the bar is only about five blocks but that’s still a lot of time to lose. Damen hates the idea of missing time.

When Damen walks up to the bar Auguste is the first thing he sees so he ducks into an alleyway to avoid being seen. Orlant stands right in front of the building where Auguste is heading. Damen might have tried to help him out but he almost ruined Damen’s relationship with Laurent so he hopes Auguste arrests him. If Orlant is dumb enough to have something on him right now then he deserves to be arrested anyway. 

"Come on, I don't have anything." Orlant groans when Auguste walks up to him.

"Alright, I'm just here to ask you something." Damen wasn't expecting that from Auguste.

"I don't know anything." Orlant spits back at Auguste. "Why would I want to talk to you?"

"Because I know you have something on you. Even if you don't right now I know you will soon and if you answer some questions then I won't bother you." Orlant stares at him for a minute, he thinks it's a good deal but it's not. Auguste is blackmailing him and he just gave in without a fight.

"What do you want to know?"

"There's someone I need to find. We don't know much about him honestly. I'm not even supposed to be investigating on my own but I have my own theories and I need to know the truth. He would have moved here just a few weeks ago. He's extremely smart, he's killed at least two here and probably dozens before. I think he's in his mid-twenties, he's charming and extremely manipulative. Right now he probably has a person who he sees a lot but he's careful so you may not even know about them if you knew this man." Orlant stares straight at him trying not to show any emotion. "Look, there's no guarantee he sells or anything like that but I want to give it a try."

"N... no, I've never met anyone like that." He knows, he knows it's Damen and he chose to lie about it. In just a few words Damen has gained a small amount of respect for him.

"Are you sure?" He steps closer to Orlant when he starts to back away. "Look, he isn't going to find out you told me if you do know something."

"I don't, okay? Now leave me alone." Auguste sighs and starts to ask more questions when Jord walks up behind them. Jord gives Orlant a quick smile before focusing on what he came here to do. 

"If you find anything please call me," Auguste says just before Jord reaches them. Orlant gives him one last look and turns away from him. He knows, he's smart and he figured it out right away. But Damen needs to be patient, wait until Auguste leaves to make a move. Jord is angry, Auguste won't be here much longer and then Damen can talk to Orlant alone.

"You can't do this. I know you want to know who it is but you can't jeopardize your career for this. It's not your job, you're supposed to arrest people like him not question him. It's not going to help anyone, please I can't watch you do this to yourself anymore." Jord yells. They walk back out to the car and Damen waits until they drive away before he comes out. Orlant walks down the road and Damen steps out of the alley right in front of him. As soon as he sees Damen, Orlant looks terrified. 

"You... it's you isn't it?" He takes a step back but Damen is faster than him. Before he can even think Damen grabs the front of his shirt and drags him into the alley, slamming him into the wall. Without even having to think about it his knife is out and pressed right against Orlant’s neck. It's almost a reflex when it comes to holding a knife to someone.

"One word to anyone about me and I will kill you and anyone you care about." Damen spits. Orlant holds his breath and tries to pull away from Damen. "Do you understand me?"

"Yes." Damen lets the tip of his knife press into his skin hard enough to make a small nick on Orlant’s neck. Blood immediately drips down over the edge of my knife. Damen hold it up for Orlant to see before he wipes it away on the front of Orlant’s shirt.

"I don't think you do. That man just told you about a murderer, who's killed dozens of people and you already know the truth. I knew there was a reason I liked you, you're smart. So now that you've figured out what I've done, you chose to lie to him about me. You made a smart choice this time. But you've seen what I can do when you make me upset, I'd advise you stay away from him and keep your mouth shut." He nods and tries to step further away from Damen but he can't. He's pressed right against the wall and there's no way Damen is letting him go anywhere. "One word. If I see you even go near him again, I will fucking kill you. This could go extremely well for you, or you could fuck it up and get killed."

"How could this go well for me at all? You're in control of everything I do now." He says with shaky words. He's right, Damen is in control but he has to give Orlant something if he wants something in return.

"You know the truth about me. You keep me safe, I help you out." He looks at Damen confused so the knife gets lowered slightly. "You think I've survived this long without a few people helping me out. I need one more thing from you if this is going to work though."

“What do you want?”

“The man that came here after Auguste, his name is Jord, I need you to get some information out of him somehow.” Orlant looks at him like he is crazy but Damen is not joking with him. Auguste trusts Jord and tells him a lot of things that Damen might not know yet. He only needs help for a little while longer but Orlant could be a good distraction. “Try his boyfriend, he’s dumb enough to tell you whatever it is he won’t tell me.”


	8. Chapter 8

A date, that's all it was supposed to be. They didn't have to go out anywhere, all Damen had to do was show up. It seemed fairly reasonable even for a busy man like him. It was even Damen who offered it in the first place so Laurent assumed things would go smoothly. But things never seem to go smoothly when it comes to Damen.

Damen never showed up to get Laurent. It wasn't a big deal, Laurent assumed Damen was busy. He has a life outside of Laurent and Laurent is not trying to interrupt that. But Damen won't answer his calls now and Laurent’s worried he angry about something. Last night when he wouldn't answer Laurent wasn't worried, he was probably just doing something. But all day today too is why he’s worried. Did something happen to him or is he just ignoring Laurent? He's ignored Laurent before but never like this.

Laurent would think about trying to call him again but Auguste got into a fight with Jord and dragged him out to a bar for the night. Laurent doesn't know why his brother cares so much about what his friend thinks but Auguste wanted to get drunk because of it. Anyways, Laurent doesn’t want to seem clingy so not calling him for the night is probably a good thing.

"It's just... I started doing this for him you know? It was Jord who told me about this damn case. I can't just stop looking now I'm so close." Auguste mumbles on. Laurent has already been sitting with him for an hour, Auguste isn’t saying anything new at this point. The other drunk people around them are more entertaining than anything Auguste is saying. Glancing past Auguste’s head, Laurent spots Damen walking in. Damen glances between Auguste and Laurent and instantly looks irritated. Laurent looks right back at Auguste and waits for Damen to leave but instead, he just sits down right behind Laurent so he can talk.

"Sweetheart, we need to talk." He whispers to Laurent. Laurent shakes his head, just enough for Damen to see but Auguste doesn't even notice.

"Let's go find Jord." Laurent starts to stand up but Damen grabs the back of his shirt to hold him there. Auguste is too distracted by sliding his drink across the bar to notice any of this. 

“I’m not fucking joking. Three minutes, meet me in the restrooms.” Damen says just barely loud enough for Laurent to hear.

"Laurent stop, I don't want to talk to him," Auguste says. He takes a drink of his beer and stares over at Jord across the room. He literally picked this bar because he knew Jord would be at tonight. Jord glances over at them but looks back at the boy practically sitting in his lap. The boy’s name is Aimeric, he’s only been hanging around Jord for a short time but the two of them seem to be getting along very well. Aimeric’s arms are draped over Jord’s neck and he stares up at him lovingly. Auguste grumbles to himself and glares at the two of them. "I just want to sit here."

"Two minutes," Damen growls.

"Alright," Laurent says to Auguste. "I don't understand why this is such a big deal. He was right, you know you shouldn't be doing that I don't know why you don't just give it up already. I really don't want you getting in trouble for this."

"I don't need this from you too," Auguste grumbles. Damen stands up and starts heading towards the restrooms, purposely bumping into Laurent’s shoulder on his way by. Auguste glances up at Damen for the first time. “That was rude.”

"I'll be right back, I need to use the restroom," Laurent says. He’s early, but he can't just sit there when he knows Damen is waiting and mad at him for some reason.

Laurent walks up to the restroom door and knocks until he opens it. Damen quickly pulls him in, locking the door behind them. Laurent waits for him to say something but he just paces through the restroom. His movements are strange and he avoids eye contact with Laurent in any way he can. 

"What are you doing here?" Laurent asks. Damen stops pacing and looks back at him. Laurent watches Damen’s chest rise and fall with heavy breathing. 

"I need you, sweetheart." He grabs Laurent’s face and forces him into a kiss. His skin is hot and his touch is rougher than what Laurent is used to. "Let's get out of here."

"No, Damen, stop. What are you doing here? I've been trying to call you but you've been ignoring me." Laurent pushes him away which seems to upset him even more. He takes a deep breath and takes a few steps away from Laurent with his hands above his head. His breathing has calmed down but his attitude hasn’t. Damen's starting to make Laurent nervous with the lack of communication. He won’t just say what’s wrong with him so Laurent is left tiptoeing through talking to him. Laurent can't back down now but he doesn’t know what Damen is planning tonight. "I get that you have other obligations but I don’t deserve you ignoring me for days."

"I'm sorry we didn't get to go out yesterday, okay? I was really busy, but I'm here now so stop talking." He tries to kiss Laurent again so Laurent has to step away. In frustration, Damen closes his eyes and steps away to take a deep breath before he turns back around to face Laurent. His voice is calm and steady but the undertones of anger are not unfamiliar to Laurent. "I am trying my best, okay? I can't always be with you and you know that. But I came to get you today when you're out and surrounded by people that could arrest me, and I didn't even get angry."

"I’m here with my brother and that’s all, your fear of cops is not my problem. I don't care that we didn't go out yesterday I was just worried about you, you could have just told me you were okay." Damen looks confused but he doesn't interrupt. "You just disappeared, I didn't know what happened. That could definitely be a bad sign in your line of work."

"Worried?" He mumbles. He seems so confused by the word because Laurent was worried about him. The confusion morphs into anger for a moment but he quickly tries to hide it. "I can take care of myself."

"That has nothing to do with me worrying about you. I know you can take care of yourself, that doesn’t mean I can’t worry about you." His eyes flicker between the ground and Laurent’s eyes as if he's still confused about the word. Finally, he tries to kiss Laurent again and he lets him do it. His hands hold the back of Laurent’s hair to keep him close. Damen backs the two of them up until he can lift Laurent to sit on the edge of the sink. Laurent lets him kiss him for a while until he realizes how much more from him Damen wants right now. He pulls at the front of Laurent’s shirt when Laurent pulls away. "I need to go, Auguste is going to start wondering where I went."

"Fuck, don't leave me alone." He says, falling forward to give somewhere between a hug and just leaning on Laurent. This isn't his usual behavior and Laurent doesn't know how to react to it. Laurent brings his hands up to wrap them around Damen, only to receive a tighter squeeze from Damen. "Don't go back to your brother, stay with me longer."

"I can't Damen, I’d love it if you would just walk out there with me and meet him." Damen finally lets go of Laurent and snaps back to his usual self.

"I'll come to get you tonight and we can continue this then." He says suddenly trying to get Laurent to leave. Laurent doesn't move to get down from the sink. That's exactly what Damen said to him before he disappeared the last time. "Go on, before Auguste gets worried and comes looking for you."

"Don't lie to me, if you're busy then just say so. I don’t give a shit if you’re busy just tell me the truth."

"You don't believe me? Then go out there and tell him that you're leaving and we will leave now." Now? Laurent can't just leave Auguste here alone, he's drunk and angry with Jord so there won't be anyone to take him back home. "Or, are you too afraid of what he thinks?"

"That's not the problem-" Damen grabs his arm, almost making Laurent fall as he is unexpectedly pulled down from his spot on the sink, and shoves him out of the restroom so harshly Laurent almost falls to the floor. 

"Now or later, it's your choice go figure it out." He says, slamming the door shut before Laurent can say anything else. Laurent wants to go with him but he’s already here with Auguste, he can't just leave him. Laurent walks back out to Auguste but he's no longer where he left him. He looks around the bar but quickly finds him sitting next to Jord as if nothing happened between them. Laurent watches as his brother laughs hard at some joke Jord must have said. Auguste sits on one side of Jord and Aimeric on the other, still lovingly pressed into his side. Jord glances up at Laurent and shakes his head when he sees him walking towards them.

"Please." He mouths to Laurent when Auguste and Aimeric aren't looking at him. Jord and Auguste just made up but if Laurent goes over there and picks a fight for no reason then he might just start the drama over again. If Auguste is with him then there's no reason for Laurent not to go with Damen, Jord will take very good care of him if he leaves. Laurent turns around and sees Damen walking outside. He runs out after him and finds Damen waiting just outside the door.

"You ready now, sweetheart?" He asks with the smallest smirk on his face. Auguste is fine with Jord and Laurent can go with Damen, this is all he wants right now.  
*  
Laurent’s fingers are cold against Damen’s skin as they run softly over the front of his chest. It’s as if his blood runs icy. Were it up to Damen he wouldn’t have any blankets on him but Laurent seemed so cold he let himself be wrapped up in them just to keep Laurent from freezing. Laurent shifts slightly away from Damen and his icy leg brushes against Damen’s and makes him jump. 

"Why are you cold?" Damen mumbles. Laurent frowns and pulls his legs away further. "You're always so cold."

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine, just come closer. Stop moving away." Damen grabs his arm and drag him to his side, he's very hesitant about cuddling so Damen has to put him in the position he wants. Damen pulls him up so his arm is draped over his chest and his head rests on Damen’s shoulder. One of Laurent’s legs lays in between Damen’s cautiously so he doesn’t shock him again. Laurent is quiet for a while, Damen wishes he'd be like this more often. Damen like the quiet, any time Laurent talks he has to be on his toes with his response so he doesn’t say something he doesn’t mean to. He's very formal but good at manipulating a situation if he really wants to. Laurent decides to go back to what he was doing before and runs his fingers down the front of Damen’s chest tracing the outline of muscles he can see.

"What does a drug dealer like you need all this muscle for." He lays his cold palm flat against Damen’s chest directly over his heart. After a moment of watching his hand twitch against Damen’s heartbeat, Laurent looks up to look him in the eyes. He always seems so fascinated by Damen’s body when given the chance to look at it. Damen doesn't believe he's ever had the chance to touch someone as he touches him. Just the innocence of it, his fascination at his Damen’s body is built.

"All the better to carry my beautiful Prince." Laurent rolls his eyes when Damen kiss the back of his hand. "You'd be surprised how often it's been useful."

"Seems like it could be dangerous having a brute like you selling. One mistake and you could kill someone." Damen rests his hand on top of Laurent’s, trying to warm the ice out of his fingertips.

"It definitely could happen, addicts aren't the most reliable people." He can't stop himself from smiling when Laurent twists his arm around so that he can interlace his fingers with Damen’s.

"What?" Laurent asks when he spots him watching.

"Nothing, just listening to you." Damen can't talk about how innocent he sounds talking about his body. He can't talk about how few days he has left before he finally kills him. He can't talk about anything so he keeps his mouth closed.

"Please, don't kill anyone," Laurent jokes. Damen’s heart leaps and he has to hold in his laugh.

"Whatever you say, Your Highness," Laurent shifts his leg as he lets out a soft laugh and Damen jumps hard when it feels like ice on his inner thigh.

"I'm sorry," Laurent says as he pulls his legs away from Damen’s even when Damen scrambles to try holding him there. Laurent, however, isn’t having it and slides away from Damen. Damen can't just lay here with him anymore, he needs to do something. He slides out of bed and slide on a pair of boxers and jeans. He needs air but he can't just leave Laurent in here alone so he needs to calm down in here. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, Yeah I'm fine," Damen says when Laurent walks up next to him. He turns to look at Laurent and see him standing in just his boxers. His eyes instinctively trail over his body. His milky white skin, the faint hint of abs that Damen noticed the first time he let him take that irritating shirt off of him. His hair lay softly at his shoulders and his bright blue eyes stare up at him and wait to see what he does. "What do you want to do, sweetheart?"

"I don't know." Damen turns him to face him and he looks down at Damen’s hands.

"Look at me," Laurent glances up but Damen has to hold his chin to force him to keep his eyes on him. "Is there something you want to do?"

"No." He smiles and shakes his head. The one time Damen actually need him to give his opinion he won't.

"I can't read your mind, you have to tell me when you want something," Damen says. Laurent just smiles and continues to shake his head. "Tell me what it is, Laurent."

"I want to help with your anxiety," Laurent says. Damen is so taken back by Laurent’s words that he pulls his hands back instantly.

“What?” Damen questions. He doesn’t understand what Laurent means by that.

“You get anxious when you’re around a lot of people and when you sit still for too long. I know there’s more but I don’t know what it is.”

“How do you know that?”

“It’s not hard to notice.” Laurent leans against the wall by the window. Damen’s eyes struggle to find a place to focus on. “How can I help?”

"I'm alright, you don't need to do anything."

“Do you need to get high?" he mutters.

“I’m fine, getting high would probably have the opposite effect on me right now. And I won’t get high while you’re here if you’re not comfortable with that, okay?” Laurent nods and smiles again. Thinking about who Laurent is, hurts to watch sometimes. He’s going behind his brother’s back to be with Damen. This is probably the worst thing he has ever done and it is going to get him killed. Damen can’t wait to see the look on Auguste’s face when he finds out that Laurent is dead. It would be easy enough to do tonight, but Damen isn’t ready for that yet.

"Damen!" They suddenly hear someone shout, snapping Damen out of his daydream. Damen freezes for a minute, this was not supposed to happen while Laurent is here. Laurent stares at the door but looks back to Damen for instructions.

“Come here.” Damen grabs Laurent’s hand and pulls him into the bathroom. Laurent doesn’t look scared but he wants an explanation and Damen doesn’t have the time to give him one. He fights back when Damen tries to make him sit down and keeps a hold of Damen’s arm so he can’t leave right away. 

"What's going on?"

"It's alright, it’s nothing. Just sit in here and be quiet, don't come out until I come get you." Damen leaves the door open a crack when he walks out so it doesn’t seem as suspicious having the door shut. He steps away just in time because the front door flies open. 

“Where the fuck is my money?” Adrastus yells in Damen’s face, Aimeric trailing along behind him.

“It’s been two days, I don’t have it yet,” Damen says. Calm, that’s all he has right now. If he overreacts he could figure out Laurent is here. Damen would never let anyone touch Laurent, but he doesn’t even want other men to look at him. Laurent sits almost naked in the bathroom and no one but Damen should have the luxury of seeing that. 

"You were supposed to have it two weeks ago." He walks up closer to Damen making him closer to the door than Damen feels comfortable with. As he talks Damen circles around him so that his own back is to the bathroom door and Adrastus is further away from it. 

"Well, I don't have it yet," Damen answers calmly.

"Then you're going to have to pay in a different way then." Adrastus throws him into the wall next to the bathroom door. But Damen doesn’t fight back, he just lets it happen. "What do you have here that you can pay with huh?"

"I'll get your damn money if you get the hell out of here," Damen says as Adrastus pushes through the stuff on the table. Damen can’t take much more of this. Doesn’t this guy know who he’s talking to? One wrong move and Damen could have his knife deep in his throat. 

"No, I'm done waiting. What do you have here that's actually worth anything." He pushes the rest of Damen’s stuff off of the table and Damen can't take it anymore.

“You’re acting weird,” Aimeric says. 

"Get the hell out of here!" Damen yells when he notices Aimeric staring at Laurent’s clothes on the floor. Aimeric picks up Laurent's shirt and looks at it, sizing it in his hands and realizing it couldn’t be Damen’s. 

“Do you have someone hiding in here?” Aimeric asks. Adrastus looks up at Damen and sees the anger threatening to bubble over, catching on to what is happening.

"Oh? Do you have something to hide?" The bathroom door flies open as Adrastus pushes his way in and Laurent sits waiting on the counter. His legs crossed and back straight, he doesn't even flinch when the door opens. "Well hi sweet pea, come over here."

"No, thanks. I already have one brute, don't care to have another." He says smoothly.

"Get the hell out of here don't you dare touch him," Damen says, having to slip in between the two of them when Adrastus reaches for Laurent who still refuses to even flinch. Damen shoves him backward out of the bathroom and follows him out. When he glances back at Laurent he motions for him to stay where he is. "I'll get you your money but you don't get to fucking touch him."

"Oh come on, I'll let you keep the money if you let me have him." He glances over Damen’s shoulder and smiles, giving Laurent a small wave. "I could use him, he would be useful for both of us."

“Hey, I know you,” Laurent says, hopping down from the counter. Everyone freezes and turns to look at Laurent who now makes his way towards Aimeric. “You’re dating Jord. I thought you were at the bar?”

“What the fuck Damen,” Aimeric says, backing away from Laurent. Aimeric is a young boy around Laurent’s age, probably a little too young for Jord to be talking too. His fine-boned features give him the face of a rich boy, not someone involved in drug dealing.

“Who is he?” Adrastus asks.

“He’s Auguste’s little brother. Damen’s fucking a snitch.” Aimeric spits back. The situation is spiraling in a direction Damen was not prepared to deal with. 

“You’re the one fucking a cop. How is he supposed to know that you’re not a snitch?” Aimeric just smirks and shakes his head, but Adrastus makes his way to grab Laurent. Damen stands in between the two but Adrastus is furious and doesn’t stop.

“No, I’m not letting this snitch get me arrested.” His fingers brush against Laurent’s shoulder but without even thinking, Damen grabs his knife from the table and Adrastus is pressed up against the wall with it held up to his neck. Damen wasn’t even thinking when he did it, he doesn’t know if he really planned on hurting him but he doesn’t care. Adrastus wanted to hurt Laurent, there’s no way Damen is letting him leave here without at least scaring him a little. 

“Don’t you dare lay a finger on him.” Damen spits. Adrastus struggles a little under his grip but Damen doesn’t even flinch. "Laurent is not a snitch, Auguste doesn’t know who I am and he won’t hear about you. Now, I could let you go and you can walk out of here without another word to him or about him and I will get the money to you soon. Or you can open your mouth and I can slit your fucking throat right here.”

“You’re a fucking dick,” Adrastus grumbles. When Adrastus eventually realizes that he’s not going to get his way here he nods. Damen doesn’t pull his knife away but drags him over to the front door.

"If I find out that you are ever within a block of him, I will fucking kill you." Damen spits, shoving him harshly out the front door. He turns around to usher Aimeric out but finds him standing in front of Laurent. 

“You won’t tell him, will you?” Aimeric asks Laurent. “I like him a lot, I don’t want to lose him.”

“Don’t tell anyone you saw me here,” Laurent says. Aimeric nods and follows Adrastus out happily. Damen however, is still pissed and slams the door shut behind them. He wanted so badly for one of them to try something, cutting his throat would have felt so good. But right now isn’t the time or place to be thinking about that, it would have ended very poorly for both of them.

Damen turns to look back at Laurent, who stands leaning against the wall by the bathroom. His feet don’t make a sound as he walks over to touch Damen’s hand with the knife in it. The two stand motionless for a moment as Damen decides what he’s supposed to say in this situation. 

"I enjoy watching you try to protect me, it's very hot. But maybe you should put the knife away." He mumbles. Damen flips the knife shut and sets it on the table. "What did he mean I could be useful for both of you?"

"Just ignore what he said, he's an asshole."

"What did it mean?" Laurent persists.

"You are a young pretty boy, he could easily use you for his drug mules. You’d fit in just fine with the boys he has." Damen eventually gives in. Laurent wanted to hear the truth so Damen is going to give it to him, not sugarcoating anything. He looks shocked for a second as his cheeks turn the faintest shade of pink. 

“Is Aimeric a snitch?” Laurent asks.

“For me yes,” Damen says. “He won’t tell your brother anything.”

“Why was he with that guy?”

“Why do you think? He used to be one of Adrastus’ mules until he decided he was too good to whore himself out to addicts.”

"You were going to kill him? Adrastus?" Laurent questions instead.

"If it came down to that, yeah, but I knew it most likely wouldn't."

“Most likely?” Laurent questions. “I know I was joking but you literally promised me five minutes ago that you wouldn’t kill anyone. Don’t ever do that shit around me again.”

"Fine, your Highness, I'm sorry I promise I won't ever do that again."


	9. Chapter 9

It takes a while to convince Laurent to go to sleep after such an eventful night. He’s angry with Damen and frightened by what just happened even if he doesn’t want to admit it. His muscles tense at every noise he hears for the rest of the night but he doesn’t let himself react. Damen holds his hand and does his best to make sure he feels safe. He didn’t want to be touched but he refused to let go of Damen’s hand even when he falls asleep. Laurent may fall asleep, but Damen stays sitting up next to him. He’s not tired right now so he knew it would be pointless to even try and fall asleep tonight. 

Laurent looks so peaceful sleeping, Damen can’t wait for what’s coming for him. Just one more week before Damen gets to cut open his perfect skin. He wants to hear Laurent scream and beg for mercy, he wants to see the blood run from his veins. But when Laurent’s fingers tighten around Damen’s in his sleep it makes Damen’s heart flutter in a way he’s never experienced before. Laurent shifts around in his sleep with a tight grip on Damen’s hand. Whenever he tries turn over and pull away Damen holds tight on Laurent’s hand so he doesn’t have to lose the physical contact. 

A few hours later Laurent wakes up suddenly and just stares up at Damen. His grip on Damen’s hand tightened right before he woke up but he loosens it when he realizes what he’s doing. Without lifting his head his eyes dart around the room to make sure they are still alone in the room. The blankets are wrapped around his waist and his hair lays messy on his pillow. Damen reaches over to set his hand on Laurent’s hip but he jumps. Damen has to try hard to keep himself from smiling, he likes it when Laurent is afraid but he can’t let him know that. 

"So jumpy, your highness," Damen says, leaving his hand on his Laurent’s hip and sliding him closer. Laurent’s sleepy and nightmare induced instincts tell him to fight to get away from Damen but he only gives himself a small shift. "Are you afraid of me or something?"

He stares at Damen for a minute and then glances over at the table next to him. Everything else goes out of focus for Damen as Laurent reaches over and grabs the knife off of the bedside table. He sits up and flips it open, twirling it around in his hand effortlessly. Instantly Damen’s hands are pulled away from Laurent, who now sits up with his legs tucked underneath of himself. 

"I had a nightmare that Auguste was right about that murderer coming here, but it was you." Damen’s heart stops at his words but Laurent doesn't stop. "It's dumb I know, but you just held this knife to my throat and I can't shake the look on your face when you did it."

"It was just a dream, Laurent." He doesn't need Damen encouraging him right now. He doesn't need to think about how Damen is going to slit his throat soon enough. “Just go back to sleep.”

"Yeah I know I just-" He lets his hand with the knife fall into his lap and Damen jumps. Damen’s heart is racing as he tries to figure out what to do but every movement of the knife terrifies him. Unfortunately, Laurent notices this and takes an interest.

"Laurent..." Damen says when Laurent tilts his head.

"You flinched." He slides closer and swings his leg over to sit in Damen’s lap. It's a small movement but it's something Laurent never does. When Damen just stares up at him in shock, Laurent smiles. Laurent is stunningly beautiful and the knife in his hand somehow makes him more attractive to Damen. But the fear of Laurent actually doing something with the knife clouds over that feeling of attraction. "Are you afraid I'm going to cut you?"

"Put the knife down." Damen tries his best to keep his voice smooth but Laurent can hear the stress in my voice. He lives for making other people struggle. "Laurent, I swear to god."

"Or what? Are you going to hurt me? Tell me what your thinking and maybe I'll follow your instructions."

"Fucking get off of me and put the knife down." Damen wants to push Laurent off but he doesn't want to risk hurting him. He should never be in this situation but now that he is, he’s petrified. Laurent laughs at the sight of him lying beneath him in fear and leans in for a kiss. It's light at first but the deeper the kisses get he twirls the knife in his hand at his side. "Stop it, now."

He flips the knife around and puts it in Damen’s hand, pressing the tip of the blade against his own stomach. He's literally offering himself over to Damen hurting him. Damen’s breathing slows as he tries his hardest to keep calm. Laurent smirks, shifting his weight back slightly.

"You think I'm scared of you? If you're going to do something then do it." Damen grips tight on the knife and takes a deep breath. He could take him away right now and kill him. He offered, he would barely struggle if Damen tried putting him in his car. He keeps his hand on Damen’s and stares at him with no expression on his face. "Too scared to do anything?"

"Laurent, please." Laurent leans forward more so the knife presses harder on his stomach, any small movement it would cut through his skin. "I'm not going to hurt you."

"Then how come you still have the knife on me." He asks. They both stay very still as they wait to see how each other is feeling. Damen finally pulls the knife away and toss it over on the table. Laurent leans back to sit on Damen’s thighs instead of up on his knees. 

"That shit was not okay."

"I wasn't going to hurt you I was just holding it and I knew you wouldn't hurt me."

"No one holds a knife to me." Damen spits. Laurent’s body tightens under Damen’s touch as he tries to change the situation. He leans in close so his lips are right by Laurent’s ear. "Do you understand me? Never touch that knife again."

"You're not the killer, are you?" He whispers. Damen almost feels himself laugh but he keeps it to himself. Laurent holds himself with both of his hands pressed to Damen’s shoulders keeping him at arm's length. He tries to slip out of Damen’s lap but Damen refuses to let him move. 

"Why do you even think you need to ask me that question? Even if I was, do you think the killer would be dumb enough to tell you to your face who he was?" He's not supposed to even think about the murderer when he's around Damen. That question should have never left his mouth if things were going as Damen planed. “I wouldn’t kill anyone, not if I don’t have to.”

"You're not very convincing." Laurent mumbles. Something comes over Damen and he flips them over and pins Laurent to the mattress under him. He grabs lightly at the top of Laurent’s hair to keep his head still and looking up at Damen. He uses his hips to pin Laurent’s lower half to the mattress. Laurent’s hands stay on Damen’s shoulders where he had them before. Damen knows what he’s doing is wrong but he can't stop himself from doing it.

"If I wanted to kill you, Laurent, I already would have." He stares up at Damen with his lower body fighting to get free but Damen use his hips and keep him pinned. Laurent presses hard on Damen’s chest but he doesn’t move. "Do you really think that if I wanted to kill you, you haven't given me plenty of opportunities to do so?"

"I gave you your opportunity tonight." He spits. Laurent’s legs fight hard under him and Damen has to readjust so he can't break free.

"That you did, but like I fucking said, I'm not a murderer."

"Let go of me, now Damen." He spits harshly, so Damen squeezes his fingers a little tighter, not hard enough to hurt but enough to keep Laurent’s hair pulled tautly. In shock Laurent lets out a quiet gasp and squirms even harder in his grip, now fighting to get Damen’s hand off of him before anything else.

"No, I need you to fucking listen to me for once. Don't accuse me of something like that. I would never hurt you." He nods and Damen lets go of him. Laurent shoves his way out from under Damen to get across the room ass far away as he can. It only takes a moment for it to sink in what Damen has done. Laurent is very untrusting of Damen already, that’s what playing with the knife was all about. He wanted to prove to himself that Damen could never do something like that, even though Damen didn’t do a very good job at proving he wouldn’t. But holding Laurent down like that and threatening him is going to terrify him. The small amount of trust h had for Damen has completely disappeared after what he did today. He’s not ready to kill Laurent yet, he needs more time and he needs Laurent trust him. "Hey, Laurent, I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you."

"That's exactly what you were trying to do." He says flatly. He's right, that's exactly what Damen wanted to do but he can't know that. Laurent walks right past him when Damen steps out in front of him and he silently gets dressed. "I want you to take me home now."

"No," Damen says before he can even think about what he’s saying. Laurent’s head whips around to look at Damen. He glares angrily but finishes getting dressed. Auguste might be drunk right now but if he’s home and Laurent comes home angry then he’ll know something is wrong. He’s going to ask questions that Laurent might answer with the mood he’s in now. All Damen intended on doing was making a point to Laurent, but now he’s gone too far. “You just made me uncomfortable with a knife, I didn’t do anything to hurt you. There’s no reason to be upset with me.”

"Damen, now."

"No, you came here to stay the fucking night with me and you are going to stay." Laurent looks afraid for a second but quickly tries to cover it up. "I was just trying to make a point okay? I swear I would never actually hurt you I thought you would be fine with the joke."

"I'll call Auguste if you don't take me home." Damen looks disgusted with him, rage becoming visible in his eyes. But he takes a deep breath and steps back, smiling.

"Your brother is fucking drunk right now, he can’t do anything to help you."

"He'll send one of his friends then," Laurent says persistently. Damen’s smile fades, but it’s hard to tell what he’s feeling.

"Just stay here for a minute, I'll be back." He mutters before stomping outside and slamming the door shut behind him. Damen's temper is what scares Laurent the most, he gets angry very quickly and sometimes he doesn't know how to calm down. It was just joking about him being the murderer but he got so defensive and angry about it. Over better judgement Laurent brushes that out of his mind, not wanting to think about the idea that Damen could possibly be a person like that. Laurent walks outside after him and finds him leaning against his car smoking. He only glances over before bringing all his attention back to the joint between his fingers. He refuses to look at Laurent so he walks right up to him and stare up at him. "Laurent now is not a good time to mess with me."

"I asked you to drive me home and you come outside to get high." He spits. Damen closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, squeezing his hand into a fist.

"You better back off, I'm about done with your bullshit tonight." He turns and blows the smoke directly in Laurent’s face, making him cough and take a step backward. Damen glares at him but he stays exactly where he is. "Fuck off. Go back inside, give me a minute alone."

Not wanting to argue anymore Laurent walks back in the motel and waits for him. Damen stays out there for a few more minutes and when he comes back in he seems a slightly calmer. But, Laurent can see in the way he holds himself as he walks inside how high Damen really is.

"I'm calling Auguste." Laurent pulls out his phone and Damen snatches it away before he can do anything. "What the hell?"

"You're not calling him, I'll fucking drive you home if you want to leave so bad." He yells back.

"You're fucking high. You can't drive now, dumbass." Damen throws the phone down on the bed next to him and his anger comes back.

"I drove you around earlier tonight on much worse sweetheart, and you didn't even fucking notice. So stop complaining and go get in the car." He yells. Laurent is done trying to fight this so he just walks out to the car and gets in. He just wants to go home, he doesn't care if Damen is high or not. The car ride is silent until they get back to the apartment and Laurent is finally ready to talk.

"Damen I can't do this."

"What?" He spits back.

“I’m tired of hiding from my brother and I’m tired of the drugs. I can’t do this anymore.”

"I didn’t mean to upset you tonight." His voice finally softens slightly and he turns to face Laurent. "I promise I won’t joke around like that again."

"That's not the point. I'm tired of hiding." Laurent says back, Damen thinks he can manipulate the situation but Laurent refuses to let him. "I don't want to worry about the drugs or someone coming in and threatening you. I can't deal with that."

“You don’t have to worry about any of that again, I’ll keep it away from you.”

“You can’t promise something like that. You know something will come up again, I don’t want this.”

"I don't want to lose you." He's trying to be nice but everything he says comes out harsh. Damen is getting desperate. If Laurent breaks up with him then how is he going to kill him. 

“I can’t, I’m sorry,” Laurent says. He quickly gets out of the car and hurries inside the building before Damen can say anything else. 

By the time he makes it upstairs a few tears start to well up in his eyes in frustration. He walks inside and tosses himself down on the couch, Damen and him are finally done and it hurts so bad.

"Laurent?" Auguste walks out of his bedroom and Laurent immediately sit up, blinking the tears out of his eyes. He didn't think Auguste was here, he just assumed Jord took him back to his place since they were both drinking. "What's wrong? Are you crying?"

“No, it's nothing, I'm okay." Laurent tries to walk past him to his room but Auguste grabs his arm and drags him to sit back down on the couch. Usually, Auguste doesn’t grab Laurent like this so he must be serious.

"What happened? Did someone hurt you?" He asks.

"It's nothing, I promise." Auguste catches on that Laurent is not in the mood to talk about it so he changes his tone.

"Do I need to beat someone up for you?" He jokes. Laurent nods and Auguste pulls him into a hug. This is not something he’s ever had to deal with before so even Auguste is confused as to how he should approach this situation. Laurent is mad at Damen even though he is the one that broke up with him, he is so angry tears threaten to well up again. He’s still not going to tell Auguste about Damen because he asked him not to and he doesn't want to risk him getting in trouble. But Auguste isn't dumb and he can tell why Laurent is upset, he can always tell when there's something bothering him. "I don't know who hurt you Laurent but it's going to be alright."

"Thanks, Aug," Laurent pulls away to smile up at his brother for being so kind despite not knowing what’s happened. Auguste finally lets him go and he hurries into his room before Auguste can change his mind. Laurent isn’t up for talking anymore, he just wants to go to bed. He’s done seeing Damen for good this time.


	10. Chapter 10

A week after Laurent broke up with Damen, he is still sulking around the house. Auguste has offered to talk to him about it but Laurent isn’t in the mood to talk. Everything seems to irritate him so much more than normal so avoiding yelling at his brother seems to be the better option. He isn’t sad about the break up anymore, he’s just irritated now. Focusing on work during the week is helpful but a Saturday night with nothing to do makes him irritated again. 

That irritation is what lead him to where is now, standing alone in the bathroom with a pair of scissors. For years he’s let his hair stay long, it’s something he’s always done just like his older brother who’s hair is not quite as long. But long hair is irritating and gets in his eyes whenever it’s not put up. It had irritated Laurent for a long time but he’d never had the courage to do anything to change it. After a few minutes of contemplation over whether this is really what he wants, Laurent takes the scissors and takes the first cut. He’s not sure where he planned on going with this from here but it’s too late to go back so he cuts and cuts until it’s short on the back of his neck and still long on top. 

“Laurent? Do you want to come out with us tonight?” Auguste yells through Laurent’s door. When Laurent doesn’t answer right away Auguste lets himself in Laurent’s room only to stop dead in his tracks when he sees the hair on the floor. “What the fuck.”

“It was bothering me,” Laurent says, trying to look at the back of his head on the mirror to see if everything looks okay.

“Are you sure you’re doing okay?” Auguste asks. If Laurent is suddenly changing something about himself that he has kept the same for years it could be cause for concern. 

“This is not about him.” Auguste nods and walks over to help. He takes the scissors from Laurent and fixes the few spots that Laurent couldn’t see well enough. “Thank you.”

“It suits you,” Auguste says, placing his hands on Laurent’s shoulders. “Do you want to come out with us? I’m going over to Jord’s and then we’re all going out for a while. It will give you something else to think about.”

"I'm alright, thank you Aug." He frowns at Laurent and keeps a firm grip on his shoulders when Laurent tries to step away. "Really, there's nothing wrong I promise."

"Laurent please, we haven't done anything together in a while, I miss hanging out with my brother." Laurent eventually gives in and nod, it’s hard to say no to Auguste. He doesn't want to go out but to have a chance to hang out with Auguste sounds nice. It only takes a few minutes for the two of them to get ready and head out to meet up with Auguste’s friends.

The first stop they make is to Jord’s apartment. He answers the door with messy hair and his clothes slightly misaligned. Auguste laughs hard and steps back. 

“Are we interrupting something?” Auguste asks. 

“You’re early.” Jord mumbles. He moves aside and lets both Auguste and Laurent inside. Auguste makes his way in to sit himself down on the old blue fabric couch. Jord lives on his own so his apartment is much smaller than Laurent and Auguste’s. Jord hurries off and disappears into his bedroom without another word. Laurent can make out some talking in Jord’s bedroom as Laurent makes his way to sit on the couch next to his brother. 

“I didn’t think they were fucking.” Auguste says. When Jord comes back out a few minutes later, Aimeric trails along right behind him clinging to Jord’s hand. Aimeric turns to smile at Auguste but as soon as he sees Laurent it falls. “Hi Aimeric, it’s nice to see you.”

“Hi Auguste, you’re here early,” Aimeric says. Auguste smiles and nods, it’s beginning to become obvious to everyone that Auguste has done this on purpose just to mess with Jord. 

“You cut your hair,” Jord says, glancing over at Laurent. “What happened there?”

“I was tired of it.” Laurent says. Hanging out with Auguste sounded fun to Laurent but if he’s going to have to spend it with Aimeric too that’s not what he signed up for. Aimeric, while obviously charming to both Jord and Auguste, makes Laurent beyond irritated. After a lot longer than Laurent wished to tolerate, they eventually make their way out.

They meet up with everyone at the bar a few minutes down the street from Laurent’s apartment. Usually, whenever he goes out Auguste would go off to hang out with everyone but tonight he stays right next to Laurent to talk. Auguste does what he always does and makes Laurent forget about what was bothering him. He’s one of the funniest and sweetest people Laurent knows and he knows exactly how to make a person smile. Laurent started his night with Damen still on his mind but now he’s having a great time without him and not thinking about him at all. He doesn’t need Damen, he’s not worth the fear and hiding. Auguste doesn’t drink but he buys something for Laurent, who only gets himself a soda since he doesn’t want to drink. They aren’t even at the bar long enough for Laurent to finish his drink when suddenly Jord grabs Auguste and pulls him away to talk, leaving Laurent alone next to Aimeric. 

“I heard you broke up with your boyfriend, he’s been horrible this past week I hope you’re happy,” Aimeric says quietly so no one overhears them. Laurent doesn’t even get the chance to reply when Auguste walks back over.

"Hey I have to go to work. Do you want me to take you home first?" Auguste asks. Laurent is devastated that Auguste has to leave but he knows he has to go. He already made Laurent feel a lot better than he felt earlier so he’s okay with him leaving.

"No, it's alright. I'll go home in a while. Go ahead." Auguste looks sad but he nods. Even though Auguste offered, Laurent doesn’t want to bother him by having him drive Laurent home. Laurent glances over and overhears Jord talking to Aimeric.

“I have to go to work I’m sorry, I know I promised to stay with you tonight. I’m sure Laurent would talk to you for a while if you wanted to hang out.” Aimeric glances over at Laurent and smirks. 

“I’d love to talk to Laurent for a while.” Jord gives him a kiss on the top of his head before heading out with Auguste.

“So, what happened?” Aimeric asks as soon as he watches Auguste and Jord walk out the front door. Laurent finishes off his drink and just glares over at Aimeric. “Did you decide you’re too good to fuck a drug dealer?”

“None of your business,” Laurent mumbles. Aimeric orders a drink and places it in front of Laurent. Angrily Laurent pushes it away into Aimeric’s arm. 

“Just drink it, I’m sorry for interrupting you last week. I needed to talk to Damen about something but I didn’t because I didn’t want to bother you. You know, or get stabbed since you decided to provoke Adrastus.”

“If you’re fishing for a thank you for that or an apology for today you’re not getting it. You should have known Auguste was coming over.” Since Laurent is here he might as well have something to drink, so he takes it. He takes a sip and cringes slightly at the taste of alcohol, there goes not drinking tonight. Laurent was in a better mood because of Auguste but a few words from Aimeric makes him pissed off. 

“You want me to tell Damen you miss him? I’m sure he’d take you back, he’s desperate.”

"Fuck off." Laurent spits. Aimeric is lying to Jord and Laurent doesn’t want to get involved in any of this anymore. He trusted Damen and he was an asshole to Laurent so he doesn’t want to talk to anyone involved with Damen anymore. Laurent spends his time trying to listen to Auguste’s friends and ignore Aimeric but he doesn’t really care enough about them. They are boring and obnoxious that he only ever sees because Auguste likes to hang out with them. 

Laurent has only had the one drink but his head suddenly starts spinning and he knows there is something wrong. His arms feel like lead weights and he struggles to move them how he wants to. This feels different than being drunk, he needs help but he doesn’t know why.

"How are you feeling sweetheart?" Aimeric spits. He easily reaches over to touch his arms and Laurent can't shake him off. Laurent stands up to tell Auguste’s friends but they see him stumbling with Aimeric holding him and all start laughing. Aimeric makes a joke about Laurent drinking too much. They don’t realize how serious this is and there’s no way for him to make them understand. They don’t pay much attention to him as Aimeric follows along behind him like he is going to help him home. 

"Someone had too much to drink." Someone says, but Laurent can’t make out where the voice is coming from. They aren’t going to help him so he needs to get out of there. He stumbles outside to call Auguste but his knees start to feel weak and someone kicks his back hard enough to send him into his hands and knees. 

“You should learn to watch your drink better.” Aimeric spits. Laurent manages to flip over on his back and lean against the wall. Aimeric kneels down in front of him and smiles. “This is for breaking up with Damen and making my life hell. If you ever snitch on me to Jord or your brother, I’ll sell you in Akielos as a Veretian whore. Have fun getting home.”

This is it, something is going to happen to him now and he has no way of helping himself. He should have left with Auguste, he should have let him take him home as he wanted. There’s no way to get one of Auguste’s friend’s attention so he just lays at waits for whatever there is coming for him. 

"Laurent, Laurent hey look at me." Someone says. He lifts Laurent’s chin up but everything is blurry. But he knows that voice, it’s Damen. "I’m going to get you out of here, okay?"

He lifts Laurent up and his head flops back on Damen’s shoulder. Laurent doesn't have the energy to hold his own head up or say anything to Damen. He can't even keep his eyes open and soon enough everything goes dark.  
*

Laurent wakes up what he assumes to be quite sometime later, but he’s not in his bed. The sheets are softer than anything he owns. He curls his fingers around the bed sheets next to him and feels the warmth of the bedding where someone was not long ago. He opens his eyes, terrified of who he’s going to see, but then he sees Damen. He’s walking back into the room with a glass of water in his hand. His hair is a mess and he’s only wearing a pair of shorts hanging low on his waist. He looks tired, staring down at the floor as he walks. 

"Where am I?" Laurent says, starting to sit up. Damen jumps at the sound of his voice and looks up at him. He hurries over to the bed to sit down next to Laurent, handing over the glass of water. Laurent is in different clothes now, Damen’s black t-shirt hangs low on Laurent’s neck and his pants are replaced with a pair of shorts.

"My apartment." He says. Laurent tries to sit up more but Damen holds him back down. "Take it easy, you had a pretty rough night last night."

"You have an apartment?" He mumbles. His head is throbbing and the sunlight coming from the window is making it so much worse. He finishes off the glass of water quickly and set the empty glass on the table closest to him.

"Did you assume I lived in the motel?" Damen chuckles.

"Well, yes. It's not like you've ever mentioned it before." Laurent says. Damen smiles and runs his hand over Laurent’s shoulder and down to hold his hand. "I'm in different clothes?"

"Yours were dirty, I wasn't going to let you sleep in my bed like that," Damen says. "Don't worry, I washed them for you, they'll be ready for whenever you leave."

"What happened to me?" He says quietly. He remembers being at the bar and Auguste leaving but now he’s at Damen's apartment and he has no idea why. Something bad must have happened.

“You don’t remember?”

“Not really.”

"I wanted to see you, so I followed you to the bar. I was trying to work up the courage to come inside to talk to you but then I saw Auguste leave so I got nervous and waited. But when I finally came you were laying on the ground outside. I think you were drugged and I,” He takes a deep breath and gives Laurent’s hand a small squeeze. "I didn't know what I was supposed to do to help you."

“I remember,” Laurent mumbles. “I remember a little.”

“Do you know who did this?”

“Aimeric.” Damen looks disgusted at Laurent’s words but he stays delicate when talking to him. 

“I’ll kill that kid.” He mutters.

"Thank you, for bringing me back here," Laurent says just barely loud enough for him to hear. Damen’s story brings the memories of last night flooding back into his mind. He remembers feeling so helpless when Aimeric was standing over him and then when he left him alone for anyone to find. 

"Laurent I'm sorry, I've been an asshole to you. I don't deserve your forgiveness I just," He pauses and shakes his head. "I don't want to lose you. Can we try again?"

"I think we can do that." Damen smiles and pulls Laurent into a hug so he falls onto Damen’s chest and sits up on his lap. Looking down at him, Damen has the biggest smile on his face. 

"You cut your hair." Damen runs his fingers through Laurent’s hair and rests at the base of his neck. It’s almost as short as Damen’s now that his growing out slightly. "It's hot, Laurent. I like it, why did you cut it though?"

“I was irritated and tired of dealing with it.” Damen brushes Laurent’s hair back again and pulls his face down to kiss him, sitting up slightly to meet him halfway. He's very gentle with Laurent and where he places his hands as if he's afraid to break him. "You should have seen the way Auguste looked at me when I cut it. He was so surprised."

"I'm really sorry, about everything." Damen holds Laurent so he can rest his head on Damen’s shoulder while both still sitting upright. "I can't stop seeing you outside that bar, I didn't know what happened and I didn't know how to help. You could have gotten hurt so bad."

"Can we stop talking about what happened?" Damen nods and pulls away from him.

"You should check your phone. It's been ringing nonstop." Laurent lets go of him and Damen hands over the phone from off the bedside table. There are tons of missed calls and texts from Auguste. So Laurent decides to call him back.

"Laurent oh my god, where have you been? You scared the hell out of me." Auguste shouts as soon as he answers. Damen feels uncomfortable listening to Laurent talk to his brother, as if he’s interrupting a conversation he shouldn’t, so he lets his body fall back to lay down beneath Laurent.

"I'm sorry, some stuff happened. I'm okay I'll be back later." Laurent has no idea how to tell him what happened without getting anyone else in trouble. 

"Are you safe?" He sounds so worried about him if only Laurent could explain to him what happened. "If you're not going to tell me what happened, tell me you're safe."

"Yes, I'm safe now don't worry," He say goodbye and hang up before Auguste can continue to ask more questions. Underneath of Laurent, Damen lays looking completely defeated, his hair is a mess and it looks like he's barely slept.

"Do you want to take a shower?" Damen asks. After the events of last night, Laurent feels disgusting so he agrees. Damen slides out from underneath and tells Laurent to wait a minute so he can get things ready since he hasn’t had people over before. So Laurent decides to go off exploring to the rest of the apartment. It’s a lot bigger than he assumed it would be, with an open kitchen, a table, and a full living room but somehow still seems spacious. He has light colored hardwood flooring, large windows that match with the one from his bedroom, and a brick wall straight out from the bedroom. Against the brick wall is a small bookshelf with a large armchair facing the windows nearby. Everything is very clean which is nothing like the mess he makes in the motel. But the one thing that Laurent finds the most interesting is what he discovers sitting on the kitchen table. Back in the bedroom, Laurent finds Damen leaning over the sink. 

"Damianos?" Damen spins around fast and stares at Laurent. "Damianos, that's your full name?"

"What the fuck?" He stares at Laurent in shock and confusion. “How the fuck do you know that?”

"You had mail on your table. Why have you never told me your full name?" He sighs and shakes his head. This is obviously something he didn't want Laurent to know about but he doesn't care. "I like it."

"It's not something you needed to know." He reaches over and turns the water on for Laurent.

"Whatever you say Damianos." He rolls his eyes and points at the shower telling him to get in. Laurent starts to get undressed and Damen walks out. "Wait, Damen."

"Yes?" He turns back around and waits. For a minute they just stand in silence staring at each other because Laurent can’t find the right words to say and he doesn’t want to say anything wrong.

“Thank you.” He manages to mumble eventually. Damen smiles and nods, walking out of the bathroom and leaving Laurent alone to shower. His body aches in places it typically doesn’t and his head is still throbbing so he just enjoys the water and tries taking a moment to calm himself down. Muscles slowly unlock under the hot water but some of them still refuse to calm down. The smell of the soaps Damen owns are intoxicating, Akielon just like him. When he decides he’s probably spent enough time in here he gets out and finds his clothes washed and waiting for him.

"So why have you never told me about this place before?" Laurent asks when he finds Damen sitting on the couch. He wears just a pair of shorts and holds a book in his hand. Damen’s large hands make the book he holds look tiny.

"I use the motel for work and hookups. I don't tell anyone about this place and I haven't had anything turn into more than sex before so I guess I just didn't know how to talk about it." He says. He smiles when Laurent sits down near him but he looks sad and uncomfortable. 

"Do you come here a lot?" On the days that he disappears is this where he goes?

"Not as much as I'd like to. I spent a lot of time here this past week though." Laurent doesn’t know what else to talk about so he just nods and stays silent. Damen tosses the book on the table and moves to sit closer to Laurent. "How are you feeling?"

"My head hurts." Laurent mumbles.

"You can rest if you want." He runs his hand over Laurent’s knee and Laurent’s whole body flinches. Immediately, Damen pulls his hand away and sits back. "Sorry, I didn't mean anything by that I promise."

"I'm sorry, I-" Laurent tries to explain, but Damen nods.

"Laurent, there's no need to apologize to me, okay?" He holds Laurent’s face in his hands so he doesn't look away. "I don't have to touch you, whenever you don't want it."

"I know that," Laurent says. He’s angry that his emotions are running so crazy right now. There’s no reason for this, but he just feels so anxious this morning he can’t seem to control it. "I think I need to be alone for a little while. Will you take me home?"

"Yeah, that's fine." It turns out that Damen’s apartment is almost an hour away from Laurent’s. When he gets home, unfortunately for Laurent, Auguste is home. He hears the front door close and comes walking down the hall to meet him at my door. 

"Laurent?"

"Hi, Auguste." He tries to act as normal as he can but Auguste is already worried so it's pointless.

"What happened last night?"

"It's nothing-"

"No, I'm done with the bullshit. What the fuck happened? Jord told me Aimeric saw you stumble out of the bar drunk, which pisses me off that none of them did anything to help you. But you never made it home, so where did you go?"

"I.. I wasn't drunk, I had one drink." Auguste's face drops.

"What happened?"

“Nothing happened, I made it outside but no one had the chance to do anything to me. I’m okay,” Laurent made the decision not to tell him Aimeric is the one who did this. It would be a bad idea for everyone so he just needs to lie. 

“Where did you go after?”

“He doesn’t want you to know about him.” He doesn’t know what made him talk about Damen, but then again he has no idea why he doesn’t talk about Damen.

“Why not?”

“He doesn’t want to meet you unless things are serious.” He lies. 

“Well, what’s his name?” 

“I can’t tell you that either.”

“Laurent,” Auguste says, starting to really get irritated. “Tell me his name. That’s not normal, you know this is exactly what the murderer does.”

“You don’t need to know his name, you don’t need to know anything about him right now. He’s a good guy, he took me back to his apartment after and he made sure I was okay. I promise if things get serious I’ll tell you more about him but for right now you have to trust me.” Laurent pushes the idea of Damen being a murderer out of his mind, even if the signs should have become obvious by now.


	11. Chapter 11

It has been a few days since the last time Laurent saw Damen and Laurent misses him. Damen called every day to make sure he was doing okay and didn’t need anything. He was very sweet after the incident with Aimeric like he somehow feels responsible for what happened. Every day he called he offered to do whatever Laurent needed of him. So when he called today and Laurent told him he was ready to see him, Damen promised tonight he would come to pick him up and take him out to dinner. The instructions he gave were vague and left Laurent wondering all day what the plan was for tonight. Laurent was supposed to dress nice and meet Damen out front at eight o’clock that night. But the idea of going out to dinner with Damen made him so excited the day seemed to drag on forever.

That night when Damen comes to pick him up, Laurent has to try and sneak out of the apartment. Damen said to wear something nice so getting past Auguste without some questioning was impossible. After the last conversation with Auguste about Damen he has been on edge at any slight mention or thought of the man that Laurent is seeing. 

"Hey, wait wait wait, Laurent come here," Auguste yells when Laurent heads for the door. Laurent sighs and heads back over to face him. "Where are you going all dressed up?"

"Nowhere," Laurent says.

"You’re going out with that guy?" Auguste smiles. 

"Shut up." Auguste laughs and sits up.

"I’m glad to see you so happy with someone. But he better not hurt you.”

"Why would he?" Laurent asks, laughing at his brother.

"I don't know, I just know I don't want to see you upset like that again. And I don’t want to see you hurt by anyone," he says. Seeing his little brother get so upset over a guy was hard for Auguste to watch, and he never wants to do that again. “If he does anything at all you better kick his ass or call me. I don’t trust him.”

“He’s not going to do anything, don’t be over dramatic.”

“What kind of person keeps himself hidden like this? No one normal Laurent.”

“He’s shy, he doesn’t want you to hate him,” Laurent says. Auguste sighs and shakes his head. 

"Fine, go on, go see whoever you're going to see."

Laurent hurries out the door and down to Damen’s car. He's been downstairs waiting for a few minutes now so Laurent doesn't want to make him wait any longer. When Laurent gets in the car he sees Damen dressed up in black dress pants and a white button-up shirt with a black suit jacket over top. His hair is styled nicely unlike his normally messy hairstyle. He doesn’t look like himself so dressed up but it’s definitely a nice change.

"You look very nice tonight," Damen says. He starts the car up and drives off, Laurent still has no idea where they are going.

“So do you, I’m surprised to see you so dressed up.” Laurent catches him smirk and glance over for a second. “Not your normal look.”

“I told you to wear something nice, of course, I’m going to wear something nice too,” Damen says.

“Well, Damianos, I like it. It’s a nice change for once.” 

“Don’t go using that name all the time. People don’t need to know it.” He says sharply. 

“Like who?” It’s just a name, Laurent doesn’t understand why it’s so bad for people to know it.

"Anyone, I didn’t even want you to know it, obviously don’t want anyone else to." The outfit he wears is very well fitted from his shoulders down to his waist, Laurent catches himself almost missing what Damen says as he stares. "But if you want to call me Damianos that’s fine, just do it here. Not around others."

"Fine," Laurent says. Damen glances over and smiles when he realizes he won the argument, but Laurent is too distracted to win this. "Where are we going?"

"Dinner." He says. Laurent waits for him to say where but he just keeps driving. He glances over at Laurent next to him and laughs. "Just wait and see, we'll be there soon."

A few minutes later he pulls up outside of a really fancy restaurant and Laurent doesn't know what to say. This seems like too much, he knew Damen was taking them somewhere nice but he doesn't know about this. Damen would have had to call ahead and make reservations, he has either had this date planned for a few days or he somehow convinced the restaurant to get them in early. Reservations like this are hard to come by. Laurent doesn’t care how he did it, he’s doesn’t like it.

"Damen." Laurent mumbles. 

"You alright sweetheart?" Damen asks. His first priority is making sure Laurent is comfortable, and right now he doesn’t look too happy.

"This place is really expensive isn't it?"

"I wanted to take you somewhere nice." Damen can tell he is still worried about it because he reaches over to hold his hand. "It's alright, I'm paying so you don't need to stress about anything, this is something I want to do for you."

"That doesn't make me feel any better." Laurent frowns. But Damen just smiles and shakes his head, Laurent isn’t too uncomfortable so they are fine to go inside. 

“How did you get a reservation so quickly?”

“A friend of mine helped me out,” Damen says, avoiding giving a real answer. They get out and walk towards the restaurant, Laurent letting Damen hold his hand and pull him along with. Damen can tell Laurent’s still stressed because he stops them right outside the door.

"Laurent look at me. You look fucking stunning right now, and I want to take you out on a nice date as a good boyfriend should for someone as beautiful as you. I'm an asshole to you sometimes I know, but I want to make that up to you. Now we're going to go inside and have a nice date, and you’re not going to worry about anything, alright?" He rests his hands on Laurent’s shoulders and makes him look him in the eyes. Laurent nods and Damen smiles, leading them inside.

The restaurant is just as fancy as Laurent had assumed it was. They have wine and meals fit for royalty. When the bill comes Damen refuses to let him even see it, because it definitely was an expensive dinner. Letting Laurent see how much it cost would only make him feel worse. Laurent doesn't enjoy letting others pay for things for him.

"Thank you, I had a nice time," Laurent says to Damen as they walk out. Damen just smiles and reaches over to hold hands again. Even as they walk past other people Damen confidently holds Laurent’s hand unlike how he normally is. He doesn’t seem to care what other people think today. 

"I told you, it would be nice." Damen helps Laurent in the car before walking around to get in himself. When he does, he tugs on Laurent’s hand to slide him over.

“I don’t know where you want me to go Damianos, this is as close as I can get to you.” Laurent mumbles.

"Come here," Damen says. So, Laurent does his best to slide over as far as he can in his seat but Damen has had enough waiting and grabs him by his waist and lifts him up so Laurent can slide over to sit on his lap. "This outfit, it's been killing me all night you know that?"

"You're the one who told me to dress nice. It’s really not much different from what I normally wear you know?" Laurent’s back is pressed into the steering wheel so the only way he can go is closer to Damen.

"Yeah, I underestimated how hot you look every day," He runs his hands up Laurent’s sides and pulls his jacket off, tossing it into the back seat.

"This suit is expensive." Laurent snaps at how rough Damen is with his clothes.

"I'll buy you a new one then." Damen pulls him in for a kiss, with his hands holding Laurent close. Laurent’s hands stay firmly pressed into Damen’s shoulders, pushing softly so things can’t go too far. When Damen’s hands wander down to unbutton his shirt, Laurent pushes harder and pulls away. 

“We are in a parking lot, we are not doing this here.” 

“Why not? I just spent a lot of money to eat dinner here, we should be able to do what we want.”

"Take me to your motel if you want something." He nods and Laurent slips back out of his lap so he can drive off. It took a few days for Laurent to calm down but now he thinks he’s finally okay enough to be near Damen. They drive back to the motel in silence, holding hands the entire time. 

"May we continue this inside?" Damen asks as they pull up outside of the motel. 

"Whatever you want." They get out of the car and Laurent follows along behind him until they get to the door.

“Thank you for coming out with me tonight.” He pulls Laurent to him, leaning him back against the door. When he kisses Laurent he opens the door and backs him inside. Damen’s jacket is thrown on the floor close by the door. He pulls away so he can pull off Laurent’s tie and unbutton his shirt but Damen jumps and stops. “What the fuck?”

"Sorry, didn't want to interrupt." A voice from behind Laurent says. Laurent jumps and tries to turn around to look but Damen pulls him to his chest so he can’t move. "Thought you looked a little busy."

"What the fuck are you doing here? How did you get in here?" Laurent can hear the bed squeak as the mystery person stand up from the bed and walk towards them. His voice sounds familiar but without looking at him Laurent can't figure out where he knows it from.

"You know why I'm here." He says. Laurent pulls in Damen's arms but he refuses to let go. "It's nice to see you again Laurent."

"Orlant." He just barely breathes out as he realizes who stands behind him. Damen finally grabs Laurent’s face and pulls back to look at him.

"Do you mind going outside to wait for me?" Damen asks.

"Why would I do that? I don't want to sit outside and wait forever." Damen looks down at Laurent, pissed he’s not listening and drops his face. Laurent can finally see Orlant who is laughing quietly to himself.

"You are the one that said you don't want to be around this." He says through clenched teeth.

"I changed my mind." Laurent pulls away and sits down on the bed. Orlant smiles but Damen looks like he’s ready to kill Laurent. For a minute Damen just stares down at him but eventually, he gives up.

"What are you doing here?" Damen eventually asks Orlant.

"Why do you think I'm here?" Orlant spits back. "I've gotten nothing out of your fucking deal, are you going to do something for me? I’ve done everything you asked me to."

"Now is not the time to be talking about this." Damen glances over at Laurent and Orlant’s face goes white. "Talk to me about it next time I see you. I'll help you with whatever it is you need, but I need you to go now."

"I... fuck, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I'm in the way." Orlant hurries towards the door, staring at Laurent panicking the whole time.

"Shut up, just get out." Damen points at the door and Orlant hurries out. Behind him, Damen slams the door shut, turning back around to Laurent with a smile. "Where were we, my prince?"

"You were taking your shirt off." He stays seated on the bed and makes Damen take it off in front of him. Damen goes slow, taking his time with the buttons and making Laurent wait. The shirt slides off his shoulders and lands in a pile on the floor. "What was Orlant talking about?"

"Laurent," he groans. He kneels down in front of Laurent and puts his head in his lap. "This isn't what I want to talk about right now."

"Why did he look so scared when you said now isn't the time?"

"Because I'm a fucking scary person."

"That's not all." He runs his hands up Laurent’s sides, trying to distract him enough to change the subject but he doesn’t. There's something wrong but Damen doesn't want to tell him. He keeps his head in Laurent’s lap so he doesn't have to look at him. The conversation is irritating enough, dragging this on isn’t what Laurent wants to do so he grabs Damen’s hair and forces him to look up. "Damen, what the hell is going on."

"Don't pull my hair like that if you want me to talk." He growls back, groaning softly when Laurent doesn’t let go. "It was nothing, he didn't realize this was serious."

"Serious?" Laurent asks. Damen raises an eyebrow and looks at him confused.

"I took you on a date tonight, you've been to my apartment which no one else knows I have, you know that I sell and you don't work for me. I think I've fucked you long enough to call this serious. This is more serious than anything I've done in a long time." Laurent lets go of his hair and Damen moves to sit next to him.

"When was the last time you were in a serious relationship?" Damen lets his body fall back to lay down on the bed.

"Over a year ago." He's uninterested in this conversation but he's not against talking about it right now so this is the best time to ask. Laurent doesn't know very much about him but he doesn't like to talk very much on most days.

"What happened?" Laurent asks. Damen rolls on his side to drape an arm over Laurent’s lap, glancing up at him through heavy lashes.

"She fucked my brother." he spits back like the words are bitter as they touch his tongue.

"I didn't know you had a brother." He flops back on his back, pulling his arm off of Laurent’s lap but keeping his other hand on Laurent’s thigh.

"Half brother, yeah. I think it's obvious why I don't talk about him. He's dead anyway, no need to talk poorly of the dead."

"What happened to him?"

"He pissed someone off and he got shot." He doesn't look even slightly upset by it. It's probably a bad idea to ask who killed him. "Don't look at me like that, it wasn't me. He was a dick, he pissed off a lot of people."

"I didn't say anything."

"Why did I take my shirt off if we are just going to talk about my brother." He complains. Laurent reaches over and runs his hand over Damen’s chest, tracing his fingers up to right over his heart. He presses the pad of one of his fingers against his chest. 

"I'm enjoying myself," Laurent says, receiving an eye roll from Damen as he rolls back over to push Laurent down with him. His hair falls in his eyes, no longer styled as nicely as it had been. He looks tired and irritated. "Do you normally fuck women then?"

"No, I fuck whoever I'm attracted to." He frowns when he looks at Laurent. He didn’t like the question so it’s time to just change the subject. Tonight, Laurent got a lot more information out of him than normal, no need to push it further than he’s willing to give. Asking Damen about himself is like pulling teeth. When he’s up for sharing take what he gives and move on before he gets annoyed.

"What was tonight about?" Laurent asks. 

"What do you mean?"

"We don't go on dates."

"You've had a rough time these past few days and I feel really bad." He brings his attention to a piece of Laurent’s hair at the base of his neck. He twirls it between his fingers and stares at it to avoid eye contact.

"It wasn't your fault."

"If we wouldn't have got in a fight you might not have been there, or if I hadn't have been such a chicken about coming inside to talk to you maybe I would have stopped Aimeric before he did what he did." He twists a little too hard on the hair and Laurent twitches from the pain. Damen drops it right away and pulls his hands away so he can’t do it again. When Damen gets anxious he does little things that Laurent is starting to pick up on. The main one being squeezing his hands into fists. He does it all the time when he’s around people, talking about something he doesn’t like, or at times that seem completely random to Laurent. So bringing up the events of the past few days made him anxious and he accidentally pulled Laurent’s hair trying to cope with it. 

"It's not your fault, and you don't have to go do expensive shit just because you feel bad." He still avoids eye contact so Laurent has to grab his chin to get him to look up. 

"There are eight kilos of coke in this room right now sweetheart. I think I'm doing alright on money." Damen says. He smirks when Laurent looks at him slightly shocked. “Surprised? It’s really not that much I’ve had more.”

"Let me see."

"You don't need to know where they are." He frowns.

"Show me." Damen sighs and sits up. He walks over to the cabinet in the tiny kitchen near the bathroom. Inside he pulls a wooden board off of the top and pulls out something. It’s a surprise to Laurent when he turns around and tosses it back to him. He just barely reacts in time to catch it and he has no idea what to do with it. Laurent now holds a kilo of coke like it’s nothing. "You sell a lot of these then?"

"Yeah," He says laughing. “I bring coke in from Akielos, so yeah it comes in large quantities.”

“Not helping the stereotypes today, my dear brute.” Bringing this amount of coke into Vere means he’s not just a small drug dealer.

“Sweetheart, I sell more here than I ever did in Akielos. We aren’t the ones with the drug habit.” He walks over and kisses Laurent’s forehead. 

“How long have you sold for?”

“Depends on how specific you’re asking. It’s been a while. I’ve only sold in Vere for like a year.” He sits down next to Laurent, thigh against thigh and just keeps his hands on his knees. The smile on his face won’t leave. 

“What?”

"Just wonder what Auguste would think if he knew what you were doing."

"He'd fucking kill me and then he'd kill you."

“Yeah that sounds about right, I think he would kill me first though. Why don’t you give that back to me so we don’t have to find out.” He takes it back and walks over to put it away where it came from. “So I guess this date ends with me taking you home now doesn’t it?”

“That would be ideal yes.” Damen smiles and nods, putting his shirt back on and extending a hand for Laurent to take. 

“Come on then.” He says. “Let’s get you home before it gets too late.”


	12. Chapter 12

That night Laurent goes home and has a normal night alone. Auguste had thankfully already left for work by the time Laurent made it home. The next day he goes to work as always, nothing out of the ordinary for him. Damen however, made some mistakes. A buyer in town came over that night after Laurent went home and wanted more from Damen than he was willing to give. Choosing to pick a fight instead of following orders from a group of men willing to shoot Damen in the face never works out well for anyone. When Damen refused, this buyer made threats regarding Laurent that actually made Damen nervous. Friday, he spent hiding and hoping they would just leave but these men are furious and aren’t taking any shit from Damen. Damen’s life is one thing but Laurent’s is something completely different. The paranoia of Laurent being so vulnerable to someone hurting him is what made Damen decide he needs to hide Laurent for a while until Damen feels safe. Early Saturday morning Damen spends time driving around town searching for Laurent’s car until he finds it parked outside of his office. Strange to be here on a Saturday. 

To get inside with minimal questions or stares from people, Damen decides he should look the part. He still has his suit at the motel from the date with Laurent the other night so that will have to do. Another twenty minutes added on to this morning before he is back at the office building making his way inside. Someone up front directs him to an office on the side wall on the second floor of the building. There are only a few people at their desks on this floor, considering it’s a Saturday Damen’s surprised to even see this many people. A few people glance up at him as he walks in but he does his best to ignore their stares and do what he came here to do. He takes a deep breath and knocks on Laurent’s office door. 

"Come in," Laurent says. Damen opens the door and sees Laurent’s back facing the door. Laurent shoves a file back into the cabinet and turns around to see who's here. "What can I-"

"Manager? How have I never heard about this before?" Damen says. Laurent stands staring at Damen in shock, one hand still on the file cabinet. Damen closes the door behind him and closes the blinds for the windows next to the door so no one can watch him. "You have your own office and everything. I’m impressed."

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you at work," Laurent’s cheeks flush but he keeps eye contact. "So, what do you do?"

"I'm the regional sales manager."

"Sounds important, and very boring." Damen now stands only a foot away from Laurent, who still stands in the same spot by his file cabinet. "Aren't you a little young to be a manager? Twenty-three seems pretty impressive for this position."

"I'm good at my job."

"I don't doubt it. I bet you’re very scary when someone does something wrong.”

“They don’t typically enjoy my presence even if they haven’t done anything wrong.” He tries to regroup but it still hasn’t registered in his mind that Damen is really there. It hasn’t really registered in Damen’s mind either. 

“That’s because you can be scary, your highness.”

“Really? Do I scare you Damianos? My Akielon drug dealer.” He finally takes his hand off the file cabinet and turns to face Damen, taking a step forward so they are much closer. 

“You don’t scare me, I said you can be scary. There are lots of people that you scare, I am not one of them.” This little game he likes to play to twist people’s words or show off is not something Damen is particularly in the mood for today so it needs to be stopped before he gets started. “However I’d love to see you scare someone here. That's one of the reasons why I came to see you."

"You got dressed up to come in here?" He asks, looking his suit over.

"Of course. Do you like it? It feels wrong, I don't wear this thing for just anyone."

"It's very nice." He takes a half step back to look at Damen and crosses his arms over his chest. "But really, what are you doing here?"

"It's Saturday, why are you here?"

"I'm behind on some work, I thought I could come to get it done now without interruption from people. I see that I was wrong about that though." He steps away from Damen and walks over to his desk. There's a stack of paper in front of his computer. "So my coworkers can know about you but not my brother?"

"Well, there's not many people here besides us. But I could be a client for all anyone else knows, see I'm dressed up for you."

"I do see that." Laurent runs a hand over Damen’s chest when he steps closer again.

"I'd love to take that suit off of you right now." Damen mumbles. “You know this is a fantasy for a lot of people. To fuck the boss over his own desk.”

"That's very inappropriate," Laurent says, showing no reaction to Damen words except for leaning away slightly when Damen takes a step closer.

"Who fucking cares Laurent. I never realized how hot I think it is for you to be in charge of so many people." Damen says. “Can I kiss you?”

“Hurry up,” Laurent mutters. Laurent stands close enough for Damen to lean him against his desk. Laurent’s thighs hit the desk and shift some files out of place as Damen pushes him to sit further on the desk. It’s a small kiss, one Damen wishes was longer but when Laurent pulls away he doesn’t push for anything more. 

“Bet you’ve never done that in here before. You tell me when and I’d give you so much more than just one kiss.”

"I have work to get done Damianos. If you're here for something spit it out." He sits down at his desk so Damen walks around to sit down in the chair across from him.

"How long until you're done with your work," Damen asks. Laurent rolls his eyes and picks up his pen to start working again.

"I don't know, a few hours maybe. Longer if you keep bothering me."

"Can you take it with you?"

"I could if I wanted to, yes." He drops the pen and finally looks up at Damen. "Are you trying to ask me something? If so spit it out already."

"Get your stuff together and come with me."

"Where to?"

"My apartment." He nods and puts all of the papers in a file. He shoves it into a bag along with a laptop and a few other things. Watching him work and do such a normal thing has Damen smiling at him. All of the other people before Laurent were boring enough that Damen never bothered to talk to them about their jobs or anything like that. But for some reason, even the most mundane things seem to interest Damen when Laurent does them. 

“What the fuck are you smiling at?” Laurent spits.

“You, and whatever mood this is today.”

“I’m not in a mood.” He snaps. “I have a normal job, unlike _some_ people and I don’t have time to listen to you tell me about your fantasies all morning.”

“Do you have other plans today then?” Damen asks. Laurent blushes and frowns.

“That’s not the point here.” Damen lets him walk out first and trails along behind him. The people in the office scatter as they see Laurent walking closer but a few people stare at Damen and don’t move away in time. Laurent stops in front of them and their eyes are immediately directed at the floor. “So I assume you both have your work done for today?”

“No, sir.” 

“Then what the hell are you doing staring at this man? He’s here all the way from Akielos, you’re probably making him uncomfortable. Do we need to have a discussion about this?”

“No sir, I’m so sorry if I made you uncomfortable at all.” The man mumbles to Damen.

“It’s not a problem,” Damen says, trying to get Laurent to move along. He said he wanted to see Laurent yell at someone but he meant yell at them about something that actually matters, not about him. This conversation makes Damen feel very uncomfortable. “Laurent, why don’t we let these nice people go do their work. It’s really not a big deal.”

“If you two have time to stand around the office and make eyes at clients all morning then I assume you could get twice the work done?” He waits for a response but when he doesn’t get one he clicks his tongue and glances back at Damen. “My office, Monday morning.” 

“Yes, sir.” They both look confused as to why he decided to pause this interrogation. Laurent turns on his heels and marches out of the office. As soon as they are out of sight of the people in his office Laurent reaches over and grabs Damen’s hand. The nerves get the best of Damen and he had to wait until they get into the car before he can regroup to find the words to say. The only person he’s truly seen Laurent interact with besides himself is his brother and this is nothing like how he talks to either of them.

“I wasn’t expecting that.” Damen mumbles. Laurent smiles and tosses his bag on the floor in front of him. 

“There was no need to stare at you.”

“Jealous?”

“Considering I know who you’re fucking, no.” He glances out the back window and starts laughing. 

“Something funny?”

“They’re _watching_ us.” He giggles. Damen looks back and he’s right, a few of the people that were at the desks upstairs are now standing at the window. Most look shocked while others just look confused. Laurent doesn’t leave here with random men or even show signs of being attracted to anyone. To see Damen not only go into the office for a while and then suddenly leave with Laurent. But also for them to get in the car together holding hands on the way down must be a lot for them to process. “What? Do they think they’re going to get a fucking show out here or something?”

“They’ve never seen you with someone before, Laurent. Their scary boss just walked out of the office holding hands with someone.” Laurent just smirks at Damen and rolls his eyes. “I’ll give them a show if you want me to give them a show.”

“Just take me to your apartment,” He mutters. But Damen decides to just take a chance and leans over to kiss him. Laurent frowns at first but leans in to kiss him anyways. He rests a hand on Damen’s cheek softly and hums happily into the kiss. “Fucker.”

“You think they saw you?” He glances over his shoulder and smiles again.

“They definitely saw,” Laurent says. Glancing back, Damen sees all of them with their mouths hanging open in shock. “Now, as I said before, just take me to your apartment.” 

He pulls away from Damen and leans against the door of the car. The drive is long but it gives Damen a chance to think. He fucked up, and now he doesn’t know if anyone is going to mess with Laurent so he needs to hide him. As soon as they get to the apartment Damen closed all of the curtains so no one outside could see them in here.

"Well, I can't do any work with this light," Laurent sasses. Damen just ignores him and turn on some lamps for him. He makes himself comfortable immediately and sets up his laptop and papers on the table in the living room. Damen however, heads into his bedroom to change out of the suit, Laurent may enjoy being dressed up like this all the time but Damen doesn't.

"Do you want some coffee?" Damen asks when he comes back out.

"Sure," Laurent says, keeping his eyes on his computer. If Damen plans on keeping him here all day he needs to make sure he's happy and comfortable here. He makes some coffee for Laurent and brings it out to him. He's so focused on what he's doing that he doesn't notice Damen hovering with the cup of coffee right away. "Oh, thank you."

"Of course," he takes a sip and looks up at Damen.

"Akielon?"

"Is that bad?" Damen questions. He doesn’t have anything else here, it's the type of coffee he prefers. Spiced Akielon coffee is much different than the stuff found in Vere.

"No," he mumbles. "No, I like it."

Damen sits down next to him but Laurent keeps his focus on the coffee in his hands. The way Laurent seems to be infatuated with the cup of coffee in his hands makes Damen wonder whether he’s ever had Akielon coffee before. 

“Have you ever had Akielon coffee?” Laurent shakes his head and takes another small sip. 

“I’m not usually the type to go for Akielon products when I can get everything I need from Vere. I see I’m missing out though.” He takes long drawn out sips until the cup is half empty even though it’s still boiling hot. Eventually, he decides he needs to keep working and sets the mug down on the table next to his papers.

"You still have a lot to do then?"

"We've been here for ten minutes, yes I still have a lot to do." Damen lays down with his head in Laurent’s lap, making Laurent pause for a second to look down at Damen. This only makes Laurent stop for a second so he can place his hand on Damen’s hair before he continues writing. Damen lays with his head in Laurent’s lap for a couple of hours, watching all that he has to do before Laurent finally closes his computer and sits back on the couch.

"Done?" He nods and runs his hand down over Damen’s jaw.

"So why am I here?"

"Can't I bring you somewhere without you questioning why? That's what boyfriend's do, sweetheart."

"If you brought me to the motel maybe I'd believe that why are we at your apartment?" He's not going to go along with the explanation so Damen might as well tell him what's going on.

"I might have gotten myself into some trouble, it's no big deal. I'm hiding out here for a day and it should be okay. Just thought I'd bring you here with me to keep me company and just in case something happens." Damen says. Laurent stares down at him confused.

"What kind of trouble?"

"Not something I want to talk about with you." The less he knows about the things Damen does, the better. But he always seems so curious about him, it's not good. “I’d rather keep you out of this as much as I can.”

"Tell me, what did you do?”

“Something dumb.”

“Of course, my dumb brute, but what specifically.”

“A buyer asked for more than I had available so he threatened to kill me and anyone he sees me with. Nothing very exciting if that’s what you were hoping for. I’m just trying to avoid getting killed for a little while.” Damen doesn’t care anymore, might as well just tell Laurent at this point. 

“More exciting than what I’ve been doing at work.” Laurent jokes. Damen finally smiles and sits up slightly, hovering almost uncomfortably close to Laurent.

"Take your jacket off, get comfortable." Damen pulls his jacket off for him and toss on the back of the couch. The harsh dark blue of his suit clashes with his skin tone. Damen wants it off of him, he doesn't want to look at it anymore. Along with the jacket, he loosens his tie and slips it off of him tossing it over the back of the couch and on the floor somewhere. "Relax for once, you look so fucking stiff."

"I'm literally just sitting here." He says. He leans back against the armrest of the couch when Damen pushes his body over. All that Damen wants is just to kiss him. He doesn’t even want anything else from him right now. His lips are soft and taste of Damen’s home. Good and bad memories from Akielos are all fuzzy and clouded behind the memories of Laurent. Laurent’s kisses become sloppy as he becomes less interested in just kissing so Damen works his way down to his collarbone. The response he gets makes Damen remember something very important.

"You've never had one of these before have you?" He asks, sucking hard on the skin right under his collarbone. Laurent sucks in a sharp breath and turns his head away from me in shock. Damen lets his eyes glance up and see the pink color Laurent’s cheeks turn whenever he's flustered. This isn’t something Damen has done in a long time. People leave marks on him occasionally when he would sleep around, but he never feels the need to leave marks on anyone else. Laurent wiggle in Damen’s grip until he lets him pull away. Softly, Laurent’s fingers trail over the mark, unsure of what to think. "Leaving my mark on my prince Laurent."

"What's the point?"

"Why does there need to be a reason?" Damen leans down and unbutton his shirt a little more to make another one, and another. Leaving a trail all the way down to waistband on his pants. 

"You really like leaving your mark then?" Laurent says breathlessly. Even the smallest touches can make him react.

"I don't actually. I don't find it necessary most of the time."

"Then what the fuck are you doing?" His voice fails him when he tries to sound unaffected.

"You've never experienced this before. I want you to know what it's like, and I enjoy watching how it makes you react.” Damen moves back up to Laurent’s neck and does something that surprises even himself. On the side of his neck, higher than where his shirt collar will cover, Damen leaves another mark. “Your body reacts to the smallest touches. I barely have to do anything to get a reaction.” 

"Everyone is going to see that." He mumbles.

“I don’t care right now.” 

“You will later.”

“I want to see faces on the people you work with when you walk in. They thought a kiss was surprising, what do you think they’ll say if they saw you now?”

“But you-” Damen pull away and hold Laurent down against the couch.

“Did I do something wrong? If I’m making you uncomfortable you need to let me know.” Laurent shakes his head and pulls Damen’s body back down on his. 

“No, you haven’t done anything wrong.” 

“Then fucking stop getting so scared I’ll be upset about stuff later.” He nods and his hair brushes against Damen’s cheek. 

“How long am I here for?” He mumbles. He wraps his arms around Damen’s back so Damen has to stay laid on his chest. 

“A while, like I said. I pissed some people off and I’m nervous about what’s going to happen.”

“Is that why you closed all the curtains? You seem very paranoid.” He draws small circles over Damen’s back with the tips of his fingers. 

“No one knows about this place but I still need to be careful.” Eventually, Damen sits back up so he can look at him. 

“You took off the fancy suit.” Laurent frowns. 

“It was uncomfortable, I don’t wear suits unless I have to.”

“You just need to find one that fits you nicely and it’s really not that bad.” Damen rolls his eyes and Laurent smiles. “You’re being overdramatic.”

“You prefer I wear more clothes then?”

“That’s not what I meant. You have a habit of not wearing clothes.” Laurent’s cheeks flush but he smiles and pretends not to he flustered. “You also have a habit of trying to take my clothes off.”

“I’m always hot.” 

“I’ve noticed.” He laughs. “But that-“

“Wait, be quiet,” Damen says quietly. There’s someone outside the door, Damen has been listening to the same set of footsteps walk back and forth in front of the door for ten minutes now. Damen stands up and waves to Laurent to stay on the couch as he makes his way towards the door. He grabs a knife from the kitchen and stands by the door so he can listen to them better. Obviously, Laurent doesn’t do as he’s told and follows behind Damen. Laurent stares at him confused but Damen doesn’t have the time to explain. The footsteps get closer and closer until they stop at what sounds like in front of the door. 

“What’s wrong?” Laurent suddenly asks. Damen motions for him to be quiet so Laurent walks right up to stand next to him. “Do you hear something?” 

“Laurent! Shut up.” Damen whispers to him.

“Why?” If Laurent isn’t going to listen then Damen doesn’t care to try asking again. He grabs Laurent’s arm and covers his mouth so he can’t talk. He pulls in Damen’s arms but he doesn’t let go. Eventually, he calms down enough to stop and try to listen to what it is Damen hears. Damen leans back against the wall to keep himself steady if Laurent decides to move again. He keeps the knife down by his side, closer to the door than he holds Laurent. Someone wiggles the door handle and then suddenly the door opens. Damen drops his hand from Laurent’s mouth and moves to open the door, thankfully Laurent stays quiet this time. Before he even sees whos walking inside he grabs them by the front of their shirt and throws them back into the wall. A small boy with light hair and thin features stands terrified as Damen points a knife at the boy. 

“Nicaise?” Damen drops his arm with the knife and reaches back to hand it to Laurent. Laurent, having no idea what he’s supposed to do with a kitchen knife, just holds it behind his back so the boy can’t see it. The boy stands clutching the door frame with wide eyes. “Why the fuck are you trying to break into my apartment?”

“Give me a new book.”

“You could have knocked on the door, I thought you learned your lesson the last time you tried this.” 

“You haven’t been home recently,” Damen walks over to his bookshelf and grabs a random book from the shelf. “I didn’t think you were here.”

“If I’m not home, then you don’t come in my apartment. You try that again, you don’t get to borrow my books anymore. Now go.” Damen tosses the book to him and Nicaise happily hurries out the door.

“What the hell was that?”

“He lives in the apartment below mine. He tried to steal from me a few times but I let him borrow books sometimes now just to keep him out of trouble.”

“That’s very sweet of you.” Laurent hands over the knife when Damen holds out a hand for it. 

“Yeah, well it was either that or deal with him trying to steal from me all the time and I don’t want to threaten a child.”

“What are we doing the rest of the day then Damen?” He asks, walking away from Damen and walking over to his bookshelf. Laurent has always loved reading, especially the classics, but there are definitely some old Akielon books he’s never touched before that he might have to read at some point soon.

“Well, what would you like to do?” Damen walks up behind Laurent and rests his forearm on Laurent’s shoulder. Laurent spends a few minutes quietly looking through all the books that Damen owns. His collection is not nearly as large as what Laurent’s is but it is definitely impressive. “

“Oscar Wilde, I haven’t read this in a long time,” Laurent says, admiring The Picture of Dorian Gray in his hands. 

“Don’t think I’ve ever read that.” Laurent’s head quickly turns to look up at Damen. “I’ve been busy, not much time to read.”

“That’s what you’re doing today. I want to read an Akielon book, you get to read Oscar Wilde,” Laurent picks out an old Akielon book of poetry and they both head to lay down in Damen’s bed together. Damen lays with one arm wrapped around Laurent’s back and Laurent lays with his head resting on the front of Damen’s shoulder and chest. 

“Are you okay like this? Do you need anything?” 

“No, Damen, be quiet and read.” The two spend all afternoon reading, Laurent deciding that he’s not in the mood to talk to Damen anymore. Damen makes Laurent dinner but he barely touches it and still barely talks. 

“I’m really sorry about this Laurent,” Damen says, setting his book down momentarily. “I didn’t mean to keep you trapped here.”

“It’s fine, Damen. Just let me read this.” He smiles and lays his head in Damen’s lap to continue reading. Another few hours pass by with Laurent curled in Damen’s lap to read. At least once every hour he glances up at Damen like he’s waiting for him to say something. They sit in the quiet well into the night before Laurent puts the book down and rolls over in his lap. 

“You look tired sweetheart,” Damen says when he looks up at him through fluttering eyelashes. 

“It’s three in the morning, are you taking me home tonight or can I go to sleep?” Laurent mumbles. “It doesn’t matter to me, I’m just tired I’m going to sleep if I can’t leave.”

“I can take you home now.” He nods and slowly gets up. Damen is not sure if keeping him here today really did anything, but keeping him here longer isn’t going to do anything.


	13. Chapter 13

“Wow, Laurent nice hickey.” Aimeric says loudly. Jord and Auguste both look up at Laurent in shock when they see it. Laurent had spent all of that day and the day before doing a good job at keeping it hidden from Auguste. “Where’d that come from?”

“Why haven’t I seen that before?” Auguste asks. He’s shocked and confused about what he’s seeing. He hadn’t wanted to think about what Laurent does with whoever he’s seeing but this is staring him right in the face. Auguste gets up and grabs Laurent by his shirt sleeve to look at the mark on his neck. “When the hell did you get that?”

“I didn’t want you to see it.”

“You’re seeing someone?” Jord asks. He’s known Laurent for years but the most he really hears about is whatever Auguste tells him. 

“I’ve met him, he’s nice,” Aimeric says with a smile. 

“Wait, you let _Aimeric_ meet him and not me?” Auguste asks. They tell each other everything but this boy knows something before Auguste does is offending. 

“Well, no. I didn’t do it on purpose.” Laurent says. He feels like he’s being backed into a corner he can’t dig himself out of.  
“Come on, invite him over I want to meet him.” 

“You know what, have fun at work I don’t want to talk about this right now.” 

Laurent heads into his room before Aimeric can say anything else to get him in trouble tonight. Jord will have to take Aimeric home soon enough so Auguste and him can go to work but for now he’s trapped in his room with nothing to do for the rest of the night. He decides the best thing to do is to read for a while. Reading that book at Damen’s the other day has put him in a mood to read now. He lays in bed and opens the book he’s been reading. He gets through a few chapters before he hears a noise at his window.

"Laurent," Damen calls out from Laurent’s window. He slips inside and stands, leaning against the wall to catch his breath. Laurent got back home early Sunday morning and now Damen is finally making an appearance Monday night. But now it’s late and he’s just trying to finish reading his book as Damen is randomly climbing in through his window. "Why haven't you answered my calls?"

"You called?" Laurent drops the book slightly so he can look at him. Damen wipes the sweat from his forehead and sighs. Damen was terrified something had happened to him but he was here reading this whole time. "I'm sorry, I haven't looked at my phone in a while."

"You scared me. I was worried something happened or you were mad at me." He kicks his shoes off and walks over to lay down next to Laurent. His head lays next to Laurent’s hip and his feet hang off the end of the bed. "What are you doing?"

"Reading." He chuckles and pushes the book back down when Laurent tries to start reading again.

"Come out with me."

"I'm busy." He looks at Laurent annoyed, sitting up in bed and glancing at the door. He’s too nervous to spend time at Laurent’s place with his brother still here. "Auguste left, he won't be back until morning. You can stay here."

"You're just going to sit here and read?"

"Let me finish this chapter and maybe I'll come out, I'm tired." Damen nods and moves over to lay on Laurent’s legs. He wraps his arms around Laurent’s waist and buries his head in his lap. Laurent shifts his leg under him a little to get more comfortable and Damen groans.

"Careful where you move kid, fuck." He groans again and moves Laurent ’s legs apart so he can lay his chest between his legs instead of on top of them.

"What did I do?" Laurent questions. He barely moved under Damen and he groans like whatever he did hurt him a lot. 

"Nothing, bruised ribs hurt like a bitch don't touch them." He winces slightly as he readjusts in his spot slightly. 

"Bruised ribs?" What did he do now? It’s terrifying to think that something might have happened to Damen. 

"Finish reading and we will talk about it." He lays his head down in Laurent’s lap and closes his eyes so Laurent starts reading again. 

After just a few minutes Damen falls asleep, with is head pressed against Laurent’s stomach and his arms wrapped tight around his waist. Laurent can't move without waking him up so he just stays still and keep reading. As Damen dreams, he tightens his grip on the back of Laurent’s shirt. His forehead scrunching up and his body shifting around in place. To calm him down Laurent runs his fingers through his hair and hush him back into a calm sleep.

After a while, Laurent finishes the rest of his book but Damen's too peaceful to wake up. He sleeps for a few hours but when he starts shifting around again Laurent assumes he's having a nightmare again. It worked last time so he runs his fingers through Damen’s hair and Damen groans, letting him know he isn't asleep anymore.

"Don't move your hands." He mumbles, in Akielon. It doesn’t seem like he realizes that he did it because he doesn’t open his eyes and just curls into Laurent’s stomach more. Laurent stops moving his hands but keeps it tangled in his hair. Sleeping is something that Damen struggles with so if he wants to sleep here for a few hours it didn’t bother Laurent at all. At least here he knows where Damen is and that he’s not getting himself into any trouble. But now his legs are going numb and he’s growing more and more tired the later it gets. 

"You're going to have to wake up sometime my dear brute," Laurent says back slowly in Akielon. Damen’s eyes shoot open and he turns his head to look at Laurent, not lifting it off of his stomach. "You look surprised, didn't know I spoke your language?"

"I just assumed," he says continuing to talk in his language. Laurent doesn't have perfect Akielon like Damen but as long as they don’t go too in depth on any conversations he should be fine. Damen is still in shock at hearing Laurent speak his native language which he hasn’t heard in a long time. He grabs Laurent’s hips and pulls himself to sit up slightly, still laying in front of Laurent. He winces slightly but settles back in place. "You don’t seem to like Akielos, I didn’t think you would know the language."

"You don't seem to know me very well then." Laurent runs his hands down over Damen’s chin and pulls his hand away to try to get up. But Damen has other plans and wraps his arms tight around Laurent’s waist and presses his face into his stomach again. The more Laurent moves the tighter Damen holds him down.

"Mmm fuck." He mumbles to himself.

"You've been asleep for a while," Laurent says. He groans and turns his head to the side to look at Laurent again. "Do you have nightmares a lot?"

"Sometimes, why?" He mumbles again. He finally starts to wake up more and his grip on Laurent’s waist loosens. 

"You looked like you were having one when you were asleep." He nods and moves to sit up next to Laurent. He rubs his eyes and sits glancing around the room sleepily. 

"How long was I asleep?"

"Just a few hours." His eyes open wider and he stares at Laurent confused. Damen doesn’t sleep for a few hours when he’s actually trying to sleep. Falling asleep for a little while as Laurent reads shouldn’t have turned into a few hours.

"Hours?" He questions. His voice is rough from sleep and his Akielon accent is thick when speaking the language. It’s a beautiful language and Laurent really enjoys listening to him speak it. Sleepy Damen is adorable but listening to him speak without hiding his accent is even better. 

"You seem surprised, it really wasn't that long. Not quite four hours."

"I haven't slept that long in a while." He says. "And I haven't spoken my language in a while."

"Are you okay now? I mean after the other day." Laurent lets his voice trail off and waits for him to answer. Damen was paranoid and acting strangely on Saturday but it’s been a day since he’s seen Damen so things might be different now. 

"Yeah, I'm kind of hiding out here right now."

"I'm sorry?" Laurent says irritated. If he’s going to hideout somewhere he shouldn’t be doing it at Laurent’s place.

"If anyone is looking for me they will go to the motel, no one is going to come here don't worry."

"What happened to your ribs?" Laurent asks when he remembers that Damen was in pain from something earlier.

"What do you think happened." Laurent stares at him waiting until he rolls his eyes and lays down on the bed next to Laurent, pulling his shirt up for Laurent to see. Down his chest, there are dark purple marks, even his skin that easily hides bruising isn't dark enough to hide these. His left side seems to have the worst of it with the bruises covering almost his entire side. They go from the edge of his jeans all the way up above where Damen has his shirt pulled to. On his right he has a piece of gauze taped to the side of his chest starting to show blood leaking through. "Same reason I've been hiding out at my apartment and here. I told you I made some people angry."

"What the fuck." Laurent reaches down and lightly trails his fingers over his chest, following the bruising up to the piece of gauze. “What is this?”

"It's fine, I've had much worse. Just be careful." He tried to pull his shirt back down but Laurent holds him there.

“What happened?” He persists. 

“It’s nothing, I got stabbed but it’s no big deal.” Damen tries to say casually. There’s never a good way to casually bring up being stabbed though. 

“I’m sorry, you got stabbed?” Laurent says, almost yelling. Damen tries to sit back up but Laurent needs to understand what happened so he does the only thing he can think to do to keep Damen pinned down and slide over to sit on his lap. 

“Careful, I’m still sore don’t mess with it.” Damen winces. It’s his fault, he tried to keep moving with Laurent sitting in his lap but it hurts for him to use too much upper body strength. He tries again to sit up and Laurent holds him down so he sucks in a sharp breath and rolls his head back. “Laurent please, that hurts.” 

“Stop moving then, you just got stabbed of course that’s going to hurt.” Laurent spits.

“Just barely.” He smirks to try and joke but Laurent is not laughing. This is not funny to him. Maybe this is not a big deal to Damen but why wouldn’t it be to Laurent? His boyfriend just got stabbed for something that he doesn’t really understand, and then he was never told that it happened so he had to find out when he accidentally hurt him. 

“You were stabbed and you didn’t think to tell me that when you got here?” Laurent says. 

“I didn’t want to worry you.” Damen really never wanted to worry Laurent. He was going to try his best to wait as long as possible to talk about it and then when he did he was going to make it seem like not a big deal. 

“Yeah well too fucking late.” He sighs and tries to push Laurent off of him. “Don’t try and sit up you asshole, what the fuck happened?”

“Sweetheart please, like I told you, I made some people angry and this is what they did when they found me. It’s really not as bad as I made it sound, just like a cut. Honestly it doesn’t really hurt much.” He grabs Laurent’s waist to try and push him off again so Laurent grabs both of his wrists and pries them off of himself so he can hold Damen still. “This is why I brought you to my apartment, I didn’t want you to get hurt.” 

"How many guys did this to you?" Laurent asks. “And when did this happen?”

"More than one, first few went down quickly it was when more came in I had a hard time defending myself. And it happened early this morning.” 

"Those muscles finally put to good use." He smirks and stops trying to fight to get Laurent off of him. Laurent looks at the bandage again and the blood leaking through, realizing how fresh it is. “This needs to be cleaned.”

“I’ll do it later. Don’t move now.” Laurent slides off of his lap and drags Damen to his bathroom with him. He knows Laurent won’t let him walk away without cleaning this so he just leans back against the bathroom counter and pulls his shirt up to make things easier. When Laurent pulls off the bandage he just sits patiently and watches. The cut is smooth like it would be expected to be with seven sloppy stitches holding it closed. 

“Did you suture this yourself or something?” Laurent jokes.

“I did.” He says nodding. Laurent didn’t think Damen would be this dumb but apparently, he is. With the way he keeps the motel room there’s no way this was clean enough to be safe when he stitched it. “It’s not deep don’t worry.”

“You didn’t think to go to a doctor? This isn’t just a fucking graze.” The stitches barely hold the wound closed, but it’s not bad work for not seeing a doctor. However, it looks like he just wiped away some of the blood when it happened but he didn’t actually clean the area as well as he should have. 

“It didn’t hit anything important, so it wasn’t a big deal. They would have done the same thing I did on my own.” Damen winces when Laurent dabs the area with hydrogen peroxide. “You don’t need to be so upset with me, I’m going to be fine don’t be so rough.”

“How would you know if it didn’t hit anything important? You didn’t see a fucking doctor.” Laurent spits back. He should have seen a doctor but what’s the point of arguing that with him now? He doesn’t flinch anymore when Laurent cleans the rest of the dried blood off of the area. “I swear if you get fucking stabbed again I’m going to be pissed.”

“But if I get stabbed again I get to see you fuss over me again. It’s cute,” He smirks. Instead of responding Laurent takes his other hand which rests on the side of Damen’s chest to brace himself and digs his thumb into one of the bruises until he flinches. “You can’t clean out my wounds like a concerned boyfriend and then stab me again.”

“Watch me.” Laurent places the bandage on his chest and Damen immediately drops his shirt so he stops messing with it. “Don’t you dare do this shit again or I’ll be the next one to stab you.”

“You give me so many mixed signals.” He says with a small smile. 

“What do you mean by that?” They walk back out to Laurent’s room and Damen lets himself fall back into the blankets. Even if he slept for a few hours he’s still exhausted and could probably sleep for a few more if given the chance. 

“You’ll be so sweet and loving to me and then you’ll yell at me like you’re my mother or something.” He says.

“That’s just my attitude.” Damen laughs and reaches out to pull him down on the bed next to him. “If you haven’t figured out my attitude by now Damianos I think there’s something wrong.”

“You’re right, I know better than to ask that question.”

“Auguste saw the mark you left on my neck.” He blurts out.

“And what did he have to say?” Damen asks. 

“He was very surprised.” Laurent mumbles. 

“I bet he was.”

“Are you upset he saw?” Damen has never been okay with Auguste seeing anything that could tell Auguste who he is but suddenly he’s leaving marks all over Laurent like he wants to be seen. Damen is falling apart because of Laurent, and he has no idea. Laurent should be dead right now, it’s been over a month since they met but Damen can’t bring himself to do it yet.

“I thought we went over this, I did it because I don’t care that he saw.” He pulls Laurent’s face down to kiss him. Soft and slow only for a second before he pulls away. He suddenly sits up and pulls away from Laurent. "It's getting late, I'm keeping you up." 

"You're not keeping me up Damianos. You don't have to leave." Laurent wants to be able to check on his wound if it starts bleeding again. He doesn’t trust Damen enough to keep it as clean as he thinks it should be. 

"You have to work tomorrow." He persists. 

"You probably do too." Unless he’s still on this strange hideout. “And it’s really not that late.”

"I work when I want to, you, on the other hand, do not."

"I'm enjoying your company." Laurent really doesn’t want him to go tonight, at least not yet. 

"Even though I spent most of the time sleeping?" 

"Especially since you spent most of the time sleeping." He laughs and rolls his eyes at Laurent. "Stay with me?"

“I can’t, I really should go. I need to get some shit done tonight. Is your brother home tonight?” He sits at the edge of the bed and slips on his shoes. Going back to the motel means going back out where he was stabbed.

“No, he’s out.”

“Out at work or out fucking some girl?” He jokes.

“Working, but my brother is gay,” Laurent says. He surprises even himself by saying it. 

“He is?” Damen stops what he’s doing to look back at Laurent. He knows a lot about the two of them, but Auguste keeps his sexuality a well-hidden secret. 

“Well, he’s not out or anything but yeah. He very obviously doesn’t like women.” Laurent’s cheeks flush. He feels strange talking about this. 

“And how do you know this?”

“I’ve lived with my brother for most of my life, and he took care of me for the better part of it. It's not that hard to pick up on a few things about a person.” He says. Damen takes a second to nod to him and process what he was just told. This is Auguste’s secret, Auguste doesn’t know that Laurent knows and Laurent has never told another person before. It’s not a secret that Laurent has the right to talk about but it just slipped out. There was no reason to bring it up but he did anyways. But the second doesn’t last very long before Damen’s on his feet making his way towards the window. 

“I have to go, sweetheart, I’ll see you later.”

"Damen wait." He stops and sits back down on the bed next to Laurent. "Are you safe? Do you think.."

"I'm safe, don't worry." He smiles and wraps an arm around Laurent’s side. 

"But your ribs." He’s so afraid of what is going to happen to Damen next. 

"They fucked up my ribs, but I think they're done. Things are good now, they are going to be better than they ever have been, don't worry."


	14. Chapter 14

For a few days after the night Damen showed up in Laurent’s room, Damen disappears. He stops answering calls and his car isn’t parked outside his motel. Damen was still paranoid about someone showing up at the motel so he stayed at his apartment for a few days without his phone. He didn’t tell Laurent what he was doing or where he was going so of course Laurent is confused where he disappeared to. 

But Thursday night Laurent drives past the motel to check and see if he’s come back yet. To his surprise, Damen’s car is parked in his usual spot right outside. Damen doesn’t like phone calls or surprise visits but Laurent is so worried that he decides to just go and check on him. 

"Damen?" Laurent slowly opens the door and walk inside the motel room. At the back of the room Damen sits sprawled out in a chair with a man sitting in front of him. It’s been a few days since the last time he saw Damen and he was starting to get really worried. By the looks of Damen now, Laurent was right to be nervous. Damen’s skin looks pale and he looks barely coherent. 

"What the hell are you doing here?" Damen yells in Akielon. Laurent starts backing up out the door but the guy gets up. "Nik, stop. Leave him alone."

"No, get back in here." Nik yells. Laurent turns to run out but Nik grabs his wrist and slams the door shut behind them when he pulls Laurent back in. "Sit down and wait until I'm done."

"Leave him alone, he's not going to say anything." Damen says. In shock Laurent just stands by the door but Nik shoves him down on the bed. "Hey, sweetheart, it's alright Nik won't hurt you."

"I'm sorry for coming. I was worried about you," If Laurent is interrupting something that could be bad for Damen. But there’s something wrong here, Damen looks really sick. His skin is pale and his body looks weak. “If I’m interrupting I can come back.” 

"It's alright, just calm down." Nik looks back and forth between the two of them and bursts into laughter. “What the hell are you laughing at?”

"What happened to you?" He says to Damen.

"I don't know what the you're talking about." Damen’s voice falters. He glances between Laurent and Nik nervously. He squeezes the bottom of his shirt tightly and leans forward in his chair. 

"You're being nice to him. I've never seen you talk to someone like this before. You wouldn't have cared that I scared him." Nik laughs. 

"Shut up, my personal life is none of your business."

"Oh, so he's your personal life?" He questions. “This turned into more than just a hookup then?”

"Nik, shut up and leave," Damen says, glancing over at Laurent. 

"No, we aren't playing this game again. Where is it?" He stares down at Damen until he points at the bag on the floor. Nik grabs it and digs through it until he finds whatever he's looking for. He takes whatever he grabbed and puts it in his own bag laying on the floor by his chair. 

"So I'll send all my buyers to you now, boss?" Damen mutters.

"Look asshat, I fucking get that you sell but I'm not working with a junkie. If you’re going to use again then I’m out." Nik yells directly in Damen’s face. Damen runs his fingers through his hair and stares down at the floor.

"I'm not a junkie." He spits. Junkie, it takes Laurent a while to figure out what the word is, Laurent is starting to learn a few more Akielon words for Damen but today is the first time he’s heard that word. "I've got a buyer coming in a few days, am I supposed to send them to you?"

"Are you going to fucking use it all before they get here?" Nik asks. Damen quickly looks back up and shoots Nik a look. 

"This was a one-time thing, stop bringing it back up." Damen glances over at Laurent and Nik stops and stares right at Laurent.

"He doesn't know?" He asks. Damen just glared at him and a smile threatens to cross Nik's face. He knows something Laurent doesn’t and he’s going to tell him no matter what Damen wants. "Kid, your boyfriend is an addict."

"I'm not an addict. I haven't fucking used in years and you know that. Stop telling him lies." Damen sits up and Laurent can see on his face, he was high very recently. He’s seen him high a few times and this is the same look in his eyes. There’s something different about this though, this is a different high than he’s seen before. 

"What did you take?" Laurent asks. 

"Heroine." Nik spits at me. Heroine? Laurent realizes now after he’s asked, these aren’t words that he’s learned yet. They aren’t words he thought he would ever need to know so they haven’t been top priority. He glances over at Damen and who seems to realize Laurent doesn't understand so he reluctantly translates for him. 

"He uses other stuff sometimes," Laurent says, attempting to get his point across. He doesn't know if Nik understands Veretian but he puts no effort in to try and help Laurent out with his Akielon.

"Your boyfriend is functional on anything else, he gets shit done on coke most of the time. Yeah it's not good and I'd rather he stayed clean but he won't do that. But when he's using heroine he's not functional, he's literally worthless and I'm not fucking dealing with it again." There are a few words that Laurent doesn’t understand but he gets what Nik is trying to say. Damen took something that he shouldn’t have taken. If he keeps up with what he’s doing there’s no way Laurent can stay with him anymore, just as Nik doesn’t want to work with him. But Laurent doesn't understand what trigger him to do this. He seemed like he was doing fine just a few days ago and now he’s here, doing something destructive that he hasn’t done in a long time.

"Why did you get high?" He asks Damen. Damen rolls his eyes and glares at Nik.

"You see what you fucking did?" Damen spits at Nik, avoiding the question.

"I didn't do shit, you’re the one that fucked up." Nik yells back. Laurent came here to see Damen, he’s getting tired of listening to this bickering. Damen did this to himself, Nik told him because he needed to. Nik turns back to Laurent and stares. "Do you get high with him?"

“No, I don’t do that.” 

“You sure? Because he’s been fine for a long time but now that you’re around he’s suddenly using again.” 

“I don’t fuck with that stuff. If Damen doesn’t quit, we are done.” Laurent spits, feeling Damen’s eyes burn through him but he doesn’t look. Nik stares like he doesn’t believe anything Laurent says but he doesn’t argue.

"Nik, if you don't leave him alone and get out of here I'm going to kick your ass." Damen mumbles. 

"Go ahead and try." Nik laughs again. “You couldn’t lift a finger against me right now.”

"Both of you shut up. Nik if you're here for something do it and leave, I need to talk to Damen." Laurent says. They both give him a strange look and then look back at each other. Neither of them are used to someone telling them what to do so it sounds strange coming from Laurent. 

"You heard him." Damen eventually says.

"Since when does this child have the authority to tell me what to do." Nik spits back. Laurent hates Nik calling him that but telling him to stop wouldn’t do much good. 

"Since now." Nik glares at him but turns to face Laurent. 

“Fine, then if you’re going to sit here and act like you can boss me around then go get me what I need.” He sits down in his chair again and crosses his arms over his chest. Laurent is so tired of Nik being here he wishes he’d just leave without all of this.

“What do you need?” Laurent asks. Why would Laurent know where to get what he wants? Just because he told Nik to leave doesn’t mean he can help with anything.

“You get to figure that out.” He spits. Laurent looks over at Damen for help but he just watches to see what Laurent does. Nik is obviously here to pick something up and if Damen isn’t trying to stop him from yelling at Laurent then he’s obviously supposed to do something. The only place he knows that Damen hides things is under the cabinet in the kitchen. Nik is getting impatient so Laurent walks over to the kitchen and Damen nods to him. When he opens the cabinet door and pull away the panel at the top, bundles similar to the one Damen had let him see before fall out on the floor. Nik just stares at him shocked that he knew where to find it. He was sure that Laurent didn’t know anything about what Damen does. “So the kid works for you now?”

“Why would I make the guy I’m dating work for me?” Damen finally gets up from the chair and falls down in the bed next to him. “Get your shit and get out Nik, that should be all I owe you.”

“You’re fucking pathetic,” Nik mumbles to himself as he gathers the bundles laying at Laurent’s feet. 

“I don’t even work for him and I’m a better help than you.” There was no reason to say anything else, Laurent doesn’t know why he said it but it just slipped out. Nik is definitely one of the people that Damen told Laurent he didn’t want him to meet and he decided to talk back to him.

“What the fuck did you say to me?” Damen shoots Laurent a look telling him not to answer. But at this point, Damen should know better than to think Laurent could ever keep his mouth shut. 

“Where were you when he was stabbed a few days ago?” Laurent asks. “Or even before that when he knew someone was going to hurt him? Because from my memory, it was me he took with him to hide and it was my place he came to crash after he was stabbed.”

“Laurent please, now is not the time for this.” Damen groans. 

“I was busy doing my own shit you think I have time to just sit around here and watch over your boyfriend? I don’t work for him.”

“No need to watch over him, but he was stabbed and needed help and who did he come to? Not you that’s for sure.” Nik steps right up to Laurent and doesn’t give him any time to react before he punches him right in the face. Laurent is so taken back by it he barely even move away, he just braces for another hit to come. But before that can happen Damen gets up and steps between them so Nik can’t reach Laurent anymore. After that Laurent will definitely have a bruise under his eye tomorrow. 

“You don’t know anything about me. You don’t know the shit I’ve gone through for him.” He shoves everything in a bag and storms out, slamming the door shut behind him. 

“Glad you remembered where I keep things. He already doesn’t like you, he would have attacked both of us if you didn’t know what you were talking about.” Damen stands on weak legs but doesn’t show himself faltering. More than just arguing happened before Laurent got there. When Nik found out what Damen had done he tried to fight him, which was more Nik kicking Damen’s ass and Damen laying on the floor trying to defend himself. But that’s not something he should mention. Laurent would say something dumb again next time he sees Nik if he knew.

“Probably should have kept my mouth shut.” Laurent mumbles, nursing the eye that Nik just punched. Damen takes a second to look at Laurent’s eye but he must decide that it’s not a big deal because he turns away and falls back into bed. 

“No shit.” Damen says, switching back to Veretian for Laurent. He’d prefer to speak in his own language but Laurent is not fluent in it yet so it’s just more convenient for both of them to speak Veretian. “There’s a reason I don’t want you around this and that’s half because I know you can’t shut up long enough to think about what you’re saying.”

“Who is he?” Laurent questions. Nik seemed more like an upset friend than someone who just sells with Damen. He said he’s been there before when Damen used so they must have known each other for a long time. 

“An old friend, he does a lot of the same things I do. He lives in Akielos though, he’s the one that sends things across the border for me.” 

“Shitty choice in friends.” Laurent jokes. Damen would almost agree with that statement if he didn’t think Laurent deserved what he got. That’s what he gets for not keeping his mouth shut. Nik’s not a bad person once you get to know him.

"Get in bed." He mutters. Laurent wasn't planning to stay the night but he doesn't want to leave Damen alone. He has work in the morning but he’s more afraid that Damen might do something else regrettable to care. "Laurent. Now or go home I don't care anymore I just want to try to sleep."

“Where have you been? You just disappeared without an explanation.” This is the real reason Laurent is here. Days without returning calls or being at his motel with no explanation is irritating.

“At my apartment, I didn’t want you to know where I was,” Damen says. “You would have talked too much.”

“Look I know you haven’t been in a relationship in a while and I know I haven’t been in one before but I’m pretty sure that’s not too healthy.”

“Neither is using drugs.” Damen chuckles.

"What happened to you?" Laurent walks over and sits down next to him. He’s still angry so he just rolls his eyes because Laurent isn’t doing exactly what he says. 

"It doesn't matter now, I'm fine." Laurent reaches up to brush his hair off of his forehead. Damen closes his eyes under Laurent’s touch but the anger doesn’t leave.

"Damen, why did you do that?" He sighs and tries to push Laurent off of him. "Did something happen?”

“I’m an idiot is what fucking happened.” He holds an arm out for Laurent but he stays in his place on the side of the bed. “Please just shut up and let me sleep.”

“It’s only been a few days since the last time I saw you, how did you get to this point so fast.” He seemed like he was doing okay then but now, maybe Laurent was wrong. Maybe Damen hasn’t been doing well for a while now and he just didn’t notice. 

“I get high all the time what are you talking about? I’m at this point because I’ve been getting high a lot recently and I felt like I needed something else. Like I said, I’m an idiot so now that we’ve acknowledged it let me go to sleep.” Damen drops his arm again when Laurent doesn’t move to lay with him. 

“I told you I won’t deal with a fucking junkie.” Laurent says. This is starting to get to be too much for Laurent to deal with. He was okay when it felt like Damen was just selling and he didn’t have to feel involved in this. 

“Seriously, get out if you’re going to be like this. I don’t need this from you too. This was a one time thing, I’m an idiot and I made a mistake that doesn’t make me a junkie.” Damen spits. 

“Are you going to use again?” Laurent asks. In frustration Damen rolls his eyes and groans at him. 

“If you don’t shut the fuck up, yes.” He spits. He sees Laurent glare at him and he sighs. “No, I’m not going to use again, I’m going to try and get clean. From everything, I’m not going to use anymore.” 

“How did you get clean last time?”

“My ex-girlfriend made me get clean,” Laurent assumes he’s referring to the same girlfriend that slept with his brother. “That was her one condition for us to be together.”

“So you were clean when you were with her?” Laurent questions. If he can get clean for someone else, maybe he would get clean for Laurent.

“For a while yeah.” His face is pressed into the pillows so his voice is muffled. As they talk he pulls the blankets up around him, something he has regularly refused to do even when Laurent is freezing. If he covers up with all of the blankets like this then there’s something wrong. 

“Would you get clean for me too?” Laurent asks. He turns his head slightly to look up at him. There are dark circles under his eyes and his skin look ashen. 

“Of course, Laurent.” He finally says speaking up. “You’re a lot better than she was, you know.”

“Well, I’d hope so.” Laurent certainly wouldn’t fuck Damen’s brother so he’d hope Damen thought he was a least a little better than her. Finally, Damen smiles and nods, holding an arm out for Laurent again. “I’d never fuck your brother.”

“Please, can we talk tomorrow? I just want to go to sleep now.” With that Laurent kicks off his shoes and lays down next to Damen. Damen immediately pulls Laurent to him and against his burning hot skin so he can’t move away. “Fuck you’re so warm.”

“So are you.” Damen mumbles something in agreement and closes his eyes. Something is very wrong, but Laurent has no idea what he’s supposed to do. There has to be a better reason that Damen decided to fall back into these old habits.


	15. Chapter 15

Laurent rolls over in bed and runs into Damen’s side. To get more comfortable and to not disturb Damen who is still sleeping, Laurent rearranges himself so his head is on Damen’s shoulder with his arm still around Laurent’s side. Damen’s other arm lay straight out next to him but it’s what Laurent sees that makes his heart sink. On his inner arm, he sees the needle mark from last night’s events. He told Laurent what happened but actually seeing the marks from it makes him feel different. There’s time where he can pretend that what’s happening isn’t real and Damen doesn’t touch this sort of thing but seeing the marks from it makes the whole thing feel so much more real.

"What are you doing?" Damen mumbles as Laurent runs his fingers over the mark. His voice is rough and he doesn't open his eyes but he moves his arm to get Laurent’s hand off. Laurent refuses to pull away though and just waits for Damen’s eyes to open, after another minute they do. "Stop."

"I was hoping you were lying to me last night."

"Why would I lie about something like that." He closes his eyes again and rubs them with this hand, pulling his arm out of Laurent’s grip.

"Why would you do that to yourself anyway?" Laurent asks. Damen stays silent and ignores him. "Exactly."

"Don't you have work? Or someone else to go bother." Damen spits.

"Says the one that made me spend the night with him last night."

"Laurent, go to work." He rolls away so his back is facing Laurent. He's right, Laurent does have to go to work but he’s so afraid of leaving Damen that he doesn't want to move.

“I’ll be back later.” Damen grunts in response and pulls the blanket up. “Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

“Go away.” Damen mumbles. “I’ll be fine, just go away.”

It’s early enough Laurent has time to run home to shower and get ready before he has to be at work. His eye isn’t as bad as he was afraid it might turn out. Underneath the outside corner is a small purple bruise that is not swollen and is just slightly tender to the touch. It is small enough that it could easily be covered up if he had the stuff to cover it with. Luckily most people don’t know that Laurent is seeing Damen or they might ask questions about where the bruise came from. 

At his office building it’s quiet this early on a Friday morning. People trickle in slowly but people stay fairly quiet compared to normal. Everyone just wants to get through the day to make it to the weekend. Laurent closes his office door to avoid any unnecessary questions even if he knows the first person to see him is going to ask about the bruise. Thankfully he doesn’t have very much to worry about today so he has the chance to relax a little from Damen last night. The day drags on slowly but no one comes in to bother Laurent so it’s not hard avoiding questions. 

At lunch he decides to eat lunch at his desk because by then his head is pounding. He doesn’t really have anything left to do for a while but he doesn’t want to leave early. He’ll have more to do later in the day and leaving now would mean more work to do tomorrow. But his headache is completely debilitating so he turns the lights off and sits in the dark waiting for it to pass. Painkillers don’t even touch the pain he’s feeling. It’s the knock at the door that wakes him up from almost falling asleep. 

“Come in.” Laurent glances up and see Ancel walk in. He’s fairly new to the office but he has the most confidence out of everyone. Just because Laurent hasn’t had to yell at him before he thinks he’s better than everyone else. “What do you need?”

“I have the reports you asked for.” He stands awkwardly by the door in the dark.

“Turn the light on and bring them to me.” He flips the switch on and Laurent flinches hard at the light. Ancel walks right up to his desk and tosses the papers down.

“Have a seat then.” Laurent mumbles. He sits down in the seat quietly and smiles. He might as well sit here while Laurent goes over these so he doesn’t have to call him back later. 

“Hangover?” Ancel asks. Laurent shoots him a look to shut him up but it doesn’t work. “Have you taken anything for that?”

“It’s a migraine not a hangover. Be quiet please.” Laurent says, focusing on the papers again.

“Of course,” He stares at Laurent’s eye like he wants to ask about it but even he knows better than to ask questions.

“Go ahead and ask if you’re gonna to ask.” Laurent glances up and see his cheeks turn pink. Ancel is younger than Laurent and still had many delicate and boyish features. His hair is strikingly red and his eyes a beautiful green, he is a pretty boy but he wasn’t the type to catch Laurent’s eye. “I’m not going to yell at you. Ask now or you and your nosey friends won’t get another chance.”

“What happened to your eye?” 

“I got punched.” Laurent doesn’t look up from the papers so he doesn’t notice Ancel’s concern. The only person anyone here has seen Laurent interact with is Damen the one time he showed up here. So Ancel assumes the worst of Laurent’s relationship. 

“By who?”

“Not sure. He was being an idiot, I said something and got punched.” He glances up and manages to smile. “Probably should have kept my mouth shut.”

“Okay, can I ask another question then?” Ancel asks. Laurent sighs and rubs his eyes, giving a small nod. Might as well answer them now rather than later. “Everyone assumed you didn’t date until now.”

“What makes you think I’m dating anyone now then?”

“Last week you left here with some guy.” That’s Damen’s fault for showing up here. They wouldn’t know anything if up to Laurent so Damen can’t say anything about this. 

“And?”

“Well, and that too,” Ancel motions towards the mark on Laurent’s neck. “You’re telling me you’re not fucking him? He’s hot and into you, why not?”

“You can think what you like about my sex life, that’s really none of your business.”

“So you’re not dating him then?” Ancel frowns. Of course Ancel would hope Laurent was dating Damen. Laurent is intolerable, the possibility of someone helping to lighten him up a little probably sounds too good to be true. Which it is, Laurent has been worse since he’s been with Damen, but of course none of them know that. 

“You’re pushing your limits now don’t you think?”

“You said I could ask.” Laurent stops working and look up at him. Ancel doesn’t look away this time so Laurent drops his pen and walk around the desk to stand closer to him. He leans back so he’s sitting against the edge of the desk with his legs stretched out in front of him. Ancel is confused by Laurent’s attitude today but why not answer some questions.

“You’re right I did.” I say. “I don’t know if I’m with that guy or not anymore.”

“Did something happen?”

“Sort of, something I’m not sure I’m ready to forgive. That’s enough questions. Get out.” Ancel quickly gets up and hurries out. That’s something that Laurent hadn’t even admit to himself yet. But if Damen doesn’t promise to change something, then they can’t be together anymore. Only a little while longer before he can go check up on Damen. He doesn’t want to deal with this anymore but today he needs to make sure Damen is at least alive first.

When Laurent walks through the building to leave, everyone stares at him as usual. But now Laurent knows what they think about him, not that it matters though. They can think whatever they like about Laurent as long as they don’t bring it to his face or let it interrupt their work. Someone tries to stop him for something but he doesn’t have time for that so he brushes them off and keeps going. The drive to the motel is short enough Laurent is at his door before he’s ready and he is nervous about possibly finding him high again.

Laurent isn’t in the mood to wait for Damen so he knocks on the door and open it before Damen has the chance to open it for him. He walks in on Damen sitting at the edge of the bed and Nik sitting in a chair facing him. 

"Hey, kid," Nik says over his shoulder. Laurent’s heart drops at the sight of him but he glances over at Damen and he doesn't look a mess this time. He’s wearing his jacket open with no shirt underneath of it though which itself is a little strange. The hat on his head hides the messiness of his hair. "I'm here for something else, your boyfriend isn't high."

“Come here, Laurent.” Damen holds out an arm so Laurent walks over to sit down next to him. While Laurent loves listening to Damen talk in his own language, it feels like every time he does there’s something wrong. He kisses the side of Laurent’s head and wraps an arm around his waist. “How was work?”

“Fine, what’s going on here?” Laurent mumbles. He looks over at Nik who just rolls his eyes at them. “Why is he here?”

“Working,” Damen mumbles into the side of Laurent’s hair.

“Am I doing this with him here then?” Nik asks. Damen nods and squeezes his arm tighter around Laurent’s waist so he can’t move. Nik stays quiet as Damen continues kissing the side of Laurent’s face and trying to turn his head to kiss him. “Would you not fuck him right in front of me then?”

“Fuck off, just tell me what you need to say,” Damen says, but he stops trying to kiss Laurent and pays attention to what Nik wants to say.

“Aimeric is a little snitch and he’s pissing me off. You do something about that kid or I will.” Nik eventually says, keeping his eyes on Laurent.

“I put him up to it.” He says. “He was told to get close to Jord. I needed someone to keep an eye on him and the rest of those guys that keep fucking things up for me.”

“I think he’s doing more than just getting close to that guy. I don’t trust him.”

“So you’re the guys my brother talks about?” Laurent asks. Nik looks at him in shock and then to Damen, suddenly furious. Damen sighs in frustration that Laurent still couldn’t manage to keep his mouth shut around Nik. 

“Is this kid’s brother a fucking cop?” Nik asks raising his voice.

“Yes, it’s fine. Laurent won’t say anything to him. Isn’t that right sweetheart?”

“I’m not going to say anything to him. But my brother talks about you guys a lot.”

“And what does he say?” Damen questions. 

“There’s been a lot more coke in the area recently and I know he’s arrested a few guys but he’s still trying to figure out where it’s all coming from. Which I guess, is from you.” Laurent says in Veretian. If he’s going to making this understandable it needs to be in his own language. Nik still stares at him hesitantly. Why would Laurent tell them all the information Auguste has worked so hard on for months now if this wasn’t a trick. “I think he said there’s some house that he’s been looking into.”

“House?” Damen asks. “How much does he know about the house?”

“If it’s your house I’d be concerned.” Auguste mentioned how many people he’s seen going in and out of there despite it being abandoned. Laurent even caught the end of a conversation between Jord and Auguste about how the case was taken away from them when the narcotics team caught on to how big this case is. Laurent doesn’t tell Damen all of this though, he told him that he should be nervous and that’s enough.

“Glad to see you have this kid working for you, this is going to be helpful.” Nik says. This is the first time Laurent has heard him speak Veretian. His accent is thick but it’s fluent and clear just as Damen. 

“I don’t work for him.” Laurent spits back. 

“Whatever you need to tell yourself kid, but you definitely are.” Nik finally smiles at him for a second.

“I do not work for him, if I helped him out then that’s all. It doesn’t mean I work for him.”

“He looks more like your pimp right now than your boyfriend.” Nik says. He’s right, with this strange outfit choice for tonight he doesn’t look like the type of person that dates someone like Laurent. Laurent is not unaware of his looks, he’s heard the comments people make about him. Tonight Damen looks like all the other men that talk about fucking Laurent behind the bar until he begs for mercy. He looks like that most of the time anyways, the outfit choice just adds to it.

“No, I don’t.” Damen spits.

“Yes, you do,” Laurent says back. 

“See, even the kid agrees.” Nik laughs. Laurent hates that nickname but he doesn’t care for Nik enough to tell him not to call him that. Damen rolls his eyes but doesn’t argue anymore. “I’m leaving, I’ll clear out the house. You take care of Aimeric.” 

“I’ll talk to him, he’s done some dumb shit I should have killed him for but I don’t think he’s done anything wrong.” Damen says. Even now, just about two weeks after the night Aimeric drugged Laurent for no reason, Damen gets visibly angry talking about it. Nik gets up and without another work he walks out. The two of them stay silent for a minute, Laurent has no words to say to him. 

“I just betrayed my brother for you.” He eventually says. 

“You helped me out a lot though, thank you.” He says. 

“My brother works hard for information like that, you fuck up again and get high like that I won’t hesitate to tell him everything I know about you.”

“That’s not the best encouragement to stay sober.” He finally stands and walks over to shed his coat onto the table. 

“If I would have been here do you still think you would have used?” He stops in his tracks and turns back to face Laurent. 

“I don’t know, it probably wouldn’t have happened at the time that it did but as soon as you left me alone I probably still would have done what I did. You couldn’t have watched me forever.” He walks back over and drops to his knees in front of Laurent, placing both of his hands on Laurent’s thighs. “Please, don’t think about it like that. I fucked up yeah, but that’s not your fault.”

“I was just curious.” Laurent does feel guilty. He knows it’s not his fault but he still feels the guilt like somehow he could have prevented it. 

“I’m really sorry that Nik hit you.” he reaches up and runs his thumb under the bruise. He looks upset and guilty for what happened.

“He’s an asshole.” That instantly brings a smile to Damen’s face. 

“So am I.” 

“Yeah but I can tolerate you. I hate him.” Damen laughs and pulls him to hug him. “I have to go home. Are you alright?”

“If you’re trying to ask if I’m going to use tonight, I’m not going to don’t worry.” He stands up with Laurent but pulls him for a hug before he can walk away. He squeezes Laurent tight and refuses to let go for a long time. Laurent’s head still aches so after a while he can’t stand being touched like this anymore. 

“Damen I really need to go home now, my head hurts.” Damen drops his arms from around Laurent but grabs his hands instead. The hat on Damen’s head hides most of his hair but a few strands peek out in all different directions. Looking directly at his face now Laurent can see that he really doesn’t look a whole lot better from yesterday. His color isn’t as pale as before but he still has dark circles under his eyes. 

“Go home and rest, thank you for everything today.” Damen kisses the top of Laurent’s head and leads him outside. He stands outside and watches as Laurent drives off. This morning when he woke up he was rude and insensitive to Laurent, but now he’s being sweet and overly loving. If Laurent didn’t know what Damen acted like when he’s high he would have assumed he used again. But this is different, this feels to Laurent like he’s trying to make us for all the things he’s done. 

Back home Laurent wanders inside slowly, praying Auguste won’t have anyone over to make him talk. He’s exhausted and socializing with more people tonight isn’t anything he cares to do. The headache from earlier is still there but, thankfully, starting to calm down slightly. 

“What the fuck?” Auguste says as soon as he sees Laurent walk inside. He completely forgot that Auguste hasn’t seen his eye yet. “Laurent! What happened to you?”

“Nothing, don’t worry.” Laurent brushes past him but of course Auguste stops him to talk. When he finally gets the chance to look directly at Laurent’s face he looks horrified. It’s really not that bad, the bruise is small and mainly focused under his eye. 

“Who hurt you?”

“No one, Aug, I promise.”

“Who hit you? Was it the guy you’re seeing? Tell me his name right now.” Auguste grabs Laurent by his shoulders when he tries to pull away.

“No, no it wasn’t him. He stopped the guy that hit me, he didn’t do this.” Auguste let’s go of Laurent’s arms but he doesn’t walk away. “I made a bad choice talking back to someone I shouldn’t have.”

“Who did this? I’m not going to let you keep this a secret.”

“The guy I’m seeing stays at this shady place. There was someone outside being an asshole and I said something I shouldn’t have and he hit me.” Laurent manages to lie.

“You shouldn’t go over there anymore.” 

“I’m twenty-three years old you don’t get to tell me what to do anymore.” Auguste tries to stop Laurent again but he shoves past into his room and slams the door shut.


	16. Chapter 16

Laurent opens his front door and stares, in shock, at Damen standing in front of him with a bouquet of roses. His hair is styled nice, he wears a button-up black shirt, and the color is his skin is back to normal. He hands the flowers over to Laurent who still can’t wrap his mind around what’s happening.

"What are these for?" Laurent eventually asks. His cheeks flush but he tries to pretend he's not flustered.

"Am I not allowed to get something for you?"

"I've never had flowers before." He blushes. Damen smiles and backs him inside so they can close the door. Auguste’s car wasn’t outside so Damen took the chance to come see Laurent tonight. He took a risk and he has no idea what made him do it. But he’s made Laurent deal with a lot more than he’s willing to put up with lately and he needs to make it up to him. “You came through the front door too.”

“I cleared my plans, I’m here with you all night if that’s okay with you of course.”

“I would be alright with that,” Laurent says trying not to smile. “Auguste won’t be here for the rest of the night anyways.”

“Perfect. What would you like to do then?”

“You’re the one who came over here. Didn’t you think of anything on your way over?” Laurent walks away from Damen into his room so Damen follows along behind him, tossing his bag on the bed. 

“What were you going to do if I didn’t come over tonight?”

“I don’t know, shower and read probably. What else would I do on a Monday night?” He puts the flowers into a cup he fills with water and puts it down on a dresser. “You realize I don’t do much.”

“Well, let’s do that then,” Damen says. “Let me take a bath with you and relax.”

“You don’t need to agree to such boring plans. You have any better ideas let’s do that.” Laurent says with flushed cheeks. 

"Start the water," Damen says to him. Laurent steps away from him to start the bath water and add in some soaps. When he stands back up to face Damen, he starts to unbutton Laurent’s shirt. 

“How’s the stab wound.” 

“Healed enough to take a bath with you, why are you changing the subject?”

“Very different from my original plans for tonight.” He tries to joke. He’s always so nervous around Damen, no matter what he does. “This is new for you, coming in my apartment through the front door like an actual person. Not whispering behind closed doors.”

"Get in the bath." Damen glances over and quickly turn the water off when he realizes how high the water has gotten. Laurent stares at him not sure if he wants to continue whatever this talk was supposed to lead to. 

"Damen-"

"Get in the bath, your highness." He nods and does as he is told but reaches out to grab Damen’s hand as he sits. "Don't worry, I'm coming. Can’t let you have all the fun without me."

Damen slides down to sit behind him and Laurent immediately leans back into him. The water is a little too hot and burns their skin but neither of them flinch. They lay enjoying each other’s company for a long while. Neither of them feel the need to talk which is a nice change for once. There’s no arguing between the two, there’s no uncomfortable stares at injuries. Just the occasional hum of happiness or a soft touch in acknowledgement. 

“The flowers are nice, Damianos.” Laurent mumbles. 

“I have some Akielon coffee to make for you later if you wanted. You seemed to really enjoy it last time you came over.” Damen trails his finger down the front of Laurent’s chest to follow the trail of faded purple marks he made. Not all of them are still there but enough to show the path Damen took down Laurent’s chest. It’s surprising to Damen that any of them are still visible at all. His skin is so delicate and light that broken blood vessels like this take a lot longer to disappear than on Damen’s skin tone. Any marks Damen has had before fade to nothing within a few days. 

"What is this all for?" He mumbles. The water is so high they both have to be cautious when moving around so the water does splash out. When Damen’s hands wander a little too much for Laurent to handle he grabs his hands and holds them in his, resting them on the front of his chest. Damen is fine with this though and they both sit contently again. 

"I've been a dick lately, I want to make it up to you. You told me what you wouldn’t deal with in this relationship and I’ve broken that, I’m sorry." Laurent turns around to face Damen so fast some water splashes out on the floor next to them. He sits in Damen’s lap with his knees in between Damen’s. He wraps his arms around Damen’s neck and sits up slightly so he is taller. In shock Damen sits up straighter, forcing his eyes to stay focused on Laurent’s face so they don’t wander to places they shouldn’t be. His hands grip the sides of the tub when he has no place to put them. “Careful now sweetheart.”

“You came here with flowers and foreign coffee expecting this to make up for everything?”

“No, I know it doesn’t. But I had to do something nice for you.”

“Having you stay clean would be a nice thing.” He moves to lean back on the other side of the tub facing Damen. When Damen tries to adjust Laurent presses a foot against his chest to keep him down. “If this is a bribe to make me forget about what you did, I don’t want it.”

“What? No, it’s not a bribe I wouldn’t bribe you.” Damen sees Laurent’s cheeks flush lightly but he doesn’t let it affect his glare. 

“Then your sobriety would mean more to me than any of this. I want that more than your fucking coffee.” Laurent drops his eyes to some bubbles floating on the top of the water. When Damen tries to sit up to talk, Laurent pushes him back down with his foot again. “Have you used since the last time I saw you?”

“No, you don’t want that so I haven’t. Nik is already pissed off I don’t want to make things worse with him too.”

“I guess that’s one thing Nik and I agree on.”

“I know, I’m trying I promise, okay? I don’t even have anything on me tonight.”

“You normally have something on you in my apartment?” Laurent questions. “You do remember my brother is a cop, right? Not the best place to be doing drugs.”

“I sell, obviously I have something on me most of the time,” Damen says. Laurent nods in response. “I’m trying Laurent, can we talk about something else.”

“Are you ever going to quit selling?”

“I don’t know, probably not. This is all I’ve ever really done, what else would I do?” Laurent rolls his eyes and throws an arm over the edge of the tub.

“You could get a normal job like everyone else.” He spits back.

“Do you really think I would be good at a normal job?” He falls quiet for a minute and just stares over at Damen. “If you want me to quit, I don’t know maybe I could figure it out.”

“I want coffee.” He suddenly says. Laurent can tell when Damen is lying and he doesn’t want to hear it from him tonight. The only problem is that Damen wasn’t lying when he said he’s stop if that’s what Laurent wanted. He would do anything Laurent told him to do at this point. 

“It’s in my bag.” He nods and gets out of the bath before Damen can move, leaving Damen alone to drain the tub and find where Laurent ran off to. Laurent ran off so quickly without Damen, he left Damen eager to go see Laurent. He’s in too much of a hurry to really get dressed so he just slip on his boxers, seeing most of Laurent’s clothes still lying on the floor of the bathroom. He walks out of Laurent’s room, nervous that he might run into Auguste but too focused on Laurent to think too much about it. Laurent, he’s all Damen can think about, he’s all he wants to think about. He should be focused on killing Laurent right now. He’s already been with him for much longer than he has anyone else and it’s starting to make him nervous. He could easily do it tonight, but Damen doesn’t want that. Laurent makes him feel different than any of the others did and he can’t figure out why. He could just not kill Laurent. Stay in this town and meet Auguste. Stop selling and get a real job like Laurent wants for him. Damen could do that, and it makes him nervous when he realizes how nice that really sounds to him.

Damen finds Laurent in the kitchen finishing up making a pot of the coffee he brought. When he sees Damen walk out he looks back with a smile on his face. The buttons on his shirt are undone so it sits open showing off his chest. His legs look smooth and slender with only his boxers on. Damen is in such a daze seeing Laurent so casually dressed like this he has to take a second to stare at him. 

“You’re staring.” 

“You’re hot.” Damen mumble.

“I’m just making coffee.” Damen pulls Laurent's back against his chest. He smiles and pours coffee into two mugs for them. Damen hums happily into Laurent’s shoulder. 

“I don’t care.”

"You're going to have to let me go if you want to drink your coffee." He says. But Damen places quick rough kisses on Laurent’s neck and hold his waist tighter. Laurent laughs a little and squirms in Damen’s grip, that's when they hear the front door shut.

"Um, hello?" Auguste says behind them. They both spin around to look at him, one of Damen’s hands still on Laurent's lower back.

"Auguste," Laurent says breathlessly. "I thought you wouldn't be home tonight."

"I.. I wasn't going to be. I see I'm interrupting something." Auguste looks between the two, confused. Damen takes his hand away from Laurent's back and they all stand staring at each other not knowing what to say or do. "So you're the one fucking my brother?"

"Uh, yes." This isn't supposed to be happening, Auguste isn't supposed to ever see Damen’s face.

"Much larger than I assumed you'd be." He jokes. "I don't know if Laurent has mentioned me or not, he hasn’t really mentioned you. I'm Auguste, his older brother. What's your name?"

"Damen." He walks forward and shakes Damen’s hand. Laurent suddenly realizes that his shirt is open exposing all of the fading little purple bruises left over his chest in the past few days. He quickly pulls his shirt shut and Auguste just smiles and looks away.

"So, why don't you both get dressed so we can talk." He looks away from them, still confused as to what going on, and turns to walk out of the kitchen. Damen looks down at Laurent who's now standing behind him with his cheeks bright pink. When Laurent doesn’t move Damen takes his hand and they walk back into his bedroom. Laurent just walks in ahead of Damen to sit on the edge of the bed.

“I swear I didn’t know he was coming home.” Damen turns to look at him just staring at the window instead of getting dressed. “If I knew he was coming, we would have been fully clothed.”

"I'm not mad at you, it's not your fault." Laurent looks up at Damen, who gives him a forced smile. But Laurent still feels weird about it and can’t manage to shake the embarrassment. 

"It was going to happen at some point though," Laurent says quietly. “This isn’t how I thought it’d happen.”

"You're right, now get dressed your brother wants to talk." He stares at Damen for a minute and nods. Damen decides not to wait for Laurent so he walks out without him. Auguste looks up at Damen from his chair and gives an uncomfortable smile. "Sorry we've never had the chance to meet before, I don't like to meet families until things get a little more serious."

"So are you his boyfriend or what is this?" Auguste asks right away.

"Yes, I'm his boyfriend." Damen sits down on the couch and waits for more questions. This feels like a bad dream to Damen, sitting in front of Auguste answering questions he doesn’t feel comfortable talking about.

"Good, he needs someone in his life."

"I agree," Damen says. Auguste smirks, this is just as strange for him as it is for Damen. 

"How long have you two been together?" Forty-six days exactly, but that's not something a person would normally know. 

"Like a month and a half," Damen says. Auguste looks at him and laughs.

"If you've been fucking my brother for that long I'm offended neither of you thought I'd like to meet you. For Laurent, a month and a half is serious. I’d say a week would be serious for him." He chuckles. "Look, Laurent has been through a lot and I wasn’t there for him then so I will not let anyone hurt him again."

"Auguste, stop." Laurent spits when he walks out. He makes his way out of his room and sits down right next to Damen. "Don't talk about that."

"I'm sorry, I was just-"

"He already knows." He says softly. Auguste looks at them in shock. "He doesn't need to hear about it again."

"What happened was unthinkable and it’s a good thing I didn't know Laurent then because I would be in prison, I would have killed that man." Damen says. It’s true, he’s with Laurent because he wants to kill him but if he knew something like that was happening to him there’s no way he would have stopped himself. Auguste nods when he can't find the words to say. No one likes to talk about this so he tries to change the subject.

“What happened to Laurent’s eye?”

“I’ve told you the answer to that.” Laurent spits back harshly. 

“I want to hear the answer from him.”

“I didn’t hit your brother,” Damen says flatly. He doesn’t know the story that Laurent told his brother so he needs to be careful how he answers. “I would never hit him.”

“Then what happened?” Auguste crosses his arms over his chest and shoots Laurent a look when he notices him getting ready to say something again. He doesn’t want to hear it from Laurent anymore, Damen needs to tell him what happened or it won’t count. 

“A friend of mine had stopped by and I wasn’t paying attention for a second and Laurent said something to him and got punched,” Damen says. He’s too far gone to tell a lie at this point. 

“Laurent said it happened outside.”

“It didn’t, it happened inside. I wasn’t feeling good that day and Laurent had come over to sit with me. I didn’t notice when they started arguing I should have paid better attention. He was a good friend, but after he touched Laurent there’s no way I can ever trust him again.” 

“If that happens again you two are done. Understand?” Damen nods and Auguste holds a finger out to Laurent when he tries to say something again. Talking to Auguste, Damen can see where Laurent gets a lot of his personality traits from. While Auguste uses them to make a point, Laurent uses them to get his way. It’s strange to see someone tell Laurent what to do like this and for him to actually listen.

“I understand, it’s not going to happen again.” 

"So, you have an accent, are you from Akielos?" He asks. Damen has spent years perfecting his Veretian so he can pretty much always pass, to the average person, as a native in either country. But there's no tricking either of these guys.

"I am," Damen says. 

"Are you done questioning him?" Laurent asks before Auguste has the chance to respond. Auguste chuckles a little and smiles at them.

"Laurent you've never had a boyfriend before, let me have some fun." Auguste laughs more when Laurent glares at him. “I have to give him a hard time.”

"You're a dick," The words roll off Laurent’s tongue in a tone Damen has never heard from him before. He's calm and joking around his brother, something he never is around Damen.

“I’ve heard so little about you, I’m almost glad I walked in on you two.” Laurent’s cheeks turn bright red and his head turns away from both of them. This is the first Damen is hearing about what Laurent has said to Auguste about himself. It makes Damen wonder how much Auguste actually knows already. "I get it, it's weird. But Laurent has never liked someone and who knows when he will let me talk to you again."

“It’s fine, I know you want to protect your brother.” He nods in agreement and they all fall silent.

"Well, I have to go to work. Do you need anything before I go Laurent?" He stands up and turns away from Damen finally to look down at his brother.

"I’m fine, go to work." Laurent says to try and get him to leave faster. Auguste just laughs and pulls Laurent up into a hug. The relationship between the two of them is always interesting to watch. Laurent lets his guard down around Auguste, so much more than he has around anyone else.

"I'm just messing with you kid. Be careful okay?" Laurent gives him a big smile and turns back to Damen. Auguste reaches out for another handshake and Damen has to do it even though the idea of it makes his skin crawl. He nods to Damen and walks out the front door. When the door closes behind him they stay silent for a minute, not knowing what to say to each other.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know he was coming home. I swear I thought he was supposed to be out all night. But that was going to happen at some point anyway wasn't it?" He mumbles again. “He needed to meet you soon.”

"Yeah, it's fine I told you I understand that." Damen needs to get out of here, he has to make an excuse so Laurent will let him leave and not be suspicious. Damen glances down at his phone and look up at Laurent, realizing a good enough excuse to get him out.

"Fuck. I'm sorry, Laurent, Nik needs help with something I have to go." He lies. 

“You told me you were here for the whole night.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I didn’t know Nik would need me. I swear I’ll make this up to you.” Damen needs to go see Auguste and Laurent can't know about it. Auguste saw him, there's no way he can go through with killing Laurent now or he will be his first suspect. He was thinking about the possibility of not killing Laurent, but now he doesn’t have the time to decide what he wants to do. Damen has to kill Auguste.


	17. Chapter 17

"Hey Auguste, wait up I need to talk to you." Damen jogs out to meet Auguste outside of the building. Luckily, Auguste must have taken his time getting downstairs so he is just making it to his car. 

"What's up?" He stops at his car and waits for Damen to run up. His body language is very relaxed and comfortable around Damen, he doesn't see him as a threat at all. Damen walks up until he’s only about a foot away from him. Close enough to see the gun and taser on his belt. 

"I was just going to ask you," before he can even react Damen grabs the taser from his belt and shoots Auguste in the side with it. He’s so caught off guard he falls to the ground below Damen. Damen uses this time to take the gun out of Auguste’s belt. A blow to his temple with the butt of his gun as he rolls over on his knees knocks him unconscious. A lucky break tonight, Auguste parked right next to Damen’s car. He carries Auguste over to his car. He can't risk him waking up so Damen stabs him in the side with a enough sedatives to keep him asleep for a while and ties his hands behind his back. For best measure Damen uses part of an old shirt to blindfold him and some tape to cover his mouth. Damen take his gun and taser and meticulously cleans off any fingerprints he might have left and tosses them in the front seat of Auguste’s car. He also takes off Auguste’s belt, badge, and phone and tosses them in his car as well, less chance of leaving evidence behind if he doesn’t carry anything Auguste owns. Damen takes a few minutes just sitting alone in his car. Laurent is going to be completely destroyed by Auguste’s death. Auguste is the only family that Laurent has left and Damen is about to selfishly steal that away from him. The thought of Laurent sobbing at the news of his brother’s death almost makes Damen change his mind on what he’s about to do, but it's too late for that. He can’t believe what he’s done but it’s too late to go back now. 

If he’s going to kill Auguste, the man that has been investigating the kills Damen has done, he needs to do it how the others died. He needs to confuse the detectives and make them believe that Auguste was with Damen as all the other victims have been. It’s over an hour drive away and Auguste should stay asleep for just barely that. What finally gets Damen moving is the fear of Auguste waking up before they get to the cabin. It takes him about half the trip there for him to finally start feeling the same things he used to feel. The anticipation of killing gets his adrenaline pumping and it doesn’t seem so impossible anymore.

When Damen pulls up outside of the cabin he’s so excited he almost jumps out of the car as soon as it stops. Auguste is thankfully still passed out in the back of Damen’s car, but he’s not certain how to get him inside. His usual type is smaller so he can easily carry them inside, but Auguste is just as tall as he is. Lifting him up is hard but eventually he gets him inside and onto the bed. Bed being a loose term considering it is more of a metal table lacking an actual mattress. Before anything, if he is going to kill Auguste like the others, he needs to be treated like the others. On his shoulder blade, Damen carves VIII, for his thirteenth kill. Laurent was supposed to be number thirteen, but Auguste has to take his place. His arms get tied above his head and his ankles to the end of the bed. The blindfold is removed but Auguste is still asleep. It irritates Damen that he hasn’t woken up yet but one look and he can tell Auguste should wake up soon enough. It’s chilly outside so Damen makes his way outside to get a bucket of water. He comes back in and pours it over Auguste’s head making him jump awake suddenly. He looks up at Damen, wide eyes, and terror on his face. It’s hard to describe the look of pure terror on a grown man’s face, but it Damen’s eyes it's one of the best things in the world. 

"Good morning, you slept for quite a while." Damen pulls the duct tape off of his mouth and he doesn't even say anything. "Oh? You don't have anything that you want to say to me? You don't care where you are?"

"What the hell are you doing?"

"You’re in my way now and you need to stop trying to find me." Auguste starts to notice the cut on his shoulder because he keeps trying to look back at it. "I know we just me, but you're special. I think I'll show you exactly how I killed them."

"Wait...You're the killer?" He seems so scared suddenly and it makes Damen feel really good. He knew this was going to be fun, even when he didn’t want to go through with this, but he didn't realize how good Auguste was going to make this for him. He grabs his camera and moves to straddle Auguste’s lap, catching him completely off guard. His hair drips water onto his shoulders and down the front of his shirt. Police uniforms might be attractive to some people but Damen finds them ugly and irritating. 

"I want this off." Damen pulls out his knife and cut his shirt off of him. He can't move or fight back so he just keeps his head turned away and lets Damen do it. He takes a picture of him and Auguste doesn't even look at the camera when he does it.

"Why are you doing this?" Auguste questions. The part of Auguste that has obsessed over Damen for so long is stronger than his fear right now. Damen takes a moment to roll up his sleeves. Today he wore a nice black dress shirt for Laurent, seems like a shame to ruin it. He usually wears cheap T-shirts that he doesn’t care about burning, this one seems almost too nice to ruin. 

"You've been investigating me." Damen trails the knife over his chest, following a drop of water as it rolls down his skin. "And then you saw me, now I can't possibly get away with killing your baby brother if you're alive now can I?"

"I swear to god, you won't get the chance to touch him if you kill me." He spits. “Laurent will know it was you.”

"Do you want me to tell you the truth about who your brother has been fucking?"

"I know who you are." Auguste spits. Damen makes the first cut across his chest, fast but shallow straight across a few inches under his collarbone. He grits his teeth and turns his head to the side to groan.

"No you don't, I've seen your work." Damen spits back, time to go over all that Auguste thought he knew. "First, my full name is Damianos. Your brother really seems to like it for some reason. You guessed mid-twenties, close enough, I'm twenty-eight. I'm originally from Ios in Akielos so the theory that I'm from Vere was wrong. Now my job, you really were pretty close when you said I'm a drug dealer. I'm more of what you’d call an importer. I bring coke in from Akielos and sell it to those men you’ve been tracking. I’ll bring in pretty much anything you can think of if the demand for it is high enough. I've gotten your brother high once before too."

"Do you like the sound of your own voice or something?" Auguste’s eye’s shoot up to look at Damen at the mention of his brother’s name. Damen frowns and cuts across his chest again, this time slightly deeper.

"I'm telling you a story, don't interrupt. My first was Jokaste, you've looked at her case before but you thought she might not be related. I was going to marry her, but one day I found her fucking my brother so I shot him in the face and then I killed her. So then I decided to start killing people for fun. I meet them alone somewhere first, your brother was at the club when you ran off with your friends and left him alone at the bar. I convince them to see me again but keep it quiet because ‘we should keep things just between us until it gets more serious’. If they find out I'm a dealer then I use that as an excuse not to tell anyone about me because ‘I could get them into trouble’. Here's the part I want you to explain to me. You thought maybe the reason people don't know about me in anyone's life is because I've only met the victims once before and maybe I've seen them a few other times. But how are you explaining that they don't put up a fight when I take them away, I know how to get into their houses."

"I didn't assume you could convince that many people to keep your existence quiet for that long."

"You underestimate my charm." He cuts across Auguste’s stomach this time and watches the blood run down. Damen has always been fascinated by how fast blood pools to the skin when cut. "I mean think about it, your little brother who hasn't been with a guy in his life, kept a secret from you, who he was constantly worried about disappointing. Either I am very charming or I fucked him that good."

Three more cuts to Auguste’s chest and his expression is starting to fail him. He groans loudly now and bites his lower lip each time he presses the knife in. He avoids looking Damen in the eyes so he brings the tip of the knife up to Auguste’s cheek. He doesn't turn his head back but his eyes dart over to look from the knife to Damen’s eyes. Damen smiles and makes a tiny cut across his face. 

“How do you know so much about my theories? Big fan of me then?” Auguste says breathlessly as he attempts to mask the pain.

“I fucked Laurent that night after we left the club and I knew I wanted to kill him. So I spent a week sneaking into your room to see if I could learn all that I needed about you. I still do it sometimes when I get the time. You’re a very interesting person.” Auguste tugs harder on the rope but they don’t budge. “Aimeric helped with that too. I learn lots of things when you let your guard down around anyone your friend fucks.”

“Aimeric?” Auguste says through clenched teeth when Damen slices through his chest again. The front of Auguste’s body is beginning to look redder than his usually pale skin tone. 

“You think you know who people are in your life but you know nothing.” Damen’s phone begins to ring but he tries to ignore it. “I’m in control of more than you will ever know.”

"Answer your damn phone." He mumbles.

"It's Laurent, would you like to talk to him?" It has to be him, Laurent is the only one that has this number. Auguste whimpers when Damen holds the knife right up to his throat and pull out his phone.

"I hate you so much." He mutters, just barely loud enough to hear. In response, Damen gives him a hard backhand across the face. 

Where are you? I need to talk to you.

He is so fucking needy, Damen told him he's not even supposed to text or call unless Damen does first. It annoys Damen so much that Laurent doesn't listen to anything that Damen tells him.

Stop texting me I'm busy.

"Laurent is a very needy boyfriend isn't he?"

"I swear if you hurt him.."

"Should I get him now? Then I could kill both of you at the same time and get it over with."

"Please, please don't hurt him. He's been through so much he doesn't deserve this." He's actually not trying to threaten Damen. It just makes Damen want to kill Laurent in front of him even more. “You can have me. Kill me and then move on like you always do, just don’t touch him.”

"Oh look, he wants to talk to me. Are you going to stay quiet or do I need to gag you?" He spits in Damen’s face which makes him so angry with Auguste he almost kill him right now. He grabs tape he already had ready and shove it over his mouth. "Now be quiet, you don't want to worry him. If he hears you then I will go kill him right now, understand?"

"Damen?" Laurent answers. Damen makes sure to put the phone on speakerphone so Auguste can hear him too.

"What do you need sweetheart? I'm kind of busy working right now."

"Auguste is missing, all of his things are still here in his car. Did you see anything weird when you left?" Auguste’s head jerks back up at Laurent’s words. “He wouldn’t just leave his phone like that.”

"No, I was going to talk to him but when I got downstairs he wasn't there. You don't think anything happened to him do you?" A tear rolls down Auguste’s cheek and he strains to come to take the phone from Damen.

"Can you come back over? I'm worried, what if something happened to him." Damen moves higher up so that his face is right above Auguste, who looks so angry with Damen but he can't do a thing to change it. “I know it’s dumb but I want to talk about it so I don’t panic.”

"I can't, Nik needs help and I owe him for helping me out already. He’d kill me if I tried to leave right now. Auguste is probably just out with a friend or something. I bet he's fine." Glancing down again at Auguste and he just glares. Damen takes his knife and slide it down his chest and he whimpers, trying not to give Damen the satisfaction of seeing him in pain.

"I'm sorry, I just miss you I guess."

"Let me make it up to you. I want to make my prince happy. I’ll come back over once I’m done here." Auguste pulls at the restraints harder and he digs the ropes further into his skin. Laurent groans a little at the nickname and it’s getting harder for Damen to not go get him so he can kill Laurent now too. This is the first time Auguste has really seen Laurent interact with someone like this and it’s probably weird to hear. "Don't worry about Auguste, I'm sure he's fine."

"I'm sure you're right, he's probably with a friend." Tears are running down Auguste’s face now and Damen can't help but run his knife over his chest again. The call ends and the tape is removed from Auguste’s mouth but he just lays weeping under Damen.

“You know I wasn’t going to do this. I needed a few days to think it over but I wasn’t going to kill him.” Damen says. “But then you showed up and you took that time to think away from me so here we are. You’re the reason your little brother is going to die soon.”

"I hate you, he's my little brother I'm supposed to protect him. I came home to talk to Laurent, I had time to kill. Fuck you," Auguste yells. The yelling is frustrating and not necessary so Damen presses the tip of the knife under Auguste’s chin until he closes his mouth. Damen runs his knife down under the chain on Auguste’s neck. “Don’t fucking touch that.”

“Oh, touchy subject I see? Was this your father’s or something.” Auguste jerks his head around until Damen drops it. 

“That’s none of your business.”

“I’ll make sure your brother gets this back then.” Damen runs the knife down to sit just below the end of the chain. A silver starburst hangs at the end of it, now coated red against his chest. “You’re never going to talk to him again, you’ll never get to see that friend of yours again, you’ll never fuck another guy.”

“I’m not gay, asshole.” He mumbles. 

"Come on now, it’s just us here, and neither of us really believe that." Damen watches the embarrassment grow on Auguste’s face and he can't help but chuckle. "You really think you're good at hiding it?"

"Laurent doesn't know yet, and he doesn't need to."

"Yes he does, I know a lot about you from my own research but Laurent is the one that told me you are gay." The blood drain from his face at the mention of Laurent knowing. "You're really not that good at hiding it sweetheart. What the hell is so shameful about being gay that you don't want anyone to know? You're little brother is gay, are you disgusted with him?"

"Because I'm not supposed to be gay!" Auguste shouts. "I'm supposed to be the one that carries on my family's bloodline. Laurent came out when he was young, we all knew he'd never want children anyways. My father made it very clear what was expected of me."

"That's not how it works though. If you're gay then be gay, don't sit there and cry about not liking tits because it won't get you anywhere. Your father is dead, he can’t control your entire life." Auguste looks away from Damen so he doesn’t have to deal with the burn of his eyes on him anymore. 

"How long has my brother known?" He asks. He's getting too calm so Damen slide the knife over his shoulder, he groans and pulls hard at the restraints but he doesn't scream.

"A while, I didn't get a specific time or anything but he's pretty confident in his assumptions about you so I'd say it's been a while." Auguste takes short shallow breaths trying to control the pain but it doesn’t seem to help him at all. “Are you really that embarrassed?”

“No, you took the chance for me to tell him myself away from me, you piece of shit.” Damen trails the knife down from his neck and over some cuts he made across his chest, not pressing hard enough to cut him but enough so the pressure against the open wounds is agonizing. More blood pours out of the cuts as he presses hard and now soaks Damen’s pants. Auguste whimpers and shifts around in place to distance himself in anyway from the pain but with the ropes plus Damen’s weight holding him down he can only manage a few minute changes. He whimpers again when Damen trails the knife along his skin right along the edge of his jeans. When Auguste makes eye contact with Damen the knife is pressed down hard so it slices deep into the skin. Blood pours out and pools up just below the knife. Something finally breaks him because when Damen holds up the knife to watch blood drip off the end of it Auguste starts sobbing. 

"You're fucking insane."

"You're just getting that now?" Damen sits back and stares at him, Auguste’s blood dripping from his arms. His skin looks pale and his eyes are starting to lose focus on Damen. Damen reaches up and slap his face hard, making his eyes shoot open to look at Damen and leaving a bloody handprint on his face. "Hey, don't fall asleep on me yet. I'm not done with you."

"What the hell is the point of this game? If you're going to kill me why don't you just do it?"

"Because I'm having fun." Damen presses the knife down again and he cries out. His voice is strangled and desperate. Auguste knows it’s coming soon his body feels weak and everything hurts. He’s ready for the end, but Damen just wants to drag it on longer.

“Just do it already,” Auguste says through cries. 

"Oh, there we go cry for me, where has that been? I thought you were stronger, you've proven me wrong though. I didn't think I could get you to cry, and I didn't think I would like this as much as I do." Damen laughs when Auguste’s eyes roll back in pain. “You remind me a lot of your brother.”

"You're a monster." He mumbles.

"Sweetheart, I already know." Damen leans in close so his lips are right by Auguste’s ear when he whispers to him. Neither one of them were expecting it when Damen quickly slides the knife all the way across his throat.

Damen step back and watch him try to grasp for his throat but the blood pours out faster than he could have even tried to stop. He's choking on his own blood, and Damen can't take his eyes off of him. He desperately looks at Damen, hoping that in some way he could or would help him. But he obviously wouldn't. 

When he finally stops moving his eyes shut, but Damen wants them open. His bright blue eyes are so beautiful on him. He normally doesn't enjoy killing someone he just met this much but Auguste has made it amazing. When the knife ran across Auguste’s neck blood sprayed out all over the front of Damen’s shirt. It’s not like he wasn’t already soaked in blood but it’s worse now than it was before. 

First thing to do now is take a picture. One before Auguste’s death and one after. Taking souvenirs is never as good as picture, a picture brings back a memory for Damen better than anything else could. However, the thought of keeping Auguste’s necklace is tempting. But Laurent would want to have it, and Damen still can’t bring himself to take that away from him. Second is to move the body and clean any evidence off of him Damen might have left. A tarp on the ground on the other side of the room works as a place to lay the body. The blood is wiped from his chest and any trace of Damen is meticulously cleaned off. When he is done Auguste’s body is moved, wrapped in the same tarp, into the trunk of Damen’s car. 

Next is to clean the blood from the room. It’s all over the bed and the floor, there’s even some smeared on the wall from Damen’s hand. In the cabin, Damen has a bucket, mop, bleach, and brush for scrubbing. First, clean the blood up with hot water from the sink. Next, scrub everything down with bleach as a precaution. 

Last step is cleaning Damen up. He rinses the blood off of his arms and chest the best he can. He always keeps a change of clothes in his car for this reason. Out behind the cabin is a pit where he tosses the blood-soaked clothes to burn. It still feels bad to burn a shirt like that when he wore it just for Laurent today. But it’s evidence now and Damen can’t keep any of that around. A double check of the cabin is made before Damen can leave.

The drive back home with Auguste is long. He has to stop for gas once and make conversation with a lady outside. She’s polite and complements Damen on his looks, even giving him the opportunity to boast about Laurent. She sees this as a normal conversation, Damen thinks this feels like an itch he can’t scratch not opening his trunk and dropping Auguste at her feet. When it gets too overwhelming to even speak anymore Damen politely excuses himself and starts driving again. He already has the perfect dropping place for Auguste’s body. Early in the morning, Auguste and Jord patrol a park a short ways away from Laurent’s place. It frequents a lot of drug deals, which Damen knows about because he’s orchestrated many of them. He’s been friends with some of the people that have been arrested here. Damen has only actually been to the park a few time, each was to watch where Jord and Auguste usually go so he would know where to put Laurent’s body when the time came. It's already early morning so Jord should be there within the next hour. Damen drops the body in a more secluded area of the park and heads out. He is now running on over forty-eight hours of no sleep. He wants to go back to his apartment, clean up, and sleep before he has to deal with Laurent when he finds out what happened to his brother.


	18. Chapter 18

Things went exactly as Damen planned them to. An hour after he dumped Auguste’s body, Jord came through on patrol. Jord had almost skipped out on it that day too. When Auguste didn’t show up to work that night he was a little worried and didn’t want to go without him. The park is usually one of the last places they go before the end of their shift. But instead he did what he knew he needed to do and he went without Auguste. The place Auguste was left was the first Jord went to so he never got around to the rest of the park. The moment he realized the body he found was Auguste, he dropped to the ground screaming in horror. He’s seen dead bodies mutilated beyond recognition before but seeing someone he knows murdered was like a horror movie. 

“Jord? Hey, I asked you a question. We’re going to need to call his brother in. Do you want to do it or shall I?” Someone questions.

“No. No, don’t call him. Let me take care of this for him and then I’ll go tell him myself.” Jord mumbles. 

People talk to Jord and ask him questions but he doesn’t remember what he does or how he answers. The whole world seems to be muffled out but he fills out the paperwork they tell him to. Next thing Jord remembers is standing at the front of the police station not knowing what he’s supposed to do. He was told to take a few days off but he still can’t bring himself to leave. Auguste was supposed to pick up coffee last night. He had lost a bet and owed Jord a coffee, he had promised to pick it up on the way. That’s why Jord was so irritated all night because he was tired and hadn’t bothered to pick up coffee that day. 

Now Jord has to go tell Laurent that his only family member left is dead. He was told someone else could do it but after knowing the two of them for so many years Jord felt responsible. It’s his job to watch over Laurent now no matter how hard it is for him. He has to be strong for Laurent. On the way to Laurent’s office he makes a detour to his apartment. When he walks inside Aimeric comes wandering out of the kitchen with a cup of tea. As soon as he sees Jord walk in he puts the mug down and hurries up to meet him at the door. 

“Hey, what’s wrong? You don’t look too good.” Aimeric pulls Jord down into a hug when he walks into the apartment. He’s probably just getting out of bed now, normally Aimeric would come over after Jord’s shift and stay with him for a few hours but last night he was so tired and looked so peaceful Jord left him to sleep. 

“Auguste is dead.” Jord says quietly. Aimeric gasps but Jord sobs harder into his shoulder. “He was murdered just how all those people he talked about were. That asshole had to have been seeing someone and he didn’t even tell me.”

“Slow down, look at me.” Aimeric pulls back and has to hold Jord’s face in his hands. “Talk to me, tell me what happened.”

“I was at the park and I thought I saw something in this area where we find a lot of deals happening and I saw him,” Jord shakes his head and another tear falls. “His body was all cut up.”

“Come here, come sit down with me.” Aimeric tries to pull Jord to go sit but he shakes his head and takes a step back towards the door. 

“I can’t, Laurent doesn’t know yet. I have to go tell him.” Aimeric sighs and nods, letting his hands fall from Jord’s face. “I just needed to see you.”

“I’m so sorry.” He pulls down Jord face into a kiss, it tastes salty from Jord’s tears. Aimeric doesn’t know what this means, he was told to get information out of Jord about Auguste but if he’s dead then there’s no job to do. “Go do what you need to do and then come back here, I’ll wait for you.”

Jord makes his way out slowly, the drive to Laurent’s office is all a blur. When he gets to the office he sits outside for a long while. Laurent is going to cry and Jord isn’t ready for that. 

“Hi, I’m looking for Laurent. Can you show me where he is?” Jord asks the first person he sees once he makes it inside. A loud crash brings Jord’s attention to a desk not far from where he stands. Laurent had been checking something over at Ancel’s desks when Jord walked in. The mug in his hand full of the Akielon coffee Damen got for him now lay shattered on the floor. The tears visible in Jord’s eyes tells Laurent everything he needs to know. ”Laurent, can we talk somewhere private?”

“No, not here. You’re not doing this to me today.”

“Laurent please, can we go somewhere private?” Laurent leads him into is office and Jord hovers by the door for a minute. Laurent isn’t an idiot, there’s only one reason Jord would visit him at work, he knows that but he’s holding onto any hope that he might be wrong. Eventually Jord takes a deep breath and sits down.

“What happened?” Laurent asks.

“I’m so sorry Laurent.” 

“What are you sorry for?” Laurent knows, Jord knows that he does, but all he can do is hope that he’s wrong. 

“Your brother he’s… Auguste is dead. He must have been seeing someone we didn’t know about, it was the fucking murderer that did it.” Jord quickly wipes his eyes and tries his best to look fine for Laurent. Laurent’s eyes stay fixed on the ground in front of him, refusing to cry but also not knowing what to do with himself. “There’s been a lot of people dying around here lately similar to how that guy kills but it wasn’t that. It was definitely him, all of his signatures, it was all there. Your brother got himself into some deep trouble and none of us even knew it.” 

“My brother would never.” Laurent finally mutters. “I can’t even leave the house without him lecturing me. My brother would never see someone like that and not know it.”

“That’s how this guy kills. Auguste has to have known him.” Jord is right. The running theory Auguste has told Laurent about countless times is that the murderer was close with or dated whoever he killed. If Auguste died like this, he had to have known it was coming. 

“Who found his body?” Laurent mumbles. His hands now grip the front of his desk like it’s the only thing keeping him grounded.

“I did.” 

“Was it as bad?”

“I’m so sorry for your loss Laurent.” He says, avoiding the question.

“I want to see him.” Laurent finally says. They are both silent for a while until Laurent looks up and sees Jord shake his head. “I want to see what happened to him.”

“I don’t think that’s-“

“I want to see him!” Laurent shouts, not being able to control his emotions. He finally nods so they walk out of Laurent’s office together. Everyone heard Laurent scream at Jord so everyone stands to watch as they walk out together. Normally Laurent would yell at them for this but he can barely bring himself to speak. 

Laurent wouldn't ask for this unless he knew he really needed it. He’s seen dead bodies before and they don’t always look the same in death as they did when they were alive. This could be completely traumatizing for Laurent but he can’t think straight enough to realize that right now. When they get there a few minutes later, Jord walks around to open the door for Laurent but he can’t bring himself to get out. 

“You don’t have to do this Laurent. I already identified him, if you don’t want to see him you don’t have to. I know how much you loved your brother, you don’t have to do this.” With those words Laurent gets out of the car and marches past Jord into the building. He’s lost the ability to form coherent sentences without feeling like he might throw up so Jord takes care of the paperwork needed before they go in. “Hey, this is your last chance to back out. I don’t want this to be the last thing you remember about your brother. It’s worse than you think.”

“Let me see him,” Laurent says, standing up from a chair. Jord hands over a tissue and it takes Laurent a minute to realize that he’s certain Laurent will cry at some point. The fear of this all becoming real brings the emotions threatening to bubble out. They walk Laurent into a room and Jord leaves with the man that brought him in there, Jord can’t do this again so Laurent is not upset with him at all. Laurent wants to do this on his own anyway. It’s a small room with a glass window into the room next to it. The light is dim enough he can’t see much but the vague silhouette of a table. 

A minute later the lights turn on and a sheet is pulled back on the table to reveal a body and Laurent feels like he might faint. He wasn’t prepared for the nausea that this would bring to him. There’s a deep cut all the way across Auguste’s neck exposing almost an inch of flesh. Down his chest and abdomen, there are more, not as deep but just as horrific. They start at his shoulders and go down all the way past where the sheet is pulled down to. His face is gray in color and his cheeks sunken in so he doesn’t even look like himself anymore. Laurent takes a few steps backward in shock and must let out some noise in horror because suddenly Jord is in the room to pull him out. 

“I’m so sorry Laurent,” Jord says between his own tears. He makes Laurent sit down outside of the room and breathe. Tears roll down his face faster than he can dry them and they won’t stop. He takes a few minutes trying to calm down, ignoring what the people around him are saying, but he can’t get himself to stop crying. This all feels like some sick dream. Jord sets a hand on Laurent’s shoulder trying to comfort him but he just shrugs it away. 

“This is your fault,” Laurent says through clenched teeth. “He was your partner, it should be you dead not him.”

“Laurent-”

“Where is his necklace?” It finally hits Laurent in a wave of panic that Auguste was not wearing his necklace. He wears it everywhere, a silver starburst that Laurent never understood. But Auguste loved it and never took it off so why isn’t he wearing it now. It sends panic through him at the thought that the murderer would have kept it. “Auguste didn’t have his necklace on where did they put it?”

“I was going to talk to you about that,” Jord shakes off Laurent’s words knowing that it’s just the grief talking. He opens his hand and passes over the necklace to Laurent. “They took it off of him, I assumed you’d want it.” 

“Take me home,” Laurent says, clutching onto the necklace so hard his knuckles turn white. He holds the necklace to his chest and finally stops trying to fight the tears. “I want to be alone, take me home.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea right now,” Jord says. He’s worried about Laurent trying to grieve on his own, which he is right to do, but Laurent won’t take no for an answer. 

“I don’t fucking care what you think, take me home.” Laurent spits back. Eventually, Jord nods and walks him back out to the car. 

“You call me if you need anything okay? Whenever you feel up to going to pick up your car I’ll take you.” Jord says when they pull up outside of Laurent’s apartment a few minutes later. “I’ll take care of the funeral arrangements.”

“Leave me the fuck alone,” Laurent mumbles on his way out. Walking inside feels different already. Knowing that his brother will never walk through those doors again makes this place feels disgusting. He closes the front door and realizes how tight he is still squeezing the necklace. He lets his fingers open and the necklace dangles down from the tip of his finger. It was recently cleaned, either the murderer cleaning off evidence and blood or the coroner when they took it off of Auguste, maybe both but Laurent has no way of knowing. He carries it with him down to Auguste’s room. Laurent hasn’t been in his room in a long time. There’s usually no reason to come in here, Laurent almost feels like he’s invading on a place he should not be. He tosses the necklace on Auguste’s bed and sits down on the floor at the end of it. Laying on the bed feels wrong, touching any of Auguste’s stuff feels wrong. 

Auguste’s obsession with finding the killer went further than it should have. On his wall, Auguste has a map of Akielos and Vere tracking where the killings have taken place. Beside each of the locations, he has newspaper articles or facts he has found pinned on the wall. This obsession went far enough to get him killed. Laurent should have been at work now but that definitely isn’t happening. He crawls up into Auguste’s bed and curls up on top of the blankets. Auguste is the one that raised Laurent, they have been there for each other through everything. He wasn’t supposed to die. Laurent hears the front door open and close but he doesn’t get up to see who it is. He doesn’t care anymore if someone is there to rob him then so be it, if it’s Damen or Jord he will just kick them out. 

“Laurent? Where are you?” Laurent hears Damen asks. He sighs to himself and stays quiet. Damen walks in after a minute and frowns. “I heard what happened, I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t want to talk to you right now, get out.” Damen ignores him and walks in Auguste’s room, sitting down on the edge of the bed. A person’s bedroom is a private place and unless they invite someone in, it feels like an invasion of privacy. Laurent sits up and pushes Damen with his foot until he stands up. “Get out of his room now.”

“Come here, come talk to me out here then,” Damen says, respectfully taking a few steps closer to the door. 

“I told you to get out, I don’t want you here.” Laurent charges towards him and shoves him hard until he backs out of Auguste’s room and into the hallway. “Get out of my apartment!”

“You’re angry, I understand. But I didn’t do it, you need to calm down. I’m just here to make sure you’re okay.” Laurent storms out of the room and away from him. But Damen follows along behind him so Laurent stops and shoves him away. His hands push hard and probably hurt when they hit Damen’s chest but Damen stays very calm and lets Laurent calm himself down. This goes on for a minute before Laurent reaches up and slaps Damen across the face. Laurent pulls his hand away and Damen catches his wrist on the way and pulls him so Laurent’s back is pressed against his chest and he can’t move anymore. Laurent’s arms are crossed tightly over his chest so he can’t even wiggle out of Damen’s grip. “I told you to calm down. Hitting me isn’t going to solve any problems so stop it.”

“Get your hands off of me!” Laurent stops trying to fight and just stands there in Damen’s arms. Damen slowly walks the two of them down to Laurent’s bedroom and finally lets go of him when the door is closed. 

“Lay down,” Damen says softly. After some fussing Laurent eventually listens and sits down on the bed. When Damen sits down next to him it takes a few minutes before Laurent will even look at Damen. “Are you okay?”

“My brother was just murdered and you want to know if I’m okay?” Laurent spits back with something resembling a laugh. Damen has no idea what he’s supposed to do when Laurent just stares off at the floor. Crying he could do, holding someone and letting them sob themselves into exhaustion is far easier than sitting with someone who refuses to be touched or talked to. Whenever Damen reaches over to comfort him, Laurent pulls out of his touch. 

“What can I do to help?”

“Leave me the fuck alone,” Laurent says quietly. “I don’t want you.”

“You’ll be okay. I know it’s hard, but you’ll get through this.” 

“You think I’ll be okay? They let me see his body. I’m going to see that in my nightmares for the rest of my life.”

“Wait, what?” Damen jerks his head back up to look at Laurent’s face in shock. He didn’t plan for Laurent to have to see what he had done to his brother. There was a reason he left the body where he did. Jord would find him and Laurent would never have to see him without what Damen had done covered. 

“Jord warned me I didn’t want to see him, but I needed to. I don’t understand how anyone could do that.” 

“You shouldn’t have seen him.” He say, sounding like it even scares him. “You should not have looked at him like that. I’ve heard what that guy does to people.”

“Did you kill him?” Laurent asks. “You’re the last one to see him alive.”

“I told you, I went down to talk to him and he was already gone.”

“It makes sense though, you didn’t want to meet Auguste. You were adamant about never meeting him. But then the fucking day that you meet him he’s murdered, that’s a little strange don’t you think? I bet you killed him so he wouldn’t get in your way anymore.” Laurent is too smart for his own good. He is saying these things to be hurtful to Damen but he’s right about everything. 

“You’re jumping to conclusions now. You know me, I would never hurt your brother.”

“I don’t know you, I don’t know anything about you.”

“Hurting your brother means hurting you, and I don’t want to hurt you.” Laurent just stares, his jaw clenching and unclenching in frustration. Every part of Damen’s plan had gone right so far, except for Laurent, he wasn’t supposed to be this angry. Damen tried again to comfort him with a soft touch but Laurent’s stare doesn’t change. 

“I want you out.” Laurent rips his arm out of Damen’s grip and storms off into the bathroom. When Damen hears the crash he hurries in after him only to find the flowers he got for Laurent laying in his trash with a broken cup. 

“You didn’t need to do that.” Damen sighs. 

“If you don’t get out of my apartment in the next minute I’m calling Jord and telling him everything I know about you,” Laurent says. “Every person I’ve met, every conversation I’ve overheard, all of it until you’re in prison for the rest of your fucking life.”

The stand silently for a second before Damen nods and walks out. Sitting here continuing to bother Laurent all night isn’t going to help at all. He’d rather stay away and let Laurent calm himself down than risk someone getting hurt in the frustration.


	19. Chapter 19

Denial, the first stage of grief. Laurent experienced this the moment Jord walked into his work that day. There was no way Auguste could be dead when he was alive and talking last night. Seeing his broken and mutilated body threw him hard into shock. He felt completely numb to the thought of it. It made no sense to him what happened and no matter how many times he told himself it was true he couldn’t feel it. 

The second stage is anger, as soon as Damen showed up at his apartment he was consumed by white-hot rage. But without knowing who did this to him there was no place to direct this anger, so he took it out on everyone around him. He had already lashed out on Jord right after seeing Auguste’s body. But when Damen showed up the anger spilled out at everything around him. He kicked Damen out but he was still furious. Why Auguste? Why did this have to happen to him? This anger consumed Laurent so much he turned his phone off to avoid all the pity calls from Jord and Damen. The two of them just wanted to make sure Laurent was okay but that just made him more angry. Jord should have protected Auguste better, they were partners for god sake. Damen should have gone downstairs sooner and stopped whoever it was that took Auguste.

This lead him into the third stage, bargaining. If Laurent could go back in time and die instead of his brother he would do it in a heartbeat. But it was guilt, bargaining’s co-host, that consumed Laurent more. What if Damen hadn’t come over that night? What if Laurent asked him to stay home that night so they could all talk more? What if Laurent had walked outside with Auguste like he had wanted to do? So many reasons to blame himself for the senseless death of his brother. None of them logical of course, because grief does not care about logic. 

It took Laurent three days to start bargaining, but when Damen showed up at his place it set him back into blind anger. There was a knock at the door that Laurent ignored for a long time. It was ten minutes of this person pounding on the door before there was a moment of messing with the lock and in walked Damen. Laurent lay out of the couch wrapped in one of Auguste’s old blankets. Damen looked at Laurent with pity in his eyes, seeing Laurent hurt like this was difficult for Damen to see. 

“You haven’t been answering your phone,” Damen says, leaning against the wall as he walks in. That was one thing Damen had caught on to, Laurent did not want anyone close to him. “I was getting worried about you.”

“I had that locked for a reason asshole.” Laurent spits, not giving Damen the satisfaction of making eye contact with him. 

“If you’re not going to answer your phone or the door then I’m going to break in.” Damen slides down the wall to sit on the floor. “Why don’t you come to stay at my place for a while? Then I won’t have to worry about you so much.”

“I’m not stepping foot in that shitty motel room ever again.”

“I meant my apartment, this is time for you to grieve. I promise not to bother you too much, I’ll cook for you and make sure you don’t have to worry about anything.” Laurent glances over at Damen for a second but goes right back to staring at the ceiling. “I don’t want to watch you do this to yourself.”

“My brother is dead, I’m going to do this for as long as I want.”

“I know I just-” He’s cut off by the sound of someone else knocking at the door. 

“If you want to do anything for me, tell him to go away.” Damen stays seated long enough for Laurent to decide that he’s not going to do it. He sighs and rolls over to face the back of the couch. “Of course, still too afraid to meet anyone. If you’re not going to answer it just be quiet and let’s hope he leaves.”

What Laurent doesn’t realize is that as he talks, Damen got up from the floor and walked over to the front door. He gives himself a moment to calm down before making any decisions. This is all Laurent has asked for, Damen can do this. What does it matter if someone else sees Damen now if he doesn’t intend on killing Laurent anymore? Right now, Laurent is so devastated by Auguste’s death the thought of making Laurent feel any more of that physically hurts Damen. 

“Oh? Um… I’m here to see Laurent, where is he?” Laurent’s head glances back to see Damen at the door with Jord. Jord makes eye contact with Laurent who just turns back around to face the back of the couch again. 

“He told me he doesn’t want to talk to anyone.”

“Who are you?” Jord questions. 

“Damen, I’m his boyfriend,” Laurent scoffs just loud enough that Damen hears. To Laurent, they aren’t anything anymore, he said he doesn’t want to see anyone and yet Damen breaks into his home anyways. 

“I have the information for the funeral, do you mind if I come in?” Damen can sense the tension growing behind him as Laurent silently begs him to say no, to tell him Laurent doesn’t want to see him anymore. But Damen just steps aside and lets him in. 

“He’s in a bad mood, be careful,” Damen says quietly to Jord so Laurent can’t hear. 

“Hey, Laurent. I have the information for Auguste’s funeral, I’ll leave it with Damen for you. The police department took care of everything.” Jord sits down in the chair closest to Laurent. “Do you need anything at all?”

“For you to leave me alone.” Jord reaches out to touch Laurent’s shoulder but Laurent pulls away and quickly turns around to face him. “You know what? Don’t sit here and try and comfort me when I bet your glad my brother is dead. He was always a better cop than you. You are nothing compared to him, you couldn’t even save your partner from getting killed. How many times did he save your ass? He deserved a better partner.”

“Now that’s not fair, you know it’s not his fault.” Damen cuts in. But Jord has already pulled away and silently made his way across the room. 

“What’s it to you? You’re a fucking worthless junkie, I asked you for one thing and you couldn’t even do that you let him in as soon as you opened the door.” 

“I’m clean, you don’t need to drag that into this. He just wanted to check on you.” Damen’s frustration is starting to get too hard to control so he sits down against the wall again and squeezes his fist tight in his lap. Laurent, of course, has already caught on to what this means and does his best to make it worse. 

“What are you going to do hit me? Here, let me help you.” Laurent gets up and walks right up to kneel in front of Damen. He wants to make Damen lash out in front of Jord, if that happens then Jord will kick him out and Laurent won’t have to deal with him anymore. “There, now you can reach me.”

“You can hurt me all you want, it’s not going to bring your brother back.” Laurent’s face contorts from anger to something close to sadness. He stands up and runs off into his room, slamming the door shut behind him. 

“He’s just grieving, he’s been like this for as long as I’ve known him. He won’t ask for help and he won’t show you what he’s feeling.” Jord says, sitting back down in the chair. Damen runs his hands through his hair and leaves them there, sighing and staring down at the floor. This is all too much for him, dealing with Laurent is already enough. Talking to Jord makes things so much worse. 

“Yeah, I know. How long have you known him?”

“He was fifteen when I met him so, eight years?” Jord pauses for a moment but when Damen doesn’t speak, he continues. “How long have you two been together?”

“Two months.”

“He doesn’t talk about you.”

“That’s because I told him not to.” Damen looks back up at Jord but his stare is too much and Damen lets his eyes wander around the room. “I don’t like meeting family until a relationship is serious. People like to add their opinions to relationships even when they are unwanted.”

“Auguste was very protective of him, he would have questioned you a lot.”

“Yeah I know, we met once. The night he disappeared he walked in on Laurent and I. He had quite a lot to say.” Jord smiles and looks down at his feet, his cheeks turning pink. Jord thinks Damen means he walked in on them fucking, Damen knows this but he doesn’t feel like correcting that. 

“He raised Laurent most of his life, he was overprotective sometimes but for good reason.” Jord smiles to himself at old memories but he doesn’t feel ready for the nostalgia so that smile quickly fades into a frown. “Auguste told me a long time ago that if anything ever happened to him, he wanted me to make sure Laurent was okay. I want to do that, but he won’t talk to me.”

“He won’t talk to me either.” 

“He talked to you more than he talked to me.” 

“Yeah, to call me a junkie and tell me to hurt him. I wouldn’t call that speaking to me really.” Jord stays silent and stares at Damen with a half smile. “I’m not a junkie.”

“I never said you were,” Jord says back. The way he stares at Damen says he doesn’t believe that at all. 

“I know that look, I’ve been clean for a long time. Laurent just likes to bring it up when we fight because he thinks he can get me to slip up.” Damen lies. It hasn’t been all that long since the last time he got high but Jord shouldn’t know that. “I’m going to bring him to my place for a while and see if I can do anything to help.”

“Well, good luck with that. I hope you can.” Jord smiles and heads out so Damen can get on with what he came here for originally. 

“Hey, open up we need to talk.” Damen knocks softly on the bedroom door but barges in when Laurent doesn’t respond. He now lay on his bed facing his window, wrapped in the same blanket. “Come stay with me.”

“No,” Laurent says. Damen isn’t taking no as an answer though. He finds a bag of Laurent’s and tosses it to him. “I said no.”

“Look, we can do this the easy way or we can do this the hard way. Either way, you’re coming with me.” Laurent sits up and looks at Damen in disgust. “So, get some stuff together, and let’s go.” 

“I don’t want this. You can’t just leave me alone? You should be used to that, you’re the one that loves ignoring me.” Laurent spits. But Damen points at the bag and Laurent gets up to get his stuff together. He’s furious with Damen who really just wants to help. When he has everything ready to go he hesitantly tosses the bag down on the bed. 

“You should pack what you need for the funeral.” It’s not something Damen wanted to bring up right now but it needs to be said. Damen doesn’t want to drive back here to get anything until Laurent is going home. Laurent looks at Damen with wide eyes and clenched teeth. Damen expects protest, he expects some angry remark about not wanting to do that, but Laurent silently pulls a suit out from his closet and lays it out on the bed. It’s too nice to be folded so it will have to be brought as it is now. “You’ll look very nice.” 

“Let’s go.” Laurent says quietly. Damen gather’s all of Laurent’s things for him when Laurent just takes the blanket he’s been using all afternoon. The car ride is silent because every time Damen tries to say something Laurent turns his entire body to look out the window until Damen stops talking. At Damen’s apartment he tries to tell Laurent he can go lay in bed but he ignores him and goes to sit in a large armchair with a footrest by the windows. That’s the place Damen likes to sit in read on days back here so it’s the perfect place for Laurent to sit and watch the street below them. 

“Do you need anything?” Damen asks. Laurent just shakes his head and pulls the blanket up around himself. It’s Damen who notices this change, from angry and aggressive to silent and withdrawn. Stage four, depression. It’s this stage that Laurent would end up spending the most time in. He fell out of denial the moment he saw Auguste’s body and he had no deity to bargain with over it. It was the realization he would never see his brother again and the hopelessness that overwhelmed. More than once he opened the large window next to the chair and Damen would have to close it so he didn’t freeze to death when he fell asleep. Damen has a perfectly nice bed that Laurent had admit before, is very comfortable. But he didn’t want to sleep near Damen and he had convinced himself Damen would try and sneak in after he had gone to sleep even if he knew that wasn’t true. But instead Laurent just slept in the chair, only standing up when he needed something. Damen didn’t want to leave him alone out in the chair and he felt bad sleeping in a bed when Laurent was out here so he slept on the couch every night. 

They went through this same routine every day. Damen would try and make conversation but would quickly be shut down and they’d spend the rest of the day in silence. He’d cook meals for the two of them and had to force Laurent to sit up long enough to eat something before he was allowed to fall back to sleep. 

“Laurent come on sit up and go take a shower, I’ll make you something to eat.” Damen says kneeling down next to Laurent. Laurent glances over and shakes his head. The grease in his hair shines in the sunlight from days of not being washed. When Damen tries to make Laurent look at him he turns and buries his face in his blanket. “A shower will make you feel a little better.”

“No it won’t,” Laurent says, climbing out of the chair and heading off to shower anyway. The shower is warm and relaxing to his muscles but it doesn’t help with much else. He still desperately misses his brother, he still hates himself for not spending enough time with Auguste in the last few months, and he still hates Damen for trying so hard to make him feel better. When he comes out of the bathroom a while later, feeling slightly refreshed in new clothes and the grease washed from his face and hair, he is made sit down at the table to eat something. Damen cooked him a light meal since every time he cooks Laurent claims his stomach hurts. Laurent does his best to force down as much as he can before he feels like anymore and it will all come right back up.

“Are you feeling any better?”

“I need to lay down,” Laurent mutters as he makes his way back to lay in the chair.

Anytime Laurent goes to sleep Damen lays out on the couch, no matter if he was tired or not, and stay silent in the dark so Laurent can sleep peacefully. This was a fine routine until the night before the funeral and Damen could tell how exhausted Laurent was. 

“Come on, get up and go to bed.” Laurent glances up for a second but pulls his blanket up and stays silent. “You’re going to have a tough day tomorrow, at least go get a good night's sleep tonight please.”

“I’ll sleep in there if you promise me I get to go home and stay there without you after the funeral.”

“But-”

“Then no, I’m not moving. Turn the light off when you’re done.” Laurent lays his head on the armrest and closes his eyes. 

“Fine, you can go home.” Damen gives in. Laurent sits up and nods, waiting for the conditions for a second, but makes his way to bed when he realizes there are none. Damen would rather Laurent gets a good night sleep tonight rather than being much grumpier tomorrow at probably one of the worst days of his life.


	20. Chapter 20

“Fuck.” Laurent mutters under his breath. Damen is just getting out of the shower when he finds Laurent struggling to untie his crooked tie. 

“Let me help you.” Damen walks up and moves Laurent’s hands away so he can finish tying his tie. Laurent is so overwhelmed with emotion he’s had to retie it three times already. “You just have to get through today, and then you don’t have to see anyone.”

“I know how a fucking funeral works.” Laurent spits back. He’s been very harsh and mean with everything he says to Damen lately. He hates that Damen made him stay at his place instead of at home, even though he knows this is for the best. He hates how kind and caring he’s been just because Laurent is going through a tough time. But mainly he just hates that this kindness is only here because his brother died. But Damen seems to understand all of this so he never gets defensive when Laurent yells. “I don’t want to see Jord, I can’t even look at him anymore.”

“Why not? He’s been very nice to you from what I’ve seen.”

“He’s the one that told me Auguste is dead. How am I supposed to look at him and not hate him?”

“It’s just for today.” Damen finishes tying Laurent’s tie but places his hands on his shoulders. “You can pretend for one day.” 

“Easy for you to say, you didn’t know him and you’re not even coming.”

“Who says I’m not coming?” Damen asks. Laurent finally looks up at Damen and makes eye contact with him for the first time in days. “You’re going through a lot, I want to be there for you. I’ll drop you off with Jord and I’ll come back later, I don’t want to get in the way of anything but I want to be there to support you.”

“You think that makes you courageous? That makes you a decent human being.” Laurent spits, pulling out of Damen’s grip and leaving the bedroom. Damen gets dressed in his best suit that is most appropriate for a funeral. The last time Damen had to go to a funeral was after he killed his brother, but he was so pissed off he barely even showed up. This funeral is so much different for so many reasons. Damen is the one that killed Auguste so going to his funeral is risky since this will most likely bring him back to the night of the murder all over again. However, the most important thing on Damen’s mind now is helping Laurent through such a horrible time. 

Damen makes his way out of the bedroom once he’s dressed and finds all of Laurent’s things packed and piled by the door. Laurent glances Damen over like he wants to make a comment on what he’s wearing but he doesn’t say anything.

“So you’re really going home then?” Damen asks Laurent who stands huddled near the kitchen sink drinking a cup of coffee. Laurent had been at Damen’s house for three days now and he’s refused coffee everyday. The idea of Akielos coffee made his entire body retch when it brings back the memories from when Jord told him his brother had died. But today he couldn’t help himself with the exhaustion feeling like too much to deal with on a day like today. After every sip he has to take a deep breath to keep the coffee from coming back up. 

“That’s what you promised me, I sleep in your bed if I get to go home.” The irony being Laurent never slept. He laid in Damen’s bed all night and didn’t sleep at all. “I don’t want to stay here anymore.”

“I was hoping you’d change your mind. I like being able to take care of you.” Laurent lets out a noise somewhat resembling a laugh. He takes another sip of coffee and can’t get himself to drink anymore.

“I haven’t, obviously.” Damen takes all of Laurent’s things out to the car. They head out with no more angry comments from Laurent. The entire car ride Laurent spends twirling Auguste’s necklace around in his hand. When they get to the address Jord gave to Damen, Jord stands out front waiting for Laurent. “I swear to god this fucking asshole never stops.”

“I’ll be back later, okay?” Damen says. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Laurent asks. “You think you’re going to skip out on this part? You’re not, park the fucking car you’re coming inside.”

“If that’s what you want.” Damen says. Laurent waits in the car with Damen so he can make sure he doesn’t try to just leave. If Damen is coming to this funeral he needs to go the whole time, not just a few minutes. Damen hurries around the car to get the door for Laurent but is shoved out of the way when he gets too close to Laurent. Jord gives Damen an uncomfortable but sympathetic smile when he notices how hard Damen is working to accommodate Laurent. The three of them walk inside together, with Damen and Jord hanging back a few steps to stay out of the way, and Laurent stops dead in his tracks when he sees the casket. Damen and Jord hang back without a word so Laurent can have a small amount of privacy. 

“I want to see him again,” Laurent says. 

“No,” Damen lets slip out. Both Laurent and Jord turn to face him, Jord understands why Damen said no but he doesn’t understand why he was so defensive with the way he said it. “You are not going to do that to yourself.”

“I’ll do what I think is best for myself, not you.” Damen doesn’t have it in himself to stay calm today. So when Jord and Laurent walk up to look at the body, Damen hangs back. Laurent prepared himself for the worst but the body has been prepared for viewing, even though the casket will be closed for the service, so all of the cuts are covered. Auguste wears a high neck shirt that just barely covers the edge of the cut across his neck that is now stitched closed. Laurent’s eyes flicker over his body for a moment before Damen walks up and guides him away to sit down. They sit on one of the first benches and Laurent’s eyes stay fixed on the ground. 

“Are you okay?” Damen asks. Jord stands far enough away that he isn’t involved in the conversation but he listens in. When Laurent doesn’t answer right away Damen looks up at Jord and shakes his head. “Laurent, hey look at me. Other people are coming soon, are you sure you’re okay?”

“You know what? I was wrong, fuck off for a while.” Laurent says through grit teeth. When neither of them moves, Laurent glances up. “Both of you, get out.”

“If that’s what you want.” Jord and Damen leave him and head outside for a while. Out of all the times that Damen has killed someone, he has never had the opportunity to go to a funeral. It’s overwhelming and bringing back all the memories from killing Auguste. Damen wants to stay in silence but Jord is up for talking today.

“I thought it would help,” Jord says. 

“Yeah well, it didn’t. I tried to tell him but he doesn’t ever listen to me.” 

“He wouldn’t have listened to anyone but Auguste.” Jord’s right, the way Auguste got Laurent to stay quiet when he wanted to talk to Damen without interruption. Auguste would have just had to say one word and Laurent would have done whatever he said. 

Damen stays outside for a long time. Jord went back inside when the first people showed up so he could prepare Laurent but Damen couldn’t bring himself to go in. He waits until plenty more people are there for a distraction before he goes back in. 

Hundreds of grieving people show up and it’s easy enough for Damen to slip within the crowd without anyone noticing. A police officer murdered investigating something the city’s detectives refused to look into made more than just people Auguste knew come out to show their condolences. All of Auguste’s friends stand silent not knowing what to do with themselves. A few of them shed some tears but others just stand with blank expressions. Jord stands with Aimeric hanging off of his side trying to comfort him. Auguste had a way of bringing everyone together despite the situation, this was the hardest possible death for any of them to deal with. Damen never realized how many people cared about Auguste. 

All of these men mourn for his death and think about how he was murdered so brutally, but none of them know how much he truly suffered. The screams that came from his mouth, the pleading for death. Damen looks at the picture at the front of the room but all he can see is the blood-soaked man sobbing for him to stop.

Damen finds Laurent sitting at the front of the room closest to the casket. The only striking thing noticeable is that he now wears Auguste’s necklace around his neck. The same one that was soaked in blood just a few days ago. Laurent looks up at Damen with a blank stare. His face is damp from dried tears but he shows no other signs of crying now. Next to him sits a man with dark hair and a beard whispering quietly to Laurent. It seems very strange to Damen that Laurent allows this man to touch his shoulders when he wouldn’t let anyone else do so. Damen doesn’t want to interrupt if they are discussing something private but Laurent tells Damen with just a glance of his eyes that he is needed to get this man away from him. 

“Hey, sorry to interrupt. I need to speak to Laurent for a moment.” The man looks up at Damen and he is struck by how similar his eye color is to Laurent’s. “I don’t think we’ve met before. My name is Damen, I’m Laurent’s boyfriend, who are you to him might I ask?”

“I’m his uncle.” Damen is suddenly struck with blind anger. Before he can even think about what he is doing he has a hold of the front of his shirt and hits him hard enough for blood to well up under his nose. Some people gasp but Damen gets three hits in before Jord is there pulling Damen off of him. He can’t see or hear Jord, he just feels consumed by anger and the motivation to get back to what he’s doing. 

“Damen! Stop it, this is Auguste’s funeral.” Jord says, shoving Damen into the other room. Now that Auguste is gone, Damen is the only one left that knows what happened to Laurent. Jord doesn’t know, Laurent would never want him to know, but Damen might have to tell him to get out of this. 

“You better get him out of here I swear to god I’ll kill him,” Damen says, attempting to keep his voice down. “He’s not welcome here, Auguste wouldn’t want him.” 

“How would you know anything about what Auguste wants?”

“Because I know this guy and the shit he’s done. Laurent will tell you he’s not welcome, so do your fucking job and get him out of here.” Damen spits back. Jord grits his teeth and walks back out into the other room to find Laurent, who hasn’t moved an inch. Cautiously Jord sits down next to him to talk. 

“Do you want him to leave?”

“My uncle is not welcome into our lives. Let him pay his respects if he likes, but get him out of here or let Damen finish what he started.” Jord nods and his request is put into motion. His uncle is brought back into the room, cleaned of the blood, and allowed to walk up to Auguste’s casket. Damen is still very hesitant of him going anywhere near Laurent so he stands in between them the entire time. 

“You were such a sweet boy Laurent, I wished you find it in yourself to get over everything that happened without resorting to this violence.” 

“If I find out you ever bothered him again I’ll kill you,” Damen mutters before Jord has to step in again and lead Laurent’s uncle out of the building. As soon as he’s out of the building Damen moves back over to sit with Laurent. “Are you okay?”

“Now that he’s gone yes.” The tension in Laurent’s back is visible but he is able to talk to Damen without much anger. “I don’t have the strength to do that myself, but you saw me upset and took care of everything. Auguste would be glad you hit him.”

“My only job is to protect you,” Damen says. Suddenly Aimeric decides to approach them and Damen doesn’t have enough time to push him away. 

“I’m sorry for your loss Laurent.” Laurent’s head flies up to look at him. “If you need anything, Jord and I-”

“‘Jord and I’? It was my understanding that you’ve been using him for the past few months, so what exactly do you mean by ‘Jord and I’?” Laurent spits. “It probably wasn’t hard getting in his bed. A pretty young boy like yourself could easily fuck your way to getting whatever you want.”

“It’s not like that, I love him.”

“You love him? You whored yourself out for information on my brother and now look at him. He’s fucking dead and here you are still acting like an innocent little slut and all for what?” Aimeric now stands crying, softly enough it's not obvious to anyone else. “You know when Jord finds out he’ll hate you. He’s going to be disgusted with you. You were probably a good fuck but not good enough to forgive you for that.”

“Stop,” Aimeric says loud enough to draw the attention of a few people. “Please Laurent, I’m sorry. Please don’t be upset with me.”

“Why should I make you feel better right now? My brother died and you are the one who used his best friend for information.” Jord finally caught on to what was happening makes his way into the conversation. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” Jord asks. Aimeric quickly pulls himself into Jord’s arms and sobs. Laurent had destroyed him for just trying to be polite, this needed to stop. Damen didn’t care for Aimeric anyways, but Laurent was going to say something wrong and exposed Damen to everyone. “What is wrong with you? He was just trying to be nice to you.”

“Then there’s you,” Laurent says, turning on Jord. Damen finally brought himself to break this up. Laurent was hurting, but that doesn’t give him the right to hurt anyone else. 

“That’s enough,” Damen interrupts, turning to Jord. “Get him out of here before he says anything else.”

“I wasn’t finished,” Laurent says angrily as Jord ushers Aimeric away.

“You’re not doing this, not in this mood.” 

“So now you suddenly care for Aimeric.”

“No, but I care about my business and you’re not going to expose that to everyone right now because you’re upset.” Laurent stared at Damen like he was sizing him up to attack again. “Calm down.”

“You take me home right after this, and I never want to see your face again.” Laurent spits. 

The service is nice, honoring Auguste for his service as a police officer. He’s buried next to his father, who had been honored in the same way many years ago. Laurent allowed Damen to stay right next to him for the rest of the time. When they head out to the graveyard Laurent drags his feet but makes his way right up the the edge, so close that he gets in the way as they lower Auguste into the ground. Laurent stands over Auguste’s grave for a long time, even after everyone else is gone. Whenever Damen tries to get his attention Laurent just shoved him off. Damen has to literally drag Laurent away after it’s been almost an hour since the last person left. Jord tried to stay for a while but after all that he had said to Aimeric it was hard to stay there and not feel uncomfortable. 

“Laurent hey, let’s get you home now. You’re sure I can’t take you back to my place for a while?” Damen asks. 

“I don’t want you. Take me home as you promised.”


	21. Chapter 21

“Orlant!” Damen screams as he stomps inside the abandoned house.

“Damen, what are you doing here?” Orlant jumps up and quickly backs away from Damen. 

“Do you know who I just got off the phone with?” 

“Who?”

“You’re really going to play dumb? Aimeric was arrested because _someone_ told Jord all about him and even mentioned they know who killed Auguste.” Damen takes another step closer and Orlant scrambles back into the wall. “I wonder who the fuck knows who the murder is?”

"Damen, please calm down I promise I didn't say anything about you." Orlant stutters. 

“Yes you did, you fucking idiot! I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you!” Damen screams at Orlant who now backs away into the next room. The two are alone in the house that Jord and Auguste had convinced the police to raid just a few days prior. Nik had been smart enough to completely clear the house of any sign of drugs and let a few people stick around so it seemed like people were just using it for shelter. Those that had stayed told Damen and Nik they kicked everyone out and put up better locks on the doors, so the house was free to use again if they felt comfortable enough. Damen, of course, didn’t feel comfortable with this anymore but he couldn’t stop other people from using it.

"I..It was an accident I swear. He was just asking so many questions, I didn't mention your name or anything. All Jord knows is that I know you. Please don't hurt me!" Earlier in the day, Jord decided to harass Orlant about the murderer like Auguste had done a while back. But this time when Jord questioned him, things got aggressive and Orlant spilled that he knew who the killer was. It was also revealed that Aimeric was involved in this and his house was immediately searched. 

"Hurt you? They arrested Aimeric because of you! And you told a fucking cop you know me? You're going to wish all I do is hurt you." Damen throws him down on the ground and Orlant throws his arms up over his face.

"I'll leave, I'll never bother you again I promise. Just please don't kill me." Damen grabs him by the front of the shirt and pulls him up so he's kneeling in front of him. Damen pulls out his gun and holds it against his temple and Orlant starts crying. "Damen, please! You can't shoot me here, someone will find out what you did and they won’t trust you anymore."

"Well, I guess I was wrong, I thought you were the smart one? How do you think I've gotten this far? They will do whatever the fuck I tell them to. Do you really think anyone is going to care about you?" Right now Damen is too high to be doing this because Orlant reaches up and somehow hits the gun out of his hand. Orlant sprints away to the opposite end of the house.

"I didn't do anything wrong! You won't fucking hurt me, I know too much, you wouldn’t hurt your business would you?" He grabs a knife and runs towards Damen with it. Everything happens in a blur as Damen grabs the knife from him and before he even realizes what he’s doing Orlant’s throat is cut and he falls to the ground dead at Damen’s feet. This wasn’t supposed to happen, Damen didn’t mean to hurt him. He reaches down and grab Orlant by the hair and pull his head up. Blood still squirts out of the giant wound in his neck.

"You did this to yourself. You know what I've done, I can't stop myself." Damen drops his head and take a step back. He's dead, why is Damen still talking to him? "This is all your fault."

It takes Damen a few minutes to get the body out of the house and out back. This is an abandoned house, no one else comes here but whoever Damen tells to so he’s not panicked. After what happened when Auguste sent the police here Damen doesn’t use this place anymore anyways. Damen makes a quick phone call after dumping the body under some plants.

"Nik, I need your help. I did what you told me to do, I took care of the snitch. It was Orlant, it wasn’t Aimeric. But I'm high as fuck I'm not thinking straight I can't do this right now.”

“Can’t do what?” Nik says sleepily. Of course, he would have been asleep right now it’s almost three in the morning. Nik is supposed to be leaving for Akielos in just a few days this isn’t the type of thing he wants to get involved with.

“I killed him. I need you to help me clean this up.”

“Clean this up? What the fuck are you talking about?” Nik yells. 

“Come to the house help me hide his body. I owe you for this." He hangs up before Nik can object and hurries back inside. He grabs the gun and knife and runs back out. This is the first time Damen hasn’t known what to do after killing someone. Normally he’s calm in these situations but he’s so high right now he’s panicking. This is not the type of high that Damen is used to, this is almost too much for his body to handle. Every surge of adrenaline has him fighting to keep from hyperventilating. When he can’t keep the anxiety down anymore he runs away from the house and down the road. It doesn’t even come to his mind that it probably looks a little strange to have Damen sprinting away from an abandoned house at this time. He doesn't know where he’s going but he wants to get as far away as possible right now.

Laurent, his apartment is a little over a mile away but Damen doesn't know where else to go. If he goes back to the motel he’s going to keep this high going and this feeling is not going to get any better. The risk of an overdose is too real for Damen at a time like this. He runs to Laurent's as fast as he possibly can. The cold air makes it tolerable to run with his jacket still on. By the time he makes it he’s so out of breath and terrified he doesn't know what to do with himself to calm down. He doesn't want to scare Laurent, he needs him to stay calm. After a minute of catching his breath, he pounds on Laurent’s door. 

It takes Laurent a while to get out of bed and make it to the door. Slowly he wakes up his limbs, testing his weight before getting out of bed. His body aches but the pounding on the door hasn’t stopped in almost five minutes. When Laurent opens the door to Damen leaning on the door frame he’s disgusted. It’s been two days since the funeral and they haven’t seen each other since. Laurent is about to just let him in to sleep off whatever he's taken on the couch but something stops him.

"What are you doing here? It's three in the morning." Laurent asks. 

“I was close by." He's a mess of tears, sweat, and laughter. He's completely hysteric right outside Laurent’s door for no reason. He takes a few deep breaths and slouches forward, bracing himself against his knees.

"Are you on something?"

"Not now. I wish I still was." He paces back and forth chuckling and mumbling to himself. His hair is a complete mess, clinging to his forehead drenched in sweat. "Can I get high here? No, no you don't like that. That was a dumb question, of course not."

"What happened to you?"

"I did some dumb shit, I fucked up really bad." His laughing stops but now he's still mumbling to himself with sweat rolling down his face. He sinks to the floor, leaning back against the doorframe. 

"What did you do?"

"Something I can't tell you about."

"Do you want to come inside and talk?" Laurent asks. Laurent still doesn’t want to talk to Damen but there’s something wrong and he can’t bring himself to just kick him out. Damen looks down at his feet as he shakes his head, refusing to come inside. "You know that no one's here, come on. No one will see you."

When he refuses to move Laurent grabs his hand and help him stand up. They wander in with Laurent pulling him along to his bedroom, all while Damen continues to mumble quietly to himself.

"He shouldn't have tried that, I was high, it's not my fault." Damen mumbles. When his eyes roll around to look at anything but Laurent’s face Laurent grabs his shoulders to make him look.

"Look at me. There's blood on your face. Are you okay?"

"I..it's fine... It's not blood. I need to go I shouldn't have come here." He shakes his head and turns around to run out the door. “I’m sorry for bothering you, you didn’t want me here.”

"No, Damen get in here." Laurent grabs his hand to stop him and finally gets a close up look at Damen’s face. "That is blood, are you hurt?"

"No." Laurent drags him into the bathroom by the sleeve of his jacket so he can clean up the blood. There's not much, only a few drops on his cheek, some so tiny they weren’t even noticeable until Laurent started cleaning. The blood on his face is in a spray pattern like from a wound that hit an artery. By Laurent’s guess wherever this blood came from is a pretty serious injury. Damen leans against the counter staring off at the wall letting his mind leave the room. The blood is wiped off, and Laurent tries to find where it came from but there's nothing so it must not be his. A quick glance over his body and the only other sign is the blood coating his shoes. Damen’s eyes are dilated and no matter how hard Laurent tries to catch his attention he refuses to look up. Even standing right in his line of vision, Damen is so spaced out that he barely even notices Laurent. 

"Are you high?" It takes him a minute to come back to the room but when he does he shakes his head, pushing Laurent away.

"I already told you no. What does that even matter?" It’s obvious that he’s lying, this isn’t how he acts normally. 

“You just came in my apartment with blood all over your fucking shoes. If you’re high I deserve to know.”

"I'm not high," Damen says, trying to move away again but failing as Laurent shoves him into the counter. 

"Alright, fine. Come on, take off your jacket." Laurent pulls it off of him but Damen doesn't look at him. "Why don't you go shower and I'll make you some tea so we can talk."

"Okay." Laurent leaves him alone so he might go shower. He only gets a step out of the bathroom and a gun falls at his feet from the jacket.

"Careful with that, don't want to hurt yourself." Damen stumbles over to Laurent and picks the gun up off of the ground.

"Why do you have a gun?"

"I always have a gun on me. You have figured out who I am by now, haven't you?" Laurent shakes his head and takes a step back when Damen takes a step towards him with the gun. "Tell me, what do I do?"

"You're a drug dealer," Laurent says when Damen pulls a small bag out of his jacket pocket. He waves the gun around like it's not a big deal but every time it gets near Damen’s temple Laurent flinches. If he shoots himself in a drugged confusion Laurent will be completely traumatized. Just because he doesn’t really want to see him anymore doesn’t mean Laurent wants him dead. 

"Good job. Now, you do know your brother would have shit himself to have the chance to arrest someone like me."

"He's arrested drug dealers before, the only reason he would have given a shit about arresting you is because we were seeing each other," Laurent says. He raises an eyebrow and takes a step closer to Laurent. “He would have killed you if he ever found out.”

"You think I would be so worried about Auguste knowing who I am if I was the kind of person he arrests every day?" He taps the gun against his temple and Laurent starts to panic. He takes a few steps back when Damen gets too close but he grabs Laurent by the waist. "I supply the people Auguste has arrested."

"Let go of me Damianos." He kisses Laurent’s cheek and lets him go. "Go take a shower."

He backs his way into the bathroom and sets the gun on the counter, going to take a shower. Laurent waits in silence until he hears the water start up so he knows Damen got into the shower. When he knows for sure he’s in the shower he goes to make them both cups of tea. It’s three in the morning and Laurent wants to go back to sleep but Damen is high and things need to get sorted out first. After a few minutes, Laurent hears Damen walk into the kitchen behind him. Laurent hands him the tea and Damen smiles a little.

"Thanks, that helped a little. I'm sorry for how I acted." If Laurent brings it back up now then Damen’s going to freak out so it’s not worth mentioning. “I lied to you about not being high.”

“Yeah, I realized.” He holds the mug to his chest and stares down at his feet. Damen doesn’t know how to hold himself around Laurent because he isn’t sure what the two of them are anymore. But Laurent is done with the games tonight so he grabs Damen’s hand and pulls him back to the bedroom. “Are you going to tell me what happened?”

"I can't." He puts down his mug. "I need to go."

“If you’re not going to talk just lay down and go to sleep.” Damen walks into the bathroom and grabs the gun again. “Put that away.”

"I can't stay here." He starts to open the window like he's going to climb down the fire escape. “This is too much, I can’t be here right now.”

"Stop it, you're not thinking straight. You don't need to be alone right now, just lay down and get some sleep." He nods and walks over to the bed with Laurent, shedding both his coat and shoes right away. Laurent climbs into bed but Damen just stands there, staring like he's still upset over whatever he did earlier. However, soon enough he decides to pull off his jeans and climb right in bed too. Laurent still doesn’t really care to have him around but having him sleep in the bed for one night beats the thought of him dying somewhere on the street tonight because he wasn’t thinking straight when he left here. Laurent is too worried that if he has Damen sleep on the couch that he will run away as soon as Laurent goes to sleep. "Are you going to tell me anything about what happened?"

"No, I can't." He rests his head on a pillow and just stares up at the ceiling.

"Fine, you should get some sleep then." He nods and turns over so his back is facing Laurent. Damen crashed hard that night. He doesn’t ever sleep well after he gets high, it's always filled with vivid and strange dreams that leave him shaken the next day. He tries hard for a long time to avoid sleeping, but the feeling of exhaustion is too overwhelming and soon overtakes him. When Laurent wakes up a few hours later Damen is still dead asleep next to him. He hugs tight on a pillow with the blankets pulled up to his neck. His breathing is shallow and the way his body looks so dead makes Laurent so nervous he shakes Damen to wake him but Damen doesn’t move. It takes a few minutes of fighting to get him to finally open his eyes. 

“How did you sleep?” Laurent asks softly. Damen turns his head to face Laurent and smiles. 

“Fine, thank you for making me stay.” Damen doesn’t want to leave this spot for the rest of his life. Laying next to Laurent, who looked so beautiful in the mornings, felt like a dream. “I’m sorry for coming here last night. I was high and scared I’d do something I’d regret if I was alone.”

“Are you going to tell me what happened?”

“I’d rather not drag you into it.”

“You already did when you brought your bloody shoes into my apartment.” Damen completely forgot about those or he might have cleaned those last night. “Do I need to be concerned?”

“It was nothing, just a little accident. The blood is unrelated to what happened.” Talking about what happened last night makes Damen curious if Nik took care of everything or if he needs to leave Laurent’s and do it himself. “I should probably get going soon and deal with it. I know I can’t stay here forever.”

“Do you want something to eat before you go?” 

“No, I’m not hungry,” Damen says. His stomach feels like it’s twisting in knots right now, food is the last thing on his mind. 

“Coffee then?” Damen shakes his head and starts to move away but Laurent reaches his hand out. A light touch to Damen’s arm keeps him from moving away from any further. “It won’t kill you to stay for a little while longer, I want to make sure you’re sobered up before I let you leave.”

“If that’s what you want.” Laurent heads out to the kitchen to make some coffee and Damen takes a minute to get dressed and clean his shoes off so they are ready whenever he leaves. When Damen walks out to join Laurent he is sitting on the kitchen counter already drinking a cup of coffee. “How have you been?”

“His funeral was three days ago, I don’t want to talk about it.” Laurent motions Damen forward until he stands right in between his thighs. Quickly Laurent pulls Damen’s face in to talk in his ear, holding on to him by the back of his hair. “You have no excuse to be getting high, I don’t want to hear why you did it. You told me you’d get clean, and yet here we are after I just lost my brother you come to my house higher than I’ve ever seen you. Stop fucking around with that shit or you’ll get yourself killed.”

“I’m sorry,” Damen whispers back. There’s suddenly a knocking at the door that makes the two of them jump. Damen completely freezes for a moment so Laurent has to push him away far enough to get down from the counter and go to answer it. 

“What do you want?” Laurent asks Jord, who stands at the door in tears. Damen wanders up behind Laurent and Jord quickly tries to hide the tears in his eyes. Laurent might be a cast iron bitch sometimes but they have known each other long enough Jord doesn’t feel weird crying in front of him. Damen, however, is new and he doesn’t know how to act around him yet. 

“Can I come in? Aimeric’s been arrested.”


	22. Chapter 22

“Fine, come in. I just made coffee anyways.” Jord glances at Damen but makes his way to the kitchen to get himself a cup of coffee. When Damen tries to follow Jord, Laurent pulls him back to talk. “I’m not done talking to you. When he leaves you’re going to tell me what’s going on.”

“I already told you everything.”

“You haven’t told me anything if you’re not going to say any more then get out. I have enough to deal with now that he’s here.” Laurent shoves him towards the door but Damen stays there. 

“Fine, we can talk.” Laurent nods and they both head into the kitchen with Jord. 

“So tell me what happened?” Laurent asks.

“I was upset about Auguste and I went to talk to this dealer he went to a few times. I guess things got a little more heated than I meant for them to but he admitted to knowing who killed Auguste and he hinted that Aimeric was dealing.” Laurent freezes at the words about Auguste’s killer. He’s made comments about Damen being the one that did it but hearing a dealer in town knows who did it makes Laurent even more suspicious. “I had to call it in, I couldn’t just ignore it. They found a fucking kilo in his car.”

“He knows who killed my brother?” Laurent asks, completely ignoring what was just said about Aimeric.

“I tried to get him to talk but he refused to say anything more about whoever it is. He looked terrified after he mentioned it like that guy would somehow know he said something and he was going to get killed.” Jord says. Of course, Orlant would be terrified, Damen found out that Jord knew something and Orlant died because of it. 

“Keep fucking questioning him then.” Laurent spits. “I don’t fucking care how break him until he tells you.”

“I can’t, we have nothing to hold him on.” Laurent clenches his teeth and turns his head away in frustration. “Next time he messes up I promise I will.”

“You better do everything possible to make him talk.” Laurent’s body stiffens in anger as he talks. “Torture him like that monster tortured my brother until he gives you a name.”

“I can’t break the law, Laurent.” Jord would never even think about doing something like that to a person. But Laurent is still blindly angry about his brother’s death and would do anything to find the killer. It makes Damen’s chest hurt when he realizes how much Laurent is going to hate him if he ever finds out the truth one day.

“But you’ve been fucking a dealer?” Laurent asks, glancing over at Damen. What Aimeric was caught with was a shipment intended to get to Damen the day of the funeral. But they were both busy on that day and neither of them had the time to meet the other. So now Damen is down two people and lost almost twenty grand because he didn’t take the time to meet up with Aimeric. It wasn’t a large shipment but to have the police find that much coke on him is pretty much the end of his life. He’ll go to prison and by the time he gets out Jord will have moved on and his wish to get away from this life will probably never happen.

“I didn't know, he didn’t seem like the kind of guy. I’m disgusted, I just want to talk to him but he won’t let me see him.” Jord says. “I deserve a fucking explanation.”

“I wouldn’t worry about him, he’ll do well in prison,” Laurent says. He glances over at Damen with a smirk. Laurent hates Aimeric and if he got caught with something of Damen’s, which was easy to figure out, it makes it hard not to laugh. “I never liked him.”

“I know, your brother didn’t really either. I should have trusted you. If he’d just talk to me maybe I’d get an explanation for all of this.” He won’t talk to Jord because their relationship is based on Aimeric lying to him for information. Damen doesn’t know if things changed between them but Aimeric had come to him a few days before and said he didn’t want to be involved anymore. The stuff he got caught with was going to be the last he ever help move. Before, Damen would have been the type of guy to get angry over Aimeric wanting to quit, but he kind of understands now. He spent a week avoiding phone calls and responsibilities trying to make sure Laurent was okay. If Aimeric wants to get away from this life to be with Jord, it’s not that hard for Damen to understand. “I thought he was different. I trusted him.”

“Why? Because he was young and pretty and willingly got on his knees and suck your dick?” Jord is taken back by Laurent’s words and his cheeks turn bright pink. Damen knows he’s right, Aimeric loved to share all the juicy details about his dates with Jord at the beginning. He shared more about Jord than Damen ever cared to know, but essentially that’s exactly what happened. Aimeric flirted with Jord at a bar, went back home with him, and let Jord fuck him half the night. Jord had been trusting of him ever since. “Just because he’d suck your dick doesn’t mean he’s trustworthy. Wasn’t he a little young for you anyway?”

“That’s enough, I get it. I made a mistake, you don’t need to rub it in my face.” Jord says, avoiding eye contact now. His cheeks still burn red from embarrassment but his clenched teeth indicate anger.

“He was an asshole, to me and he played you,” Laurent says. No, this shouldn’t be how Jord finds out. Damen shouldn’t be in the room when Laurent tells him all about things that relate back to him. Jord looks at him shocked so Laurent continues. “You know he drugged me once.”

“What?” Jord practically yells back. Finally, Damen can’t take it and motions the two of them to go sit on the couch. Sitting might help Damen feel grounded and not like he is going to fly out of his body. 

“It was a while back, you guys made me go to the bar with you but you left early. He was being an ass all night but I guess he put something in my drink. I don’t remember much, Damen found me thankfully.” Jord glances over at Damen who squeezes his fingers around the arm of the couch. Even talking about what happened now still makes Damen furious. Sometimes he wishes he would have just killed Aimeric then and not have to feel this anger anytime that day is brought up. 

“Is that true?” Jord asks Damen. He’s starting to notice all the signs that there is something going on with Damen. Damen nods slowly and keeps his hands firmly on the couch to avoid Jord seeing the tremor in his hand. “What the fuck.”

“He was just playing you, I doubt he ever really felt anything for you. Move on and stop crying over that asshole.” Laurent says. But Jord’s attention has stayed on Damen, who is keeping all of his concentration on staying calm. Aimeric makes him angry and crashing from a high like last night makes him easily irritable. Damen doesn’t even think when he takes a sip of coffee and Jord sees the tremor in his hands.

“Damen,” Jord says, grabbing his attention. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing, thinking about what Aimeric did to Laurent makes me angry. You don’t need to hear me talk shit about someone you dated,” Damen sets the mug back down and folds his arms over his chest to avoid doing anything noticeable. 

“Your hands are shaking.” Jord points out. Damen sits upright in his seat. Laurent watches to see what he does but doesn’t say a word. 

“Excuse me for a minute.” Damen brushes past them and into Laurent’s bedroom. It feels like they are still listening in on what Damen is doing so he locks himself in the bathroom and slides down to sit on the floor. He takes a moment alone in the bathroom to calm down. He doesn’t want to sit out there with someone he doesn’t like and listen to him talk about Aimeric, who he also doesn’t like. His anxiety is going crazy and everything that they do irritates him. The exhaustion is starting to hit him hard enough he’s nervous about leaving here alone. His arms and legs feel like lead and the thought of falling back into Laurent’s bed is tempting but that would be weird and inappropriate right now. 

Last night Damen dreamed about Laurent’s death. Usually, dreams like that involve Damen being responsible for the person’s death, but last night was different. This dream Damen was out of his body watching himself kill Laurent. He fought hard to stop what was happening but he was frozen in place. Laurent screamed for help but Damen could do nothing to help him. The sounds still haunt him whenever he looks at Laurent. When Damen walks back out he stops just inside the bedroom so he can listen to them talk.

“Is he using again?” Jord asks quietly. The question shocks Laurent for a moment. He had no idea that Jord knew anything about Damen and his sobriety. They had only ever been alone together twice it seems like a heavy topic for the two of them to have discussed. “He told me he’s been clean for a while. I don’t know, he doesn’t look sober to me.”

“Do you think I’d let him in here if he was using?” Jord sighs and shakes his head. He knows Damen’s crashing, to him it’s obvious, but Laurent is trying to defend him anyway. “My brother would have killed him if he was using now.”

“You don’t have to lie to me.” Jord wants Laurent’s trust, but he doesn’t trust anyone. The only person Laurent has been able to really trust is his brother. “Your brother wouldn’t have done anything to him if you asked him not to.”

“Why did you come here?” Laurent asks. 

“I don’t know Laurent. I went to your brother for everything, I don’t know who I’m supposed to talk to anymore.” He pauses for a second, looking down at his hands. “You’ve always told me things straightforward, I wanted to hear someone tell me the truth about what they think. Everyone else is always so fucking fake.”

“No shit, but I’m not my brother and I don’t know what you want me to tell you. Aimeric is a dick, that’s all I have to say.” They are silent for a moment and Damen almost comes out but they start talking again. “You should go.”

“Okay,” There’s some shuffling around and then the front door closes behind him. A minute later Laurent appears in the bedroom, leaning back against the wall right by the door. 

“So? Talk to me.” Laurent asks. The two of them are now only a few feet apart, and they are only that far because Damen got nervous and moved backward when Laurent walked in. 

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Damen says quietly. 

“Did you kill someone?” 

“What? No, it wasn’t like that.” Damen walks over until he is standing right in front of Laurent. It’s been a while since the last time he touched Laurent and all Damen wants is to be able to reach out to him. “Everything is fine, I was just high and scared I’d do something stupid. I wouldn’t drag you into something like that.”

“You took a lot more than you usually do?” Laurent turns his head away when Damen steps even closer. 

“I combined some things I shouldn’t have,” Laurent looks back in disgust. “That’s why I was acting like that.” 

“I thought you were going to have a panic attack.” Damen can’t help but run his hand lightly over Laurent’s shoulder. He stiffens slightly under his touch but he doesn’t pull away, so neither does Damen. 

“I almost did, before I came over. It would have been worse if you wouldn’t have made me come inside.” 

“I’m glad to hear that.” They are both silent for a while. Damen’s hand stays lightly touching Laurent’s arm. 

“Can I kiss you?” Damen asks quietly. Laurent just stares for a long while, letting his eyes scan over the features on his face. When Damen starts to step away Laurent stops him and pulls his face down to kiss him. It’s not much, just barely long enough for Damen to register what’s happening. The joy of kissing Laurent makes Damen’s thoughts just fall out before he can think about what he’s saying. “I’m going through withdrawal, and I can’t do it around you. But I don’t want to leave.”

“What’s wrong with being around me?” Laurent asks. Damen holds out one of his hands to show off the tremor in his hands that won’t stop.

“I don’t want you to see that.” In a sort of shock, Laurent reaches out to hold Damen’s hand and feel the shaking. 

“You’re not going to leave here and get high?” Laurent starts to let go of Damen’s hand so Damen wraps his fingers tight around Laurent’s. He hasn’t held Laurent’s hand in so long, the feeling of his fingers between his own is overwhelming. 

“I’m going to try not to.” Laurent rolls his eyes and leans back into the wall again. “I’ll make Nik watch me and you can call me every day to make sure if that makes you feel any better.”

“It doesn’t, I trust Nik less than I trust you.” 

“He’ll kick my ass when he finds out I never got clean. You can trust him for this.” Laurent gives in and nods. Damen eventually drops Laurent’s hand and makes his way to put his shoes on. He almost forgot about everything that happened last night with Laurent and his gun. Now that Damen thinks about it he’s horrified by what he did. If Laurent would have made one wrong move there’s a chance Damen would have shot him in the face. Damen ran here last night, but he doesn’t want to bring Laurent into this anymore and he doesn’t want to talk to Nik so he just decides to walk back. When Nik calls, Damen doesn’t answer it. He really should talk to him about last night to make sure everything went okay after Damen just disappeared on him. But he doesn’t feel like talking about it and Nik is going to do nothing but that. It’s a big help having him around sometimes but sometimes Damen wishes he’d just go back to Akielos already. When Damen reaches the house he pauses in front of it for a moment. This place is a huge cause of his stress lately. He killed someone there, he almost got everyone arrested there. Damen makes a mental note to himself and moves on to get in his car. He’s going to burn the house down tonight.


	23. Chapter 23

When Damen left the apartment he promised Laurent that he could call everyday to make sure Damen was sticking to the plan of getting clean. But when Laurent called the next day he ignored the call and sent back a strange text that gave Laurent the idea he had already broken his promise. The night after Damen left, the house that Auguste always talked about and the one Damen seemed so concerned about burned to the ground. The police had immediately assumed it was arson and Damen seemed to be the likely suspect to Laurent. If Damen hadn’t done it then he would at least know who had. So the day after Damen’s strange text Laurent stormed over to Damen’s motel to deal with the bullshit. 

“Alright, I’ve had enough.” Laurent says when Damen opens the door. Damen stands at the door in a pair of loose shorts and a plain black t-shirt as usual. He shoves past him inside and Damen just stares at him until he starts grabbing things. 

“What are you doing?” Damen questions. Laurent hunts down anything he can find in the room that Damen could possibly take and shoves it into a bag full of clothes that he emptied onto the floor. “Laurent, What the fuck are you doing?”

“Get this out of here,” he says, handing the bag over to him. 

“What?” Damen says, beginning to get a little irritated.

“Either you find a place for this or I lock it in my car.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re not going to do this anymore.” Laurent stands with his arm extended out to Damen until he eventually snatches it away and steps outside. A few minutes later he comes back empty-handed with a glare on his face. “You want to be with me, fine. But you are going to get clean and if you won’t do it on your own I’m going to make you.”

“And you really think you can handle me while I’m going through withdrawal? Because I’ll tell you right now that you can’t.” It hadn’t been very long since Damen used and his body was already starting to crave more. 

“I’m not afraid of you,” Laurent says. Damen groans and pulls away from Laurent when he tries to touch him. “What you need to do right now is distract yourself.”

“How? You know it’s not that easy right? It’s going to get really bad,” he sighs and sits down on the side of the bed. “This is why I didn’t get high often. I hate myself for doing this shit.”

“What do you need me to do? I’m going to get you sober.” Laurent walks over and sits down next to Damen. 

“Just, I don’t know, just stay with me I guess.” Damen eventually says with his hands in his hair. “Don’t leave me alone.”

“If you want something more you just need to ask.” Damen’s head immediately snaps up to look at Laurent. He’s so out of it right now he hadn’t even thought about touching Laurent. When Laurent came over here he had it in his mind that sex might be something Damen wanted. But really, all Damen wanted was to sleep.

“I do, but I don’t think I can right now.” He mutters and looks down. “I just want to try and sleep. Can you just lay with me?” 

“If that’s what you’d like.” 

“You need to put on something more comfortable.” Laurent laughs but Damen was serious and stands up to get him a different outfit.

“I’m already comfortable.” Laurent defends. 

“Not for fucking sleeping.” Damen makes Laurent change out of his outfit into a pair of shorts. He spends a minute looking for a clean shirt but gives up quickly, leaving Laurent wearing less clothing than Damen. “That’s better.”

“If you say so.” The shorts are too big on him but it doesn’t matter too much if he’s not leaving the room. Laurent sits down on the edge of the bed and Damen flops down with his head next to Laurent’s legs. “You don’t look too good.”

“Thanks, I know.” Damen chuckles. Damen sits back up and leans his weight on one of his arms he places on the other side of Laurent’s lap so he can lean in close. 

“You know I told myself I’d never come back here, you’re lucky I’m not going to let you kill yourself.” They stay in this position for a few moments unsure of who would make the first move, it would eventually be Damen who leaned in first. The overwhelming feeling in his chest to close the space between Laurent and himself that had kept the two apart for far too long. A space that Damen was responsible for but Laurent didn’t know. Damen takes the first kiss to test his boundaries, but Laurent doesn’t stop him. He still wasn’t sure what Laurent was going to let him do so before every movement he waits for permission from Laurent. Touches between the two felt newer than the first time they met now that Damen had developed a new appreciation for the privilege it is to touch Laurent. The kiss admittedly gets a lot more heated than either had anticipated it would get this quickly and soon they are both lying naked on top of the sheets. When Laurent rolls over to go get a cloth to clean himself off with Damen stops him.

“Let me, stay here.” Damen hurries out of bed and comes back with a warm cloth to clean Laurent down with. Laurent’s cheeks flush at the sight of Damen attentively cleaning him down like Laurent was used to doing for him. “You’ve always done this for me, it’s time for a change.”

“Thank you.” Laurent says quietly. When Damen lays back in bed they both huddle together under the blankets for warmth. It was starting to get cooler outside and the heating in cheap motels doesn’t work well enough to make the room actually warm. Laurent is cold in the motel on a normal day so when the room is too cold for Damen, Laurent relies completely on Damen to keep him from trembling. When Laurent doesn’t cuddle in close enough Damen rolls over to lay his head on Laurent’s chest. Now that Laurent is fine with physical contact again, Damen wants to take full advantage of it. He wants to remember the shape of Laurent’s body, the smell of his skin, the sound of his heartbeat, and any other little details in case he ever loses Laurent again.

“Why did you start using again?” Laurent asks, running his fingers through Damen’s hair.

“I told you that already because I’m an idiot and I wanted something better.” He tilts his head up to look at Laurent’s face. “I got myself into a routine and I needed a change.”

“That’s not all.” he keeps his voice soft when talking to Damen so he doesn’t cause any arguments. Today if Damen doesn’t want to tell the truth then Laurent doesn’t want to push it.

“I don’t want to talk about this,” Damen says, looking away. 

“Damen.” Laurent says a little harsher. When Damen starts sliding away in irritation, Laurent runs his nails softly over Damen’s scalp until he falls completely limp in bliss on Laurent’s chest. The sound of Laurent’s steady heartbeat calming Damen down even more.

“I’ve done some shitty stuff and I feel really bad. I don’t feel like this ever and I don’t know how to fucking deal with it.” He shakes his head and runs his hand over his face but Laurent manages to keep him calm enough that he doesn’t move.

“What does that mean?”

“I feel shitty.”

“Why? Stop being so damn vague.” Remorse. He feels remorse. But Damen can’t tell Laurent that he feels remorseful because that would be admitting he’s done something wrong. And Laurent doesn’t need to know that Damen was the one that killed his brother. Just the thought of Laurent crying to himself over his dead brother in Damen’s apartment whenever he thought Damen was asleep sends him spiraling. When he starts spiraling then he does things he regrets later, like getting high. Getting high makes him feel good but when Laurent finds out what he did he feels even worse than before. There’s no winning right now. 

“I feel guilty for everything I’ve done and you’re the reason I feel like that.” Guilty isn’t the right word, but it’s the closest that Damen can get without admitting fault. 

“You blame me for getting high?”

“No, I mean I blame you for making me feel guilty.” He stutters. “I don’t understand what’s happening to me and I hate it.”

“Guilt isn’t a bad thing. If you don’t want to feel it then don’t do those things that make you feel it. It’s all about learning from the things you did wrong and becoming a better person. Did no one teach you this in Akielos when you were a child?”

“But I don’t know how to deal with it.”

“I don’t think anyone does, but you can’t go back and fix things that already happened. Just deal with the consequences of everything you’ve done the best you can.”

“I don’t want to.” They hear a knock at the door and Damen groans. He grabs Laurent’s waist and holds him closer to himself, making no movement to answer the door. 

“You going to get that?”

“No.” He mumbles. There’s another knock, this time more urgent, and he finally decides to roll out of bed to answer it. He quickly slips on a pair of shorts and makes sure Laurent is covered with the blankets before he opens the door as the person starts knocking for the third time. Unfortunately for Laurent, it’s Nik. He glances behind Damen to see Laurent in bed and rolls his eyes.

“You know, I’m sure Adrastus would pay a lot for a pretty blond like him if you ever feel like selling. He’d go for a lot in Akielos.” Nik says, pointing over at Laurent. When Damen turns to look at him Laurent tugs the blankets up to cover himself more. 

“Why would I ever sell him?” 

“Did I interrupt something?” Nik laughs.

“What are you doing here?”

“You don’t look so good, that kid isn’t letting you get high is he?” Nik glances over at Laurent who gives him a look that makes Nik catch on to what is happening. “Good luck, kid.”

“Doesn’t matter, are you going to answer my question? What are you doing here?”

“We need to talk about what happened.” Suddenly Damen steps outside with Nik and closes the door behind him so Laurent can’t hear anything. He’s gone for a long time before he comes shuffling back inside with his arms crossed over his chest. The cold air from outside sends a chill through the room so Laurent tucks himself further under the blankets. 

“Are you okay?” Damen nods and climbs back into bed. His skin is freezing but he doesn’t seem as bothered by it as Laurent is. When Damen pulls Laurent against his chest Laurent lets out a loud gasp from the cold. He pushes hard on Damen’s chest to try and get away from the cold but Damen just pulls harder and wraps his arms tight around Damen’s waist when he gets a hold on Laurent. The shock only lasts a moment before he’s just left shivering instead. “You’re so fucking cold.”

“Sorry, sorry just stay still you’ll warm back up in a minute.” Laurent trembles in Damen’s arms but stays still long enough for Damen’s body heat to warm them both back up. “Do you want something to eat?”

“Sure, if you don’t do that again.” Damen laughs and sits back up to order the two of them take out. He doesn’t let Laurent do anything but stay in bed when the food comes. The delivery boy eyes Damen until he spots Laurent laying in bed glaring back. Even then he let’s his eyes wander over Damen until Laurent gets pissed enough to let the blanket fall to his waist far enough for the boy to catch on that Laurent still isn’t wearing any clothes and Damen is not available. Damen, being completely oblivious to many things today, doesn’t notice any of this going on around him. As soon as Damen closes the door, Laurent pulls the blankets back up so it stays that way. They both eat huddled in the bed together so neither gets too cold. Damen doesn’t touch much of his food when he claims to be feeling a little nauseous. Instead he spends his time watching Laurent and repeatedly complimenting him on small things that make him blush. Honestly Damen wasn’t actually all that nauseous but he wanted to make sure he didn’t miss anything about Laurent, just as he was doing earlier. None of this stop Laurent from finishing off everything he ordered. “So does Nik know about your apartment?”

“Yes and no. He knows I have one but he doesn’t know where it is.”

“I assumed someone else would know. It feels weird to think I’m the only one that know about it.” Damen smiles and can’t help but lean in and give Laurent a small kiss on the cheek. When it’s time to clean up Damen still refuses to let Laurent out of bed so he cleans up the boxes by himself. “You know I came over here to help you out, having me just sitting here kind of defeats the purpose don’t you think?”

“No, you’re doing exactly what I need you to do.” Damen climbs back into back into bed and pulls Laurent to lay on his chest. 

“I heard that house burned down.” Laurent says. Damen’s heart leaps at the mention of the house. He got really high the night after he left Laurent’s and drenched the house in gasoline. For almost an hour he sat outside just staring at the house before he could bring himself to set it on fire. It wasn’t that he was nervous about going through with it but he was high and everything was making him paranoid. But now the house had been causing him way more trouble than it was worth so it needed to go. If there was any possibility of evidence left behind in there he didn’t want to risk it getting discovered one day. So after a long time of just staring he finally started the fire at the back porch and watched it burn. When half of the house was engulfed in flames he got as much distance between himself and the house as he could possibly do while being as high as he was.

“I saw that yeah.” Damen mumbles.

“Did you do that?”

“No, I was here.” Laurent glances up at Damen so he knows Laurent doesn’t believe that. “I was high, there’s no way I could have done that.”

“Of course,” Laurent mumbles. He looks back down where his hand lay in the middle of Damen’s chest. “A drug dealer getting high, how surprising.”

“Maybe I could quit selling.” Damen suddenly says. His fingers lightly trail over Laurent’s shoulder, down to the middle of his back, and back up again.

“What?” Laurent lifts his head slightly to look up at him but Damen just stares off across the room. 

“This town, this is where your brother died. I have money from selling, we could move away and I could get a regular job like you wanted.” He stops moving his fingers and places his hand on Laurent’s shoulder. “I could move you wherever you wanted to go.”

“You can just drop everything like that? I have a good job here, you expect me to just leave that behind? People don’t just drop everything like that in the real world.”

“Okay fine, we could stay here. But I’d quit selling for you, I’d get out if that’s what you want.” 

“I asked for that a while back,” Laurent says. “Of course that’s what I want.”

“I’ll call Nik tomorrow and let him know.”

“Wait seriously?” Laurent didn’t think he was telling the truth when he said it. Damen has made all kinds of promises that he couldn’t fulfill but he’s acting as he might really go through with this. 

“Unless you want me to call right now?” Damen questions. “Whatever you want, I’ll do it.”

“It can wait until morning,” Laurent pulls himself back down on Damen and holds himself close. They both fall asleep pressed against each other happily. Laurent is finally ready to have a normal relationship with Damen after hiding it for so long. Damen is just happy to do whatever Laurent asks him to do. He’s fallen so head over heels for this man he’s going to do absolutely anything he asked for.  
*

The morning after when Laurent begins to wake up, his limbs are numb and pressed in weird positions. It takes him a moment to wake up before he realizes Damen now lays almost on top of him with his arms wrapped tightly around Laurent’s waist.After a moment of twisting to find a more comfortable position he just has to crawl out from under Damen instead. When Laurent feet hit the floor he quietly slips on Damen’s shorts. It’s already early in the afternoon so Laurent is wide awake waiting for Damen to wake up. The thought of running back home for a quick shower crosses Laurent’s mind but Damen asked him to stay, so he’s going to stay. He would wake Damen but if he isn’t feeling well it’s probably best he gets some rest. Until Damen wakes up on his own, Laurent needs to entertain himself here. That’s when the box on the table catches Laurent’s attention.

When Laurent had emptied out that bag yesterday, the box fell out along with all of Damen’s clothes. Damen got weird and protective over it for a moment and put it on the table, but he never said anything about it. The curiosity had festered in Laurent’s brain for so long he couldn’t help but open it. Inside was less exciting than Laurent admittedly had thought it would be. All that the box contained was just over two dozen Polaroid photos.

The first photo he pulls out is of a blonde girl with her hands tied above her head and a gag in her mouth. Laurent almost puts them back, assuming he found some strange kink of Damen’s but something makes him move on. The woman’s face just seemed too familiar to put away. The next photo makes his stomach drop as the same blonde girl now lay with her throat cut and her body covered in blood and cuts. On the back of the second photo is a name, date, and a number. He flips through the rest of the photos finding more guys and girls with the same blonde hair and body type. One photo alive, the next dead with similar wounds to each person. He even recognizes a few of the names from Auguste always talking about this guy: Jokaste, Erasmus, and Lykaios. Laurent knew what this meant, but he still didn’t want to believe Damen could actually do this sort of thing to these people. He had joked plenty of times that Damen was the killer but he never believed it would be true. It’s the second to last photo that brings bile to the back of his throat and makes him drop the polaroids on the floor. Auguste sits shirtless with his head turned away from the camera. It takes a Laurent a long time of deep breaths and swallowing down so the vomit doesn’t come back up before he can look at the last photo. The last photo is of Auguste dead, his body soaked in blood. When Laurent looks closely he notices the blood still running out of the wound in his neck whenever this photo was taken. The necklace, that now hangs on Laurent’s neck, lays on Auguste’s chest soaked in blood. Damianos is the one who killed Auguste.


	24. Chapter 24

Laurent is so overwhelmed and panicked after finding these photos that he doesn’t know what to do with himself. Discovering this, after he’d finally allowed himself to get back with Damen, sends his mind spiraling out of control. Eventually, he grabs a few of the photos and does his best to put the box back exactly where he found it. As silently as possible he gets dressed so he doesn’t wake Damen. Every little shift or change in breathing makes Laurent freeze in place until he knows for sure that Damen is still asleep. Damen is a very light sleeper and the smallest thing can wake him up. Once he is dressed he hurries out the door and practically runs to his car. Laurent is so completely shocked that the only place he can think to go is Jord’s apartment. Jord usually works nights so he should be home right now. By the time Laurent is knocking on the door he still has no idea what to say.

“Laurent? What’s going on?” Jord asks sleepily as he answers the door. Laurent shoves past him and tosses the photos down on the kitchen table, taking a few steps back to distance himself from them. The pictures of Auguste still makes his stomach churn. “What are those?”

“Just look,” Laurent says quietly. Jord walks up and picks up the first photo and his knees almost buckle. He pulls out a chair and sits, his face suddenly very pale. He flips through all of the photos and stops for a long time on the one of Auguste. It’s like his mind can’t manage to process what this means so he just stares blankly at the photo in his hand. Laurent was afraid of taking all of the photos because Damen would definitely notice that if he opens the box, but if just a few are gone then he might not notice. So he only grabbed a few, including a couple of the ones of the people before Damen hurt them. One of the names Laurent recognizes, Erasmus, looks frightened in the photo of him alive but almost oblivious to what Damen was doing. Damen is a very wild person in general so to get these people tied up in a photo like this, this boy probably hadn’t realized what was about to happen yet. The next photo was very bloody and somehow more personal than some of the other photos. 

“Where did you get these?” Jord eventually asks. His voice is grim and his face shows how tired he seems to be. This photo of his best friend dead is different from how he looked when Jord found him. When he found Auguste in the park he had been cleaned of any blood on his body so the wounds themselves were more obvious. But in this photo, everything seems to just blur together with the bloodiness of everything. 

“They’re Damen’s.” Jord’s head snaps up to stare at Laurent in shock. Damen was not the type of person Jord had thought would be this killer. “Damen killed my brother.”

“Come on, we need to go to the police right now.” He has to drag Laurent down to his car for him to listen. Laurent had been sent into shock finding out the man he was dating killed his brother. If Laurent hadn’t let Damen meet Auguste then maybe none of this would have happened. They both drive separately and when they get to the station Laurent just sits in his car until Jord drags him inside. When they sit Laurent down at an interview table he just stares off at the photos. “Hey, Laurent you need to talk to us okay?”

“His name is Damianos,” Laurent says quietly.

“Where did you find these photos?” Jord stays right next to Laurent the entire time. He doesn’t touch him or say anything but just offers his presence as a form of support. 

“He’s always had this box that he wouldn’t let me look in. I actually forgot about it for a long time but he was sleeping and I got bored so I looked in it and there was a bunch of photos.” Laurent pauses and looks up at Jord. “He killed all of those people and I didn’t know. I should have seen the signs, Auguste told me so much about him I should have noticed.”

“Hey, this is not your fault. You didn’t know. Damen is charming, that’s the whole reason why he’s been able to do everything that he has.” Jord cuts in before the detective can say anything. If Auguste were alive he’d comfort Laurent, so now it’s Jord’s job. “I met him too and I had no idea.” 

“How much do you know about him?” The detective asks. 

“He’s the reason there’s so much coke in the area. His friend helps him bring it in from Akielos. And I think he’s the one that burned that abandoned house down but I don’t have any proof of that.” Jord nods and flips the pictures over when he notices Laurent staring at them again. Laurent found the photos so he’s already seen them but he doesn’t need to keep staring at them. 

“Do you know where he is right now?” The detective asks. 

“Give me a pen I’ll write down the address.” Laurent sticks out his hand and a pen is given to him within seconds. Whatever part of Laurent cared for Damen died the moment he saw the photo of Auguste. He wants Damen to rot in prison for the rest of his life. 

“We need to know how dangerous he is. Does he have any weapons in the room?” A detective Laurent doesn’t know asks him. His eyes stay focused on the pictures in front of him.

“Yeah, he has a gun. I don’t know what else, there’s probably more.” 

“Can you stay here for a while?” Jord asks. “If he’s figured out you took those photos he might come after you.”

“No, no I need to go home. I don’t want to be around anyone.” Jord knows that it doesn’t matter how hard he fights Laurent, there’s no way he can convince him to stay unless he forces him. But forcing Laurent to do anything is going to make him stop trusting Jord and Laurent needs someone right now. Laurent is stubborn and won’t budge if he’s decided on something. 

“Fine, lock the door. Don’t open it until I call and let you know we have him in custody okay?” Laurent nods and heads outside to his car. His entire body feels frozen thinking about everything. He’s the reason Auguste and Damen met so he’s the reason Auguste is dead. All this time he spent angry with whatever force out there lead his brother down this path but really it was himself. 

When Laurent gets home he slowly makes his way inside. The door was lock and everything is in the same place he left it but he’s paranoid as to what he might find. It feels just as different here as it did the day he came home after Auguste’s death. He creeps inside slowly, cautiously looking around to find anything different. He takes a few steps into his bedroom when a blow comes to the back of his head. He lands hard on his hands and knees, with his vision taking a while to come back to normal.

“Stealing my photos while I was sleeping? Really Laurent? You think I wouldn’t notice?” Laurent stands to back away as soon as he hears Damen. But suddenly a gun is pulled out and aimed right at Laurent’s head. “Don’t try and run, I’ve got shit to say to you.”

“So this was your plan all along? To kill me?” Laurent asks. All this time Damen was faking everything that happened. 

“I promised to quit selling for you, didn’t that mean anything? But you had to go looking through my stuff, didn’t you? Now, none of that’s going to happen.” Damen takes another step forward and Laurent runs into his bookshelf. Any movement away from Damen he takes another step closer. “I was going to quit before Auguste too, I just needed time to think but he fucking saw me. He took that choice away from me and I couldn’t just let him live.”

“Do it then, shoot me.” Damen walks forward and presses the end of the gun right into Laurent’s forehead. They stay like this for a long time, staring at each other waiting for someone to make a move. Damen’s jaw clenched tight and his forehead scrunches up in anger.

“Fuck it.” Damen raises the gun up and slams the barrel into Laurent’s temple so hard he falls to the ground dazed. His vision goes black and he lays on the floor for a minute before it starts to come back. But he’s incapacitated long enough for Damen to tie his wrists behind his back and pull out the syringe he brought with him, stabbing it into Laurent’s side. After a moment of fighting Laurent falls still on the floor. When Damen took Auguste away they were outside and it was dark so no one saw what happened. But now it’s daylight out so it is going to be much harder to get him outside. The building and parking lot are typically too busy for Damen to risk just carrying him out unconscious like this. After a few minutes of searching the apartment, Damen comes across a suitcase just barely big enough to squeeze Laurent into with some contorting. Damen is done keeping him alive, Laurent screwed him over so now it's time for Laurent to feel what his brother felt.  
*  
Laurent wakes up a mysterious amount of time later to darkness and the sound of a car stopping. It takes him a while to orient himself and bring feeling back to his arms and legs. His ankles are tied together and his hands are tied behind his back. There’s an intense pain on his shoulder blade that worsens every time it touches something. It takes Laurent even longer to realize there’s a fabric bag over his head. He slides around to figure out where he is and decides he must be in the trunk of Damen’s car. When Laurent hears the sound of the trunk opening he falls still. The longer he stays asleep the longer it will be before Damen does anything to him. He’s carried inside of a house and tossed onto a cold and hard surface. His hands are cut free but brought above his head and tied up again. His ankles are pulled straight and somehow restricted so they can’t move. When the bag is ripped off of his head he keeps his eyes closed so Damen doesn’t know he’s awake. 

"Wake up sweetheart." Laurent feels a sudden slap across his face and his eyes shoot open. "There's no need to pretend to be asleep anymore, I'm bored and I know you're awake."

"What the fuck are you doing?" The question was more hypothetical since he’s seen exactly what Damen is about to do. Laurent tries to pull his hands free but the ropes just dig into his wrists even more. Damen just smiles and paces through the room. 

“I’m done pretending you’re fucking special.” Damen spits. He grabs a camera and quickly snaps a photo of Laurent who turns his head away just as Auguste did. The Polaroid is set on the table across the room and Damen continues pacing.

"What did you do?" His shoulder aches, throbbing and raw as it touches again the headboard behind him. Damen stops and grabs something from off the floor. Quickly he moves to sit with his knees pressed to either side of Laurent’s hips. 

"You're mine now." He holds up a mirror so that Laurent can see his shoulder. He carved the Roman numerals fourteen into Laurent’s shoulder. Damen laughs when Laurent looks up at him in horror and pulls hard at the ropes again. It’s no use, Damen tied the ropes tight enough there’s no way Laurent could slip out of them. Damen slides his knife across Laurent’s stomach to make a slightly deeper cut than he’d usually start with. But what does it matter, there’s nothing typical about this kill. The pain is so overwhelming Laurent lets out a scream. "My beautiful prince, this is going to be even better than I could have imagined."

“Fuck you.”

“You’re much louder than your brother was. He thought if he kept himself quiet it wouldn’t be as fun for me but that didn’t matter to me. It’s the pain I like to see, it doesn’t matter how its expressed and your brother definitely proved that point.”

"Why are you doing this? After all your bullshit neediness." He stares at Laurent for a second with a blank expression. Before Laurent even knows what Damen's doing he brings the knife up and cuts Laurent’s shoulder. "You fucking asshole! Let me go!"

"Why should I? I've had this planned for a long time now. You already ruined part of the plan, I won't let you ruin the whole thing."

“I didn’t do anything, this is all your fault,” Laurent screams as Damen slides the knife over his chest again. “You’re the one who stayed with me for twice the amount of time as the rest. You were too weak to kill me.” 

"Someone's been researching me. You… are very different. I couldn't get myself to do it, I've planned to so many times but you always do something that makes me stop." He spits, standing back up and pacing through the room. "You were supposed to be number thirteen until your brother got in the way. But fourteen, I was hoping this would be one of my favorites and you're making this very hard for me."

"How am _I_ making this hard?"

"I _loved_ you." He shouts, stalling his movement to point the knife at Laurent. "I loved you when I was only getting close to you so that I could kill you and I couldn't do it! I've backed out of it so many fucking times now because I fell for you. But this time I'm not backing out."

“You don’t love me, you could never love me,” Laurent says through deep breaths. The pain from the cuts on his chest is overwhelming and dizzying. “If you loved me you wouldn’t be doing this.”

“You’ve left me no choice, Laurent!” 

“You always have a choice. But I guess when you don’t feel anything you can do whatever you want and not care how it affects anyone else. If you wanted to be with me I would have been happier with my brother alive.” Damen walks right up to Laurent and slices through the top of his thigh. 

“You make me feel fucking remorse. I’ve killed tons and never felt the slightest thing, but then I meet you and you make me feel fucking remorseful for killing your brother and I don’t know how to deal with it.” Damen says through clenched teeth. 

“You could have, I don’t know, _not_ killed my fucking brother.” Laurent spits. 

“Yeah well I can’t go back in time so there’s not really a fucking solution here.” Damen moves to sit over top of Laurent again and slices through his side. “So now I’ll just kill you too and I won’t have to deal with it.”

“That’s not how normal people deal with their problems. Get some fucking therapy.” Laurent falls quiet when Damen points the knife directly against his throat. 

“You’re quite brave for someone about to die. You know that’s why I picked you, because I knew you’d still have a fucking attitude when I do this.” Laurent tries to turn his head away so Damen presses the knife in harder so he can’t move his head in any way without getting cut. 

“Why not be brave if I’m going to die anyway.” Damen smiles and pulls the knife away again. Everytime Damen moves he pulls at the cut on Laurent’s leg and the ones on his chest. Laurent lets his head roll back against the wall trying to control the pain when Damen presses down on one of them. Damen adds two more long and deep cuts across Laurent’s chest making him let out a strangled cry. Laurent tries his hardest to keep himself quiet but he doesn’t have the strength his brother did.

“Damianos, open the door and let Laurent go or we will shoot.” Damen jumps and accidentally drops the knife on the floor. 

“What the fuck,” Damen whispers to himself. Then, louder, “How did you find us?”

“That doesn’t matter, let Laurent go or we will come in there.” Damen quickly stands and picks the knife back up but he doesn’t move to sit over Laurent anymore. 

“You tell me how you found this place or I’ll cut his fucking throat,” Damen yells.

“We’ve been tracking you for months. You were seen not far from this place last time you killed someone.” Damen stays silent but cuts Laurent free from the ropes. After being trapped in this position for so long and with so much blood lost, Laurent’s limbs feel like dead weight so he just lays on the bed for a moment until Damen drags him to his feet. When Damen’s fingers dig into the cut on Laurent’s shoulder he cries out in pain. “Damen we’re coming inside.”

“You come inside and I’ll kill him.” Laurent feels the knife pressed to his throat as the two move backward away from the door. When the people fall silent outside the door Damen moves Laurent around to let him lean against the wall. “Where were we sweetheart?”

“You were trying to kill me. How about we get this over with so they can do their job and kill you.” Damen flinches at the idea of getting killed but he keeps a straight face. 

“Fine, let's get this over with then.” He moves the knife back up to Laurent’s throat and freezes. They stay like this for a few moments as Damen tries to work up the nerve. He went through all this trouble to bring Laurent out here and he’s not even allowed to finish this whenever he wants to. Also, if he kills Laurent now then there’s no negotiating his way out of this, the police are likely going to kill him. The door suddenly bursts open and he quickly pulls Laurent back in front of him. Out of seemingly nowhere he pulls out a gun and puts it right against Laurent’s head. Laurent looks up at him and can see how angry he is, but at the same time, he almost seems terrified.

"Put the gun down Damen!" The same detective from early this morning yells.

"And what if I don't, what if I just shoot him right now?"

"Then we'll have no choice but to shoot you."

"You're going to do that anyway, so tell me why I shouldn't just take him with me?"

"Because you're not going to do that."

"You really want to fucking bet on that right now?! I don't care if it's not what I like to do, I will fucking shoot him. If I don't get him, no one fucking does." Laurent leans forward slightly but the gun presses harder with any movement so he decides its best to stay still. 

"No, you're not going to shoot him because you can't. You've been with him for longer than you were with any of the others, if you could have killed him then he’d be dead already."

"Obviously! But I'm not letting any of you fucks take him from me, he’s mine." His voice softens slightly at the end but he's starting to get flustered. "You see what I did to him just now?"

"He's losing a lot of blood, he's going to die if you don't let him get help and it's not going to when and how you choose." He looks down at Laurent and notices how pale his skin looks and how his legs are starting to give out. Laurent’s vision is starting to go black at the edges but he fights it back, he refuses to die like this he needs to stay awake.

"Then I'll fucking shoot him, you think I care that I love him? I would kill anyone, no matter how close I am to them." He presses the gun hard against Laurent’s head and everyone is afraid he might actually do it. The longer they stand there Laurent’s head gets so cloudy he almost doesn't care if Damen pulls the trigger. He can feel his consciousness being dragged away from him the harder he tries to hold on. Damen is really starting to notice Laurent slipping away from him because he moves his arm to go under Laurent’s so he’s not even holding himself up anymore. Damen seems very concerned for him and it doesn’t make sense to Laurent. Damen's the one who did this.

"Put the gun down and walk out of here with me. Neither of you has to die." Laurent hears a loud clatter on the floor and he’s suddenly being carried out of the room.

"Please don't let him die," Damen says as three officers shove him to the ground. Laurent fights off the unconsciousness long enough to be put on a stretcher and see them walk Damen out in handcuffs before he lets go.


	25. Chapter 25

“Laurent? Stay with me, we’re almost there.” The paramedic says to an unconscious Laurent. This woman doesn’t know anything about Laurent but she talks to him even now that he can’t hear her as if she does. She does her best to keep the wounds compressed and pumps as much fluids into him as she safely can. Blood soaks through all of the bandages and the tourniquet on his leg and onto the stretcher underneath of Laurent. His pulse is sporadic as he’s lost enough blood to be considered life-threatening at this point. “We’re just a few minutes away, just hang on for me.”

The wounds on his chest were deep and the one on his leg was deep enough to show almost an inch of muscle. By some miracle, Damen hadn’t hit any major artery. The trouble was that it was a thirty-minute drive to the closest hospital and there was no blood to give him on the ride there. The paramedic did her best to compress the wounds but there was only so much she could do with what she had. If they didn’t rush him to the hospital it was a very real possibility that he would bleed to death on the drive there. Upon arriving at the hospital the doctors were already outside waiting for him and sprinted him through the building so they could close the wounds. It's very touch and go at this point but in the end, he pulls through.

Jord, who had not been allowed to go to the cabin, rushed to the hospital as soon as he heard the news. No one would tell him what happened over the phone. When he got to the hospital it took a lot of convincing for the nurse to accept Jord as a family member of Laurent’s. He was told to sit in the waiting room until a doctor could come out and talk to him about how extensive the damage was. Jord had no idea what happened to Laurent and he was terrified to lose him. In Jord’s mind, Auguste had trusted him to protect Laurent and now Laurent could be dead for all he knows.

“Sir, are you Laurent’s relative?” The doctor asks when he finds Jord sitting in the waiting room.

“Yes, well, I’m all he has left,” Jord begs. “Is he alright?”

“He’s alive, we don’t know how extensive the damage was yet but he’s alive.” Jord is so relieved he collapses back into the chair behind him. “He’ll be in our ICU for a few days but I can take you to him now.”

The doctor leads Jord down the hall to Laurent’s room. In a sort of shock, Jord can’t move further than the doorway for a long time. Laurent looks horrible and sickly laying in the hospital bed. Just because Laurent survived, didn’t mean he was out of the woods yet. That amount of blood loss can be extremely dangerous and he still needed to be closely monitored to make sure he wouldn’t go into any type of organ failure. He was in such bad shape that he stayed unconscious for an entire day before Laurent opened his eyes for the first time.

“You’re back,” Jord says as soon as he sees Laurent’s eyes start to focus. Laurent fell unconscious after being tortured by Damen and now with a load of anesthesia and pain medications in his system, he can’t process where he is or what is happening. He reaches his hand across his body and rips out his IV in one quick pull before Jord or the nurse realize it’s happening. Blood pours from his arm and Jord is quick to apply pressure to it and holds Laurent down so he can’t do any more damage to himself. He screams and thrashes around in Jord’s arms. After a moment the screaming stops but he starts hyperventilating and keeps fighting to get free. It takes the doctor, what feels to Jord, like a very long time to come in and put Laurent back under sedation. He falls limp in Jord’s grip and a nurse hurries to take over dressing the new wound in Laurent’s hand from the IV. “What the fuck just happened?”

“The medications in his system can sometimes exacerbate a person’s emotions. He’s been through a lot, panic attacks really aren’t that uncommon.”

“What happens now?”

“Keep an eye on him when he goes home, get him help if he needs it. Hopefully, when he wakes up later he won’t react the same.” 

Jord doesn’t leave the room for hours on end in fear of Laurent waking up again. After a few hours, Jord notices Laurent’s eyes flutter open. He stays still for a moment to see what Laurent is going to do but he just reaches down and pulls down the front of his gown to look at all the stitches. He winces in pain at the movement but he wiggles around until he gets his gown down far enough to see half of his chest.

“How are you feeling?” Jord asks, cautiously walking closer to talk. This is the first time he’s seen these cuts too so they both spend a quiet moment staring at his chest. 

“This is all my fault,” Laurent says. Jord glances up at the monitor and sees that his heart rate increased slightly so he prepares himself for the worst. “Damen should have killed me, not my brother. I’m not the one that deserves to be alive.”

“Don’t you dare say that,” Jord mumbles but the tears are already welling up in Laurent’s eyes. 

“I killed my brother, it’s my fault.” He starts hyperventilating and Jord has to yell for a nurse to come in and help. 

“Laurent, look at me. It's alright, calm down.” 

“I want out of here,” Laurent says through the hyperventilating. He sits up and puts his feet on the floor but the muscle in his leg was cut through and is so weak he can’t put weight on it. Jord doesn’t know what else to do so he holds him down on the bed so he doesn’t get up and hurt himself. A nurse and doctor rush in to help and he’s quickly sedated again, falling limp in Jord’s arms. 

“Stop giving him the fucking shit that’s making him act like this! He’s going to hurt himself.” Jord shouts after he gets Laurent laid back into bed. “Get that shit out of his system. He doesn’t even like pain medication.”

“We can’t stop the pain management unless he insists he doesn’t want it but I really don’t think it's a good idea he’s going to be in a lot of pain. But really he doesn’t have much else in his system right now, this is all him.” Jord angrily throws himself back down in the chair when the doctor has nothing more to say. Laurent thankfully sleeps through the rest of the night and late into the afternoon. Jord, however, doesn’t sleep more than ten minutes at a time without getting up to check on Laurent. By early afternoon Jord gets so anxious he paces through the room to keep himself awake. When one of the nurses notices him she brings him in a cup of coffee because she knows he refuses to leave the room to get himself anything to eat. 

“I thought you could use this,” she says. Jord thanks her and sits back down in the chair.

“Thank you, I just don’t want him to wake up again if I’m not here to help.” Jord sighs. “I can’t fall asleep because what if I don’t wake up when he does.”

“Why don’t you take a nap? I can watch him for a while, I’ll wake you if he wakes up.” She grabs a chair on the other side of Laurent and sits down. “Sleep, please you’re exhausted.”

“Thank you,” Jord says, finally agreeing. He naps for a few hours, very uncomfortable in the chair before the nurse softly shakes him awake.

“He’s awake, I’ll go get the doctor.” She tells him. Laurent hears the nurse say this but he has no idea who to. It takes a while for him to really start to wake up. His body aches all over and it is difficult for him to move. When he finally glances around the room he sees Jord curled up in the chair next to him.

“Laurent? Hey, how are you feeling?”Jord asks, shooting up from his chair as soon as he realizes Laurent is looking at him.

“Is he dead?” Laurent mumbles. His throat is dry and sore but he fights through it. Jord hurries over and gets him a drink of water. Laurent hates having people looking after him but he doesn’t have the energy to move very much. “Tell me he’s dead.”

“He was arrested, he’s still alive, unfortunately.” Laurent isn’t sure how he feels about that. He wants Damen to die for what he’s done, but he doesn’t deserve such an easy way out. 

“How long have I been asleep?”

“You don’t remember much do you?” Laurent shakes his head so Jord pulls his chair up closer to Laurent’s bed so they can talk. “Two days, you lost so much blood it was touch and go for the first day, thankfully you’re finally stable. You woke up twice having a panic attack and they were worried you’d hurt yourself more.”

“This is all my fault.”

“Let’s not go down that path again, that’s what started the last panic attack. This wasn’t your fault it was his. He made the choice to do these things, you didn’t know.” Jord is starting to learn what starts Laurent’s spiraling. Things like saying Damen’s name and letting him say that it was his fault cause the panic attacks that almost ripped out his stitches last time. Talking Laurent down is difficult if allowed to go too far before trying if he’s already said Damen’s name multiple times he might as well call the doctor because he can’t stop it. “I do need to talk to you about something.”

“What is it?” 

“Both times you woke up before now I think your panic attack started because of him. Do you think you can handle the trial? I know it will be a while until then but if that’s going to happen again I really don’t want that for you. If you can’t then you don’t have to, they have plenty on him already.”

“I want to do it.” Jord nods and sits back in the chair. 

“I’ll let them know,” Jord says. “For now, just rest. You must be in a lot of pain.” 

“It’s not as bad as it looks,” Laurent says. He looks down under the hospital gown at his chest and all of the stitches holding the cuts closed. He reaches a hand out and runs his fingers over the stitches. 

“Well you’re on some pretty strong pain medication,” Jord chuckles. Laurent immediately starts spiraling at the thought of these medications being in his system. It takes everything in him to not pull the IV in a panic. Jord notices this change in Laurent and quickly stands back up. “Hey, breathe it’s alright.”

“I don’t want any pain medication.” Laurent mumbles. 

“The doctors say you need it,” Jord says. Laurent squeezes his eyes shut but nods his head. “Deep breath, you’ll be alright.”

“I should have stayed when you asked me to,” Laurent says after a few minutes. He opens his eyes to Jord cautiously hovering close to Laurent just in case. 

“You did what you did, but you’re alive and that’s all that matters,” Jord says. Laurent nods and reaches up to grab Auguste’s necklace but it’s no longer around his neck. Jord sees the panic grow on Laurent’s face again as he frantically looks around the room for it. “It’s okay it’s right here, don’t panic.”

“Give it to me.” Jord grabs it off of the table next to Laurent’s bed and hands it over. Laurent clutches tight on the necklace and holds it to his chest. The necklace still helps Laurent calm down when he gets super anxious. Just having something of his brother’s makes him focus enough on where he is and what he’s doing to calm down. “Damen killed my brother.”

“I know, but that’s not your fault.” Laurent nods and lays his head back against the pillow. “Just rest, I need you healthy again.”  
*  
When they finally let Laurent leave the hospital, Jord was so nervous about Laurent being on his own that he invited himself to sleep on Laurent’s couch for a while. While Laurent was irritated about Jord staying with him, he doesn’t try and protest it at all. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing because Laurent’s body was still healing from so much trauma done to it and he needed help getting things done. He had staples holding his body together so he couldn’t even bathe himself the way he wanted to so doing things like cooking was close to impossible without help. 

Laurent had panic attacks almost daily after he got home but, of course, was too stubborn to ask for help and kept it as hidden from Jord as he could manage with him constantly hovering close by. His anxiety got so severe he would check the lock on his window multiple times a day, sometimes even waking him up from a dead sleep. It had been less than a month ago that Laurent’s actions got his brother killed and that guilt was eating him alive. Most days all he could do is lay in bed all day until Jord made him get up to eat something and bathe, but that’s all Laurent could get himself to do before he’d climb back into bed and sleep. It hurt to do anything and the depression that hit him after all of this made Laurent lose a lot of weight. Before Laurent was decently muscular and had a beautiful slender body, but now he was like a skeleton with thinning hair and pale skin. It was horrible for Jord to see Laurent do this to himself and not be able to do a thing about it. Laurent is wasting away in front of him and it makes Jord feel like a failure not only to Laurent but to Auguste as well. 

“Alright Laurent, sit up.” Laurent glances over his shoulder at Jord but he doesn’t move. Jord gets impatient after a moment so he sits down on the bed beside him. “Alright fine I’ll just sit here and talk. I need you to see a therapist if you won’t talk to me. I know you’re having a hard time with everything right now and I know you don’t really enjoy talking to me which is fine but you need to talk to someone else. I can’t stop sleeping here when I know how hard you’re bottling all of this up.”

“I miss Auguste,” Laurent says quietly. 

“I know, me too.” 

“It should have been me that died, not him. I don’t deserve to live as much as he does. I should have been more careful, if I wouldn’t have left my room that day then Damen wouldn’t have met Auguste and maybe things would be different.” 

“Don’t you ever say that. You deserve to live just as much as your brother did. Nothing you’ve done caused this, it was all Damen.” Jord says defensively. “You know a few years ago before your brother found out about the killings he told me that if anything ever happened to him he wanted me to make sure you would be alright. He thought the world of you.”

Jord smiles when Laurent turns over in bed to face him. The skin under his eyes was dark and sagged from lack of sleep. 

“You can stay here for a while if you want.” Jord smiles in relief and nods. “How’s Aimeric?”

“Enjoying prison I assume. He still won’t talk to me.” It hurts to talk about someone Jord loved so much but Laurent has lost so much more, that he doesn’t feel like he deserves to feel like this. “We’re going to put Damen in prison just like Aimeric.”

“No, Damen deserves worse.”  
*  
When the day of the trial comes, Jord drives Laurent to the court. He’s even nervous enough about preparing Laurent for the trial that he spends half the night preparing him. At the courthouse, he stays with Laurent as much as he’s allowed to but the lawyer has to talk to him alone. Laurent spends most of the night and the morning before preparing himself to see Damen again. It had been weeks since the last time he saw Damen and Laurent was not ready to see him again. 

When they bring Damen in the room, Laurent’s heart sinks. They walk him in wearing a prison jumpsuit and with cuffs on his wrists. Two police officers walk in holding his arms like they are afraid he might do something if they don’t hold him back. When Damen spots Laurent he smiles and winks at him on his way by. His personality from how he acted around Laurent before to now is very different. With Laurent, he had anxiety around other people but now he is charming and tries his best to show off to everyone in court. 

When they call Laurent to testify his body has just started to heal. The cuts are healed enough to move but his body feels tight because of all the scar tissue. The cut on his leg makes it hard to walk because Damen had sliced through part of the muscle so he had to keep it almost immobilized for so many weeks. When they call him up to testify everyone stares at Laurent with pity. Laurent looks sickly and broken as he shuffles through the room. He clutched onto Auguste’s necklace around his neck for support. 

Testifying against Damen feels like a nightmare. There are people from every one of the families of the people he’s killed and they all rely on him to give a good testimony. Laurent doesn’t like all this pressure put on him when it comes to Damen. It hurts to even be in the same room as him, he murdered Auguste and tried to kill him. Damen stares up at Laurent with a smirk on his face. The only time his cocky attitude falters is when Damen sees the cane Laurent has to use, but before Laurent sees him again he goes back to smirking. Damen’s point for this is to somehow intimidate Laurent but it doesn’t do anything but make Laurent more ready to take him down. Laurent tells them about meeting Damen, the drugs, the people who worked with him (without naming anyone) and finding the photos. Damen’s lawyer tries to guilt trip him into saying to was his own fault for not doing anything about Damen selling but thankfully he had been prepared thoroughly to deal with that. They ask about any signs Laurent might have missed that should have hinted at what he did. But before he has to answer his lawyer objects and he is allowed to leave the stand. 

When they allow Damen to testify, they point out that no drugs had been found anywhere in Damen’s possession and excluding the photos, there was no real evidence proving Damen did anything to these other people. His only defense for why he attack Laurent the way he did was self-defense in fear of getting in trouble for something he may or may not have done. The defense really wasn’t very strong but Damen seemed more interested at staring at his audience and putting on a show than actually trying to help his attorney. 

Jord begs Laurent to go home and rest once he’s given permission to leave because he’s still healing from his wounds, but he refuses. Laurent wants to see this case through to the end to make sure Damen gets the sentence he deserves. Since Laurent is the main person testifying he only has to sit through a few more days. While Damen’s lawyer spends his time trying to defend Damen, Damen spends his staring back at Laurent with a smile and looking at the jurors until he makes them nervous. The juror will be paying attention to whoever is talking and will notice Damen’s eyes on them, immediately sending fear through them and making Damen laugh silently to himself. After the last day of the trial, Laurent goes his separate ways so Jord can run home to wash some clothes. As Laurent drives himself home that afternoon he gets a call from Jord.

"Laurent listen to me. Get out of your apartment, get in your car and meet me at my place."

"What? Why?"

"Damen got out. They were moving him in the courthouse and I guess there was a mix up with the guards I don't know but he got out. We don't know where he went and we don't know if he's coming to you but you need to be careful. I need you to come here so you don’t get hurt." He hangs up and leaves Laurent’s heart racing. Damen is out and he's probably going to come after him now. He stumbles inside and manages to lock the door behind himself. Jord told him to come over but he’s already home so he might as well grab the things he needs. He heads into his bedroom to check and make sure the window is still locked. All those times Damen used to sneak in the window to see Laurent, he wished he would have seen the signs sooner. He knew there was something wrong from the start but he didn’t want to admit it to himself. Maybe none of this would have happened, maybe his brother would still be alive. He’s dazed with fear when the bedroom door shuts behind him.

"Hey, sweetheart."


End file.
